Read Online Finding Purgatory by Kristina M Sanchez - Free Book Online
Authors: Kristina M Sanchez
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sunshine, Tori felt a little more rational. She hated when anger got the best of her. Not that she minded the actual physical aftereffects of a fight—she’d definitely had worse than the dull ache at her ankle and the sore spot on her arm—but she was embarrassed.
Well, there wasn’t anything she could do about it now. Ariel had always gotten under her skin, and it had been a stressful weekend.
Tori wandered for a few minutes, not sure what she wanted to do with the next two and a half hours before Ani would be back to get her. The public library was a few blocks away. She had a library card because it had been easier to do her reports and research there than to take her chances with the Everett’s one computer. It had been a while since she’d checked her e-mail. She didn’t expect to have received anything, but it was a way to pass the time.
Almost as soon as she logged on to her Gmail, Tori regretted it. The message sitting right on top, sent on her birthday, was from the one person she’d been trying hardest not to think about.
Tori glared at the simple subject line while her heart twisted and her throat got tight. She moved the mouse, selected the message, and went to hit the delete button.
She hesitated.
And opened the e-mail.
From: Raphael Diego
To: Victoria Kane
Subject: Merry Birthday
Hey, Tor.
Can you believe today is finally here? I remember my eighteenth birthday. I was so damn impressed with myself. But you were there, weren’t you? Fifteen years old and looking at me like I was the biggest idiot for buying porn at the gas station when I had my own computer in my room. Who pays for porn? The guy who can do it legally for the first time, obviously. And cigarettes! I smoked the whole damn pack that first week in public places just because I could.
So here’s a little wisdom from an old man with three long years of experience with this adulthood thing:
1. People always told me that I shouldn’t be too eager to get out of high school, I’d just want to go back. People are stupid. Who in their right mind would want to go back to high school? I couldn’t stand being around teenagers even when I was one.
You are, as always, the exception.
2. Well, I don’t have a number two. Buying porn and cigarettes is overrated. Voting is pretty cool. Other than that, I don’t think I have anything figured out. But whatever. Not a lot of people do.
Anyway. I hope you’re doing something fun. Today I’m going to do what I said we would do together. You remember, I hope. If you come, cool. If not, well, I’m not going to say I understand, because I don’t. I really don’t.
I love you. I miss you.
The words blurred, and Tori’s eyes burned with tears she didn’t want to cry. She remembered planning what they would do together on her birthday and missed Raphe terribly in that moment.
Tori shook her longing away and growled at herself. It was stupid to think of him, stupid to think like that. Stupid was what got her where she—
Again, her thoughts shifted, and Tori gasped, her hand going to her mouth.
In all her thoughts about turning eighteen and being back at school when her life had changed entirely, she’d sort forgotten she was knocked up.
“Fuck,” she muttered loud enough to draw a glare from another patron. She made a face at the man but didn’t push it. She slunk down in her seat and rubbed her eyes.
No doubt about it, she sucked at this. Anxiety made her heart speed, and her throat was tight with shame. It was so stupid that God or science or whatever was responsible for procreation made it so any asshole could make one of these things. She was pretty sure the kid wasn’t going to survive the incubation process intact at this rate.
What kind of a stupid asshole forgot she was pregnant and got into a fight?
She blew out a shaky puff of air, trying to get herself together. Nine months. Less than that. She’d been with Raphe almost two
Well, there wasn’t anything she could do about it now. Ariel had always gotten under her skin, and it had been a stressful weekend.
Tori wandered for a few minutes, not sure what she wanted to do with the next two and a half hours before Ani would be back to get her. The public library was a few blocks away. She had a library card because it had been easier to do her reports and research there than to take her chances with the Everett’s one computer. It had been a while since she’d checked her e-mail. She didn’t expect to have received anything, but it was a way to pass the time.
Almost as soon as she logged on to her Gmail, Tori regretted it. The message sitting right on top, sent on her birthday, was from the one person she’d been trying hardest not to think about.
Tori glared at the simple subject line while her heart twisted and her throat got tight. She moved the mouse, selected the message, and went to hit the delete button.
She hesitated.
And opened the e-mail.
From: Raphael Diego
To: Victoria Kane
Subject: Merry Birthday
Hey, Tor.
Can you believe today is finally here? I remember my eighteenth birthday. I was so damn impressed with myself. But you were there, weren’t you? Fifteen years old and looking at me like I was the biggest idiot for buying porn at the gas station when I had my own computer in my room. Who pays for porn? The guy who can do it legally for the first time, obviously. And cigarettes! I smoked the whole damn pack that first week in public places just because I could.
So here’s a little wisdom from an old man with three long years of experience with this adulthood thing:
1. People always told me that I shouldn’t be too eager to get out of high school, I’d just want to go back. People are stupid. Who in their right mind would want to go back to high school? I couldn’t stand being around teenagers even when I was one.
You are, as always, the exception.
2. Well, I don’t have a number two. Buying porn and cigarettes is overrated. Voting is pretty cool. Other than that, I don’t think I have anything figured out. But whatever. Not a lot of people do.
Anyway. I hope you’re doing something fun. Today I’m going to do what I said we would do together. You remember, I hope. If you come, cool. If not, well, I’m not going to say I understand, because I don’t. I really don’t.
I love you. I miss you.
The words blurred, and Tori’s eyes burned with tears she didn’t want to cry. She remembered planning what they would do together on her birthday and missed Raphe terribly in that moment.
Tori shook her longing away and growled at herself. It was stupid to think of him, stupid to think like that. Stupid was what got her where she—
Again, her thoughts shifted, and Tori gasped, her hand going to her mouth.
In all her thoughts about turning eighteen and being back at school when her life had changed entirely, she’d sort forgotten she was knocked up.
“Fuck,” she muttered loud enough to draw a glare from another patron. She made a face at the man but didn’t push it. She slunk down in her seat and rubbed her eyes.
No doubt about it, she sucked at this. Anxiety made her heart speed, and her throat was tight with shame. It was so stupid that God or science or whatever was responsible for procreation made it so any asshole could make one of these things. She was pretty sure the kid wasn’t going to survive the incubation process intact at this rate.
What kind of a stupid asshole forgot she was pregnant and got into a fight?
She blew out a shaky puff of air, trying to get herself together. Nine months. Less than that. She’d been with Raphe almost two
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