Read Online Ache for You (Trapped in Three Hill Book 1) by Nancy Beaudet - Free Book Online

Flo talk to me. Stop leaving me.
                  I cover my face in shaving cream, picking up the razor I stole from my mom’s place. It’s pink. It doesn't cut me. I also stole her shaving cream. I hate going to the store, I hate shopping.
                  I hate making small talk with the shy cashier. The bathroom fan is going crazy. I turned it on without realizing.
                  I think my house is silent, but my ears are humming. There is music in my mind. Music and noise.
                  I'm screaming on the inside. No headphones can block out my own screams. Believe me I’ve tried, a couple hundred times. It just keeps aching.
                  The urge to start bleeding hangs in front of me, like a wet rag I’m too grossed out to throw away. I don’t want to touch the damn thing; it could have a disease. Doesn’t that remind you of me?
                  Diseased?
                  I mean, I haven’t had an STI or anything.
                  I’m clean, metaphorically speaking. I spread shaving cream over my jaw, slapping it to the sides of face. I start shaving.
     

   Consumed - Flo
     
                  I stayed up all night. This shouldn’t mean anything, the dead don’t need sleep. At least, that’s what the world makes you think.
                  I still need sleep.
                  I still like sleep.
                  I’m still lazy, and would much rather do nothing all day than do a hundred fun and exciting things.
                  I don’t like people; I don’t like talking or joining in on activates when nobody wants me around. This is why I preferred sleeping during the afternoons when I was supposed to be at school.
                  I stayed up all night, kneeling on the ground beside you. I spent all night watching you and loving you, my heart broke when your breathing finally evened out. You fell asleep on your couch.
                  I cried beside you. I cried like a pathetic, whiny ex-girlfriend who couldn’t let go but was being forced too. I forced myself, I know.
                  I was never your girlfriend Mal. I sure as hell am not your ex now.
                  You woke up, looking around as you cursed yourself out. I backed up, pushing myself up using the coffee table. “Mal?” I whimper, smudging snot off of my face with my knuckles.
                  You look awful. You sound awful. Your voice is hateful. I cling to it in the shadows. I cling to you.
                  You peel off all of your clothes, and I see all of you. I’ve never seen all of you. We’ve kissed, we’ve groped. We never made it into a bedroom.
                  I don’t know if I’m thankful for this now, or if I regret it more than you will ever know. You once told me that you wanted to watch me let go.
                  Did you?
                  I follow you into the shadows. You stumble up the stairs and I stay behind you, fully prepared to try to catch you if you fall.
                  Oh God, this is something that only a truly perverted bitch would do. I'm watching you shower Mal. I'm standing right behind you. I’m in your bathroom. That quick shave did nothing for you.
                  Come on.
                  Wipe the pain out of your eyes and let the crying go. Holding it in only looks worse on you.
                  My body hums when you turn around, and I look down south. I can't help it okay? I always wanted to jump you but to see you vulnerable awakens all sorts of emotions that I buried long ago.
                  I swallow and blush when you look me and up and down. In reality you are just looking at your bathroom wall. You can't see me at all. I am invisible, a ghost. I could probably touch you