Read Online Never Without Hope (Sacred Vows Book 1) by Michelle Sutton - Free Book Online

and kiss, he yawned and sauntered off to bed.
    Well, at least my boy knew how I really felt. That was something. And I knew he loved me back. But lately with James acting the way he did, I wasn ’t sure about his feelings at all. I just needed a little confirmation, you know?
    I sat on the couch —near James’s chair—for several minutes just to see if he’d notice me. He didn’t, of course. Hurt and disappointed—though his detached response was completely expected—I peeked in to see if Jimmy was sleeping, and the boy was actually snoring! So I did something daring. I pulled off my shirt as I walked by the television, revealing my black lace bra.
    Nothing. No response at all. Not even a whistle.
    In tears again, I slinked into our bathroom and washed my face before climbing into bed. Exciting dreams of my encounter with Tony earlier that day filled my mind until I woke up frustrated. I glanced over at James’s side of the bed. Empty.
    It wasn ’t quite midnight yet, so I decided to see if he was still up watching television. But first, I donned a black see-through baby doll that James had bought me when things were still wonderful between us. That outfit should get his attention.
    I grinned with delight when I thought about the bliss our encounter would bring. He would make love to me again. He just needed encouragement.
    Slipping quietly into the living room, I noticed he’d turned the lights down low. A heated scene played on the television, and I stared, wondering why James could watch other people getting intimate when he wouldn’t do that with me. Then I recognized the movie, and couldn’t help staring myself as the couple made love on the beach.
    In the past whenever I ’d walk in front of him with my sexy nightie and flaunt my stuff, he’d get aroused, grab me, and pull me onto his lap. As I listened closer, I heard heavy breathing and wondered if the movie had turned James on.. I slinked around the corner, and not wanting to miss a chance to feel my husband inside me, I thought I’d try that strategy again.
    I stood right in front of him in an alluring pose.
    “Hope, what the…!”
    James actually cursed at me!
    Then I realized what he’d been doing, which hurt and confused me even more. But the evidence of his excitement was still apparent, so I didn’t waste any time and sat right on my husband’s lap. I tried to work him in, only to have things deflate on me.
    Before I realized how enraged he was, James had pushed me off him. My head smacked the coffee table on the way down. I rubbed my head and sucked in my tears. James towered over me, his pants undone and his face beet red. “Don’t you ever sneak up on me like that again, woman! You hear me? Never!”
    “ But James, I just wanted to make you happy.” I couldn’t help but sob when he yelled in my face like that. I felt like a child being corrected and I wasn’t sure what I’d done wrong. Even worse, his obvious ability to respond to the movie disturbed me, because as soon as I got near him and touched him, everything fizzled out.
    It has to be me , I thought as a new round of grief welled up within me. I sobbed into the carpet, prostrate. I just knew I disgusted him. He didn’t even know what I’d done and yet, he still despised me.
    Or maybe he had found someone else.
    Maybe he was cheating on me!
    The thought horrified me, until I realized how hypocritical that would be. Sucking in my tears, I stood and tried my best to look brave. I could handle this. I would.
    Besides, I doubt he had someone else. He always came home right after work. No detours, no mysterious errands or absences. But I still considered asking him, until I saw him shaking—no, trembling—as I peered from the corner of my eye.
    “ You want to…to make…me happy? Then…leave me alone, Hope. Just leave me alone.” James winced, then rubbed his face as he stormed from the room. He locked himself in the bathroom for a good half hour. While I waited, I