screaming it in a cold sweat and bolting upright in bed in a week.
“I had a good tutor.” She shrugs like it’s no big deal. “Thank you for that too.”
“Oh. That’s okay. You don’t have to thank me, Evie. Really. Must be excited to have your afternoons free again, huh?”
Especially since you wouldn’t want to spend an afternoon with me, anymore .
Wonder if I should still give her the chocolate I promised her if she got an A? Wonder what in the hell I’m going to do with the entire case of it that’s sitting in my room?
“Um, I’m actually so far behind on everything after a week of not being able to read that I wonder if I’ll ever catch up. Pretty sure I can’t get that top spot back now even if I try.”
“Yeah, I’m pretty under water too. Guess neither of us is going to be Valedictorian.”
She shuffles around a bit, looking down at her feet, across the hallway at the lockers, anywhere but at me. I can tell she has more to say, so I guess this is it. The part where she tells me to talk to Mrs. Anderson as soon as we walk in that door because she just can’t stand being near me. I brace myself for the inevitable as she takes a deep breath.
“Do you, um...do you want to try to catch up together? Seems a shame to abandon our competition and just roll over and hand the spot to someone else. We could, uh...meet in the library like we used to.”
Pretty sure my mouth is hanging open. Pretty sure I can’t do a damn thing about that right now. Does not compute. I don’t know how long I gape at her like that, but she never wavers, waiting on some kind of response from me. Maybe she didn’t mean it. She probably didn’t mean it.
“I’m sorry. I can’t. I actually...have somewhere to be right after practice.”
“Oh, uh, okay. Finally finish your 12-step program? ” She tries to smile at me, but it comes off as more of a grimace.
“No. That’s uh…that’s over. No more 12-step program.”
She furrows her brow and bites her delicious lip again. “Oh. Well, are you doing something fun at least? Hanging out with your teammates?”
“If your idea of fun is being forced to meet with a therapist, then yeah. It’s gonna be a barrel of laughs.”
Her expression morphs into worry. As inappropriate as it is, I have to stifle back a laugh. She’s worried about me even though she’s the one that had the shit beaten out of her.
“You’re...seeing a therapist?”
“Yeah. Mom and Dad kinda had enough after I missed the game on Friday, ya know?” I look away. I can’t take her eyes anymore. Like I don’t already feel guilty enough. Now I can’t keep my damn mouth shut. Really, really wishing I hadn’t come to school today.
“No. I didn’t know. I mean, I know what you’re going through. Sorry, I didn’t mean I know what you’re going through. I have no idea. I mean, I do, but...I still don’t remember. I’m sure it’s different anyway. I meant...my family is pushing me to talk to someone too, but I just...I can’t do that.”
I blow out a controlled breath in response to her awkward explanation. “I wasn’t trying to unload my problems on you, Evie. You’ve got enough of your own shit to deal with.”
“Yeah. You too. I guess.” Her voice quiets with each syllable.
“So, uh. Listen, we’re late. I can skip if you’d rather not sit next to me, and I’ll catch up with Mrs. Anderson after class.”
I know she didn’t mean any of the stuff she said. She’s trying to be nice because deep down, that’s who she is. A nice person. A sweet girl. My sweet girl.
“We don’t have to switch partners, Rob. I mean, if you want to, I completely understand. But, we don’t have to. It’s up to you.”
When I swing my gaze back to meet hers, her eyes seem unwavering. She’s not throwing up her usual mask at me. Damn. She really means it.
“I already told you, Evie. It’s whatever you want.” I can give her one more out. It’s the least I can do.
“Honestly? I
“I had a good tutor.” She shrugs like it’s no big deal. “Thank you for that too.”
“Oh. That’s okay. You don’t have to thank me, Evie. Really. Must be excited to have your afternoons free again, huh?”
Especially since you wouldn’t want to spend an afternoon with me, anymore .
Wonder if I should still give her the chocolate I promised her if she got an A? Wonder what in the hell I’m going to do with the entire case of it that’s sitting in my room?
“Um, I’m actually so far behind on everything after a week of not being able to read that I wonder if I’ll ever catch up. Pretty sure I can’t get that top spot back now even if I try.”
“Yeah, I’m pretty under water too. Guess neither of us is going to be Valedictorian.”
She shuffles around a bit, looking down at her feet, across the hallway at the lockers, anywhere but at me. I can tell she has more to say, so I guess this is it. The part where she tells me to talk to Mrs. Anderson as soon as we walk in that door because she just can’t stand being near me. I brace myself for the inevitable as she takes a deep breath.
“Do you, um...do you want to try to catch up together? Seems a shame to abandon our competition and just roll over and hand the spot to someone else. We could, uh...meet in the library like we used to.”
Pretty sure my mouth is hanging open. Pretty sure I can’t do a damn thing about that right now. Does not compute. I don’t know how long I gape at her like that, but she never wavers, waiting on some kind of response from me. Maybe she didn’t mean it. She probably didn’t mean it.
“I’m sorry. I can’t. I actually...have somewhere to be right after practice.”
“Oh, uh, okay. Finally finish your 12-step program? ” She tries to smile at me, but it comes off as more of a grimace.
“No. That’s uh…that’s over. No more 12-step program.”
She furrows her brow and bites her delicious lip again. “Oh. Well, are you doing something fun at least? Hanging out with your teammates?”
“If your idea of fun is being forced to meet with a therapist, then yeah. It’s gonna be a barrel of laughs.”
Her expression morphs into worry. As inappropriate as it is, I have to stifle back a laugh. She’s worried about me even though she’s the one that had the shit beaten out of her.
“You’re...seeing a therapist?”
“Yeah. Mom and Dad kinda had enough after I missed the game on Friday, ya know?” I look away. I can’t take her eyes anymore. Like I don’t already feel guilty enough. Now I can’t keep my damn mouth shut. Really, really wishing I hadn’t come to school today.
“No. I didn’t know. I mean, I know what you’re going through. Sorry, I didn’t mean I know what you’re going through. I have no idea. I mean, I do, but...I still don’t remember. I’m sure it’s different anyway. I meant...my family is pushing me to talk to someone too, but I just...I can’t do that.”
I blow out a controlled breath in response to her awkward explanation. “I wasn’t trying to unload my problems on you, Evie. You’ve got enough of your own shit to deal with.”
“Yeah. You too. I guess.” Her voice quiets with each syllable.
“So, uh. Listen, we’re late. I can skip if you’d rather not sit next to me, and I’ll catch up with Mrs. Anderson after class.”
I know she didn’t mean any of the stuff she said. She’s trying to be nice because deep down, that’s who she is. A nice person. A sweet girl. My sweet girl.
“We don’t have to switch partners, Rob. I mean, if you want to, I completely understand. But, we don’t have to. It’s up to you.”
When I swing my gaze back to meet hers, her eyes seem unwavering. She’s not throwing up her usual mask at me. Damn. She really means it.
“I already told you, Evie. It’s whatever you want.” I can give her one more out. It’s the least I can do.
“Honestly? I
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