these two seemed quite content.
I whipped off my Cap of Invisibility to make them jump, and they did. It’s a cheap trick, but sometimes I can’t resist.
“Lord Hermes!” Paris knelt with easy grace.
“Good day,” I said. “You are Paris?”
“I am.”
“And you are—?” I asked the nymph.
“Oenone,” she said, “of the river Oenus.”
I recognized the name; I had heard it from Apollo. Long ago, when he himself was living as a shepherd, he’d taken a liking to the nymph and taught her the art of healing.
And now you devote your time to Paris,
I thought,
who doesn’t seem to appreciate you.
“I come with a message from All-Powerful Zeus,” I told Paris, and his eyes widened. “He wants you to judge a contest.”
“Livestock?” he asked eagerly.
“Not exactly,” I replied. “Beauty.”
I told him about the apple and its inscription and the uproar it had caused on Olympus. “Because you possess great beauty yourself, Zeus thinks you can be impartial in the judging of it,” I said.
A rosy flush crept up his neck. “I—I am so surprised!” he said with emotion. “This is a great honor! And—and I will do my best to be fair and impartial, as Lord Zeus wishes.” He touched his hand to his heart, as men do when they make a vow.
Until this moment Oenone’s eyes had never left Paris; now they closed, hard.
She’s afraid of losing him,
I thought.
And she may.
The nymph was lovely, but the goddesses were magnificent, and all of them had dallied with mortals—even, it was rumored, solemn, virginal Athena. Seducing mortals was one of the great guilty pleasures of the gods, second only to tipping cattle and ruining the weather. Paris might tempt any one of them. He did not seem the type to resist any beautiful female, much less a divine one.
I pitied Oenone.
“The goddesses may try to sway you,” I warned Paris, knowing it was more than a possibility. “Don’t let them!”
“I won’t, I swear,” he promised.
TWENTY-ONE
I can’t really blame Paris for what happened next. He did try to be fair. But the goddesses were at their worst that day—working the poor fellow like wet clay, twisting and bending and pulling at him until he didn’t know what to think. It was sad. And I couldn’t do anything about it, because I wasn’t supposed to be there.
I meant to return to Olympus after escorting the goddesses to Mount Ida, truly I did; once they had met Paris, my job was over. But after introducing everyone, saying goodbye, and bounding into the air, I changed my mind. The three Immortal Ones, fixed on Paris like cobras on a baby bird, looked so resolute, so splendid!
Why shouldn’t I watch?
I thought.
There’s no harm in
it.
I was flying over a stand of tall cypresses, hidden from view, when I decided. So I put on my Cap of Invisibility, doubled back to the spot where Paris stood with the divine trio, and settled down to spectate.
I had barely made myself comfortable when Aphrodite did what she does best: she disrobed.
“You can judge me better this way,” she said to Paris, shrugging off her diaphanous gown and stepping out of her tiny golden sandals. “Don’t you think?” She turned with practiced languor, showing off her glorious body, which was bare except for her magic girdle. Fashioned by Hephaestus of fine gold mesh set with gems, the girdle made its wearer completely irresistible. Hera borrowed it sometimes when she wanted Zeus’ undivided attention, but it usually stayed where it belonged, around Aphrodite’s waist. At the moment, it was having a very strong effect on Paris. He looked as if he’d been poleaxed.
Hera and Athena looked stunned also, but for a different reason. They never gave Aphrodite much credit for intelligence—they considered her an ornamental scatterbrain—and now she’d truly put them on the spot. Unclothed, she was as radiant as an ocean pearl, and Paris’ eyes were riveted to her. His shapely legs actually wobbled. If Hera and Athena
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