really,” Stella says. “Your dad thought he was the Fonz for a bit after his brain surgery.”
“They went through with it? The surgery? No wonder you look like hammered shit,” Charlie asked. “How’d they do it?”
“Dentist’s office,” I say. “I pretty much feel like I want to puke all the time and my head really, really hurts. But the Fonzie thing was cool.” I go to give a thumb-up. Thumb does not respond. “Ah, shit.”
“He’s lucky to be alive, let alone awake and not a drooling idiot,” Stella says.
Elsbeth starts to speak and I try to point at her, but my finger won’t respond either. My left hand sort of flops about. “Don’t say a word, El. Not one word about me always being an idiot.”
“You kill the fun, Long Pork,” Elsbeth says.
“I am not here for your amusement,” I say.
“How do we get the conditioning off?” Stella asks. “Jace and I know our trigger words. It’s not like we can just say them now.”
“Yeah, that’s the shitty part,” Charlie says. “It’ll be easier for you, Mom. I’ll surprise you with it somehow. But I have no idea how we’ll do it for Dad. If it goes wrong, he’ll end up catatonic.”
“Or dead,” Elsbeth shrugs. “Kramer has that built in. Might be why your brain has gone all circuit short.”
“Short circuit,” Charlie says. “But, yeah, dead is possible.”
“Aaayyy? The Fonz doesn’t want to die or be a hypnotized robot,” I say. “The Fonz thinks this is all way uncool.”
“Dear God,” Stuart sighs.
“I know a fix,” Elsbeth says and picks up the bat by her feet. “Someone says the words to you while I hit you in the back of the head with my bat. Only hurts for a second.”
“What?” Stella exclaims.
“It’s why El needed my help,” Charlie says. “She knew I could say the words right.”
“He’s smart,” Elsbeth smiles. “Like his mama.”
“Fuck you too, El,” I smirk. “And pretty sure that’ll kill me. So, not really an option.”
“Why is my son involved in this, really?” Stella asks. “There are lots of capable, smart, trained people in our group.”
“Kramer hadn’t gotten to me yet,” Charlie said. “So there’s that.”
“And I trust Charlie,” Elsbeth says. “Don’t trust the others.”
“How’d Kramer get to all of us?” I ask.
“He’s a sneaky fuck,” Elsbeth says. “Already told ya that, Long Pork. Pay attention. Stop being brain-surgeried dumb. Ain’t no time for Long Pork to be brain-surgeried dumb.”
“He does it in stages and layers,” Charlie says. “A conversation here, a conversation there. He only needs a few seconds alone with you at a time.”
“Jesus,” Stuart says. “How’d you even find this out?”
“I found it out,” Elsbeth says. “Went to kill him one night because I was done with him being alive and found the notebook. Decided to read it before killing him. Saw my name and something flashed in my head. Like a small movie. I figured it out.”
“The words didn’t affect El anymore because she hurt herself before that Pa guy found her,” Charlie says.
“Stop,” Stella says. “Just stop. Why?”
“What?” Charlie asks.
“Why did you really need Charlie?” Stella asks Elsbeth. “You could have come to one of us, had us read the words, and then we wouldn’t have been conditioned. We could have formulated a plan and helped everyone else in the convoy out.”
“Didn’t want to help the convoy,” Elsbeth said. “Too many people. Too hard. Most of them are weak anyway. Useless. Needed to fix the ones that aren’t weak. They’re worth more than all the convoy put together.”
“Thanks, El,” Stuart says.
“Elsbeth? What do you mean?” Stella asks. “Who did you help?”
Elsbeth looks at the tied-up and unconscious form of Cassie a few feet away. “Who do you think? My sisters. Took Charlie with me and we found them then we fixed them. One by one. The last one is Cassie.”
“We’ve tried to fix her
“They went through with it? The surgery? No wonder you look like hammered shit,” Charlie asked. “How’d they do it?”
“Dentist’s office,” I say. “I pretty much feel like I want to puke all the time and my head really, really hurts. But the Fonzie thing was cool.” I go to give a thumb-up. Thumb does not respond. “Ah, shit.”
“He’s lucky to be alive, let alone awake and not a drooling idiot,” Stella says.
Elsbeth starts to speak and I try to point at her, but my finger won’t respond either. My left hand sort of flops about. “Don’t say a word, El. Not one word about me always being an idiot.”
“You kill the fun, Long Pork,” Elsbeth says.
“I am not here for your amusement,” I say.
“How do we get the conditioning off?” Stella asks. “Jace and I know our trigger words. It’s not like we can just say them now.”
“Yeah, that’s the shitty part,” Charlie says. “It’ll be easier for you, Mom. I’ll surprise you with it somehow. But I have no idea how we’ll do it for Dad. If it goes wrong, he’ll end up catatonic.”
“Or dead,” Elsbeth shrugs. “Kramer has that built in. Might be why your brain has gone all circuit short.”
“Short circuit,” Charlie says. “But, yeah, dead is possible.”
“Aaayyy? The Fonz doesn’t want to die or be a hypnotized robot,” I say. “The Fonz thinks this is all way uncool.”
“Dear God,” Stuart sighs.
“I know a fix,” Elsbeth says and picks up the bat by her feet. “Someone says the words to you while I hit you in the back of the head with my bat. Only hurts for a second.”
“What?” Stella exclaims.
“It’s why El needed my help,” Charlie says. “She knew I could say the words right.”
“He’s smart,” Elsbeth smiles. “Like his mama.”
“Fuck you too, El,” I smirk. “And pretty sure that’ll kill me. So, not really an option.”
“Why is my son involved in this, really?” Stella asks. “There are lots of capable, smart, trained people in our group.”
“Kramer hadn’t gotten to me yet,” Charlie said. “So there’s that.”
“And I trust Charlie,” Elsbeth says. “Don’t trust the others.”
“How’d Kramer get to all of us?” I ask.
“He’s a sneaky fuck,” Elsbeth says. “Already told ya that, Long Pork. Pay attention. Stop being brain-surgeried dumb. Ain’t no time for Long Pork to be brain-surgeried dumb.”
“He does it in stages and layers,” Charlie says. “A conversation here, a conversation there. He only needs a few seconds alone with you at a time.”
“Jesus,” Stuart says. “How’d you even find this out?”
“I found it out,” Elsbeth says. “Went to kill him one night because I was done with him being alive and found the notebook. Decided to read it before killing him. Saw my name and something flashed in my head. Like a small movie. I figured it out.”
“The words didn’t affect El anymore because she hurt herself before that Pa guy found her,” Charlie says.
“Stop,” Stella says. “Just stop. Why?”
“What?” Charlie asks.
“Why did you really need Charlie?” Stella asks Elsbeth. “You could have come to one of us, had us read the words, and then we wouldn’t have been conditioned. We could have formulated a plan and helped everyone else in the convoy out.”
“Didn’t want to help the convoy,” Elsbeth said. “Too many people. Too hard. Most of them are weak anyway. Useless. Needed to fix the ones that aren’t weak. They’re worth more than all the convoy put together.”
“Thanks, El,” Stuart says.
“Elsbeth? What do you mean?” Stella asks. “Who did you help?”
Elsbeth looks at the tied-up and unconscious form of Cassie a few feet away. “Who do you think? My sisters. Took Charlie with me and we found them then we fixed them. One by one. The last one is Cassie.”
“We’ve tried to fix her
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