Read Online An Idiot in Love (a laugh out loud comedy) by David Jester - Free Book Online Page B
Authors: David Jester
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it?
Too boring.
So, where do you live?
Too forward.
Do you want to go out with me?
Way too forward.
Lizzie, hey, I was waiting for you.
Too desperate.
I began to swing back and forth gently on the swing.
The sun had climbed the very tip of the horizon before I finally turned around. Lizzie wasn’t there. No one was.
A rustle in the trees had alerted me, but the wind -- picking up and fighting against the beautiful day -- was to blame. The smile had dripped from my face. The warmth had ebbed from my body. A light chill cut through me.
The sun was dipping down in the skies behind me; the wind was getting feisty with the trees. I gave up waiting for Lizzie and lurched solemnly back to the caravan.
I couldn’t hide my disappointment from my parents and they sensed something was wrong. I didn’t want to tell them, but before the night was out my dad figured things out.
‘Your girlfriend didn’t show, huh son?’
I shook my head, looking beyond him at the television where three unrecognisable actors swam amongst a mass of grey and black pixels.
‘Did she tell you she was going to be there?’
Again I shook my head. ‘Where else would she be?’ I asked him. ‘It’s the only place to go for kids on the resort.’
‘She could have spent the day on the pier. At the arcades. Shopping. Maybe her parents dragged her to the club or to a restaurant.’
I brightened up a little and turned to face him. ‘I never thought of that.’
‘Of course you didn’t. You head out to that park tomorrow and I’ll bet you’ll find your little friend waiting there for you.’
‘Okay,’ I said happily, ‘I will. Thanks Dad.’
For another night I went to bed happy, and for another morning I woke up excited to get out of the house.
I rushed to the park again, found my spot, nestled into the sun-drenched sky and waited.
She didn’t show.
I waited the next day and the next. Lizzie didn’t show at all.
I stopped off at the park every day during the two week holiday, but Lizzie, the little girl who had won my heart and the first girl I had ever fallen for, never showed up.
4
Teenage Dreams Part One: Katie
I thought that the feelings I had for Lizzie would open up doors for me. I expected that my return to school would be a return to a world of new opportunities, a world where I adored the opposite sex, had multitudes of crushes and perhaps, eventually, got myself a girlfriend.
It didn’t happen.
I returned to see the same faces on the same girls I had known since nursery school. They didn’t appeal to me. My short lived adoration of the opposite sex stagnated.
Then, in middle school, the doors didn’t just open, they imploded in a sticky mess of hormones and desire.
First there was Katie. She lived a few miles away and had gone to a different primary school. I first laid eyes on her during the very first day of
Too boring.
So, where do you live?
Too forward.
Do you want to go out with me?
Way too forward.
Lizzie, hey, I was waiting for you.
Too desperate.
I began to swing back and forth gently on the swing.
The sun had climbed the very tip of the horizon before I finally turned around. Lizzie wasn’t there. No one was.
A rustle in the trees had alerted me, but the wind -- picking up and fighting against the beautiful day -- was to blame. The smile had dripped from my face. The warmth had ebbed from my body. A light chill cut through me.
The sun was dipping down in the skies behind me; the wind was getting feisty with the trees. I gave up waiting for Lizzie and lurched solemnly back to the caravan.
I couldn’t hide my disappointment from my parents and they sensed something was wrong. I didn’t want to tell them, but before the night was out my dad figured things out.
‘Your girlfriend didn’t show, huh son?’
I shook my head, looking beyond him at the television where three unrecognisable actors swam amongst a mass of grey and black pixels.
‘Did she tell you she was going to be there?’
Again I shook my head. ‘Where else would she be?’ I asked him. ‘It’s the only place to go for kids on the resort.’
‘She could have spent the day on the pier. At the arcades. Shopping. Maybe her parents dragged her to the club or to a restaurant.’
I brightened up a little and turned to face him. ‘I never thought of that.’
‘Of course you didn’t. You head out to that park tomorrow and I’ll bet you’ll find your little friend waiting there for you.’
‘Okay,’ I said happily, ‘I will. Thanks Dad.’
For another night I went to bed happy, and for another morning I woke up excited to get out of the house.
I rushed to the park again, found my spot, nestled into the sun-drenched sky and waited.
She didn’t show.
I waited the next day and the next. Lizzie didn’t show at all.
I stopped off at the park every day during the two week holiday, but Lizzie, the little girl who had won my heart and the first girl I had ever fallen for, never showed up.
4
Teenage Dreams Part One: Katie
I thought that the feelings I had for Lizzie would open up doors for me. I expected that my return to school would be a return to a world of new opportunities, a world where I adored the opposite sex, had multitudes of crushes and perhaps, eventually, got myself a girlfriend.
It didn’t happen.
I returned to see the same faces on the same girls I had known since nursery school. They didn’t appeal to me. My short lived adoration of the opposite sex stagnated.
Then, in middle school, the doors didn’t just open, they imploded in a sticky mess of hormones and desire.
First there was Katie. She lived a few miles away and had gone to a different primary school. I first laid eyes on her during the very first day of
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