Read Online Selby's Shemozzle by Duncan Ball - Free Book Online

kill me.’
    â€˜So when will your friend be coming over?’ Mrs Trifle asked.
    â€˜She’s here. She’s in the car right now. I’ll bring her in.’
    Selby watched as the big woman and her enormous dog came through the door. Fred stared at Selby and silently curled his lip, showing a full set of pointy teeth.
    â€˜Good grief,’ Selby thought as he backed away. ‘This is no dog — it’s a shark! Settle down, big fella. I won’t hurt you.’
    That afternoon, Mrs Trifle and Bertha had lunch while Fred ate all of Selby’s Dry-Mouth Dog Biscuits.
    â€˜Blindness isn’t much fun,’ Bertha told Mrs Trifle, ‘but my life is pretty normal, thanks toFred. He gets me around fairly well. I do sometimes miss getting out into nature — hiking, mountain climbing, kayaking — the sort of things I used to do before my accident. But never mind about me, you’ve got work to do.’
    â€˜I am a little busy,’ Mrs Trifle said. ‘I have a bit of work to do for my council meeting.’
    â€˜Well, I might just go for a walk,’ Bertha said. ‘Oh, I forgot — sore leg.’
    â€˜I’m terribly sorry,’ Mrs Trifle said. ‘I hope you feel better soon.’
    â€˜It’s not me,’ the woman said, ‘it’s Fred. I must have walked him too hard yesterday.’
    â€˜I’ll take you for a walk,’ Mrs Trifle said. ‘My work can wait.’
    â€˜I couldn’t ask you to do that. You’re a busy woman. I have some books on CD that I can listen to. But wait a minute — what about that dog of yours?’
    â€˜What about him?’
    â€˜Maybe he could walk me around the block.’
    â€˜I suppose so, but he’s not a guide dog. Guide dogs have to be very well trained, don’t they?’
    â€˜What’s so hard about being a guide dog?’ Selby thought. ‘I could take her for a walk.’
    â€˜Yes, they have to be well trained,’ Bertha said. ‘They can’t just go chasing cars or cats or sticks — ’
    â€˜I don’t chase cars or cats or sticks,’ Selby thought. ‘The only thing I ever chased was a peanut prawn that was falling off a plate — and I caught it before it hit the ground.’
    â€˜ — and they have to be responsible — ’
    â€˜I’m responsible.’
    â€˜ — and, most of all, they have to be intelligent.’
    â€˜Hey, hang on, I’m intelligent. I’d be a terrific guide dog. I can even read signs. What guide dog can do that? And I could ask for directions (but I wouldn’t, of course).’
    â€˜I’ll tell you what,’ Bertha said, ‘put a leash on your dog. I’ll take my white stick, and I’m sure between the two of us I’ll be able to go for a short walk.’
    â€˜Are you sure?’
    â€˜Yes, of course I’m sure and I insist.’
    â€˜I’ll show her,’ Selby thought.
    It was a careful, responsible and intelligent dog that led the blind woman up the driveway to the street and then along the footpath.
    â€˜Come on, dog, let’s get a wriggle on,’ the woman said. ‘How am I going to get any exercise at this speed?’
    Selby led the woman twice around the block and then once around again.
    â€˜You’re going fine, dog,’ the woman said. ‘Another hour should do it.’
    â€˜Another hour? No wonder Fred is lame. And I’m beginning to feel like a merry-go-round horse going round and round and round,’ Selby thought. ‘I think I’ll take her somewhere a bit more interesting. How about a walk along the creek?’
    Selby stopped and looked both ways before crossing the street.
    â€˜Hey, we’ve crossed a street,’ the woman said. ‘Good one, dog. Take me somewhere interesting.’
    Selby led the woman down the street and then across a field and up a hill.
    â€˜Bravo!’ she said.