Read Online To Say Goodbye by Lindsay Detwiler - Free Book Online

ice queen who felt nothing for him.
    “Me too. I wish I didn’t have to give you any visitation rights. If I had my way, you’d be gone from his life. But I don’t. So just be sure you don’t screw up. Because if I hear you were drunk around our son, it’s done.”
    “Chloe, I won’t. I love him. You know why I turned to the bottle.”
    “So it’s my fault?”
    “Let’s not do this again, okay?”
    “You made your choice.”
    “And you made yours. Need I remind you I came home to be with you, and you had been cheating on me?”
    Chloe rolled her eyes and stomped away. Jackson closed his eyes and reminded himself to breathe.
    It was so hard to imagine a time they had been in love, a time their relationship had been sparkling with hopes and dreams. How could love turn so cold so quickly?
    It pained him they were at this point. It wasn’t because he still loved her. Sure, a piece of him would always remember, would always love the woman he’d fallen for when they first met. But the fantasy was gone now. What devastated him was the hostility and how it was affecting Logan. He didn’t want that.
    He wished Chloe could understand it was a mistake. He hadn’t meant to become a bad role model. It’d happened without warning. He’d been at such a low place, a place he thought was impossible.
    I can’t go back, he thought as he climbed into the driver seat. Looking in the rearview mirror, he saw Logan talking to his stuffed dinosaur.
    No matter how much Chloe took away from him, no matter how little time he had with his son, he wouldn’t mess it up. He would be the kind of father Logan would idolize, would look up to, even if it was only two weekends a month.
    _______________
    “That was fun, Daddy! Dinosaurs! Rawrr,” Logan shouted, squeezing Jackson’s hand as they left the theater that afternoon. Logan was skipping, holding his dinosaur in his other arm.
    They’d gone to see the latest animated dinosaur movie, the one Logan had been talking about. Jackson had planned this for weeks, couldn’t wait to see his son’s face, couldn’t wait to see the amazement in his eyes.
    But after they bought their popcorn and sodas and found seats, after the previews were over and the movie started, Jackson’s heart was stabbed again.
    “Daddy took me to see this,” Logan mumbled, looking at Jackson. “I sawed it.”
    “No buddy, we talked about seeing it on the way here. We haven’t seen it.”
    “Yuh-huh. Me and Mommy and Daddy sawed it yesterday.”
    Jackson froze.
    His anger seethed. He balled his fist in his hand, clenching his jaw.
    He’d told Chloe he wanted to take Logan to see the movie.
    So she’d taken Logan with Seth yesterday apparently.
    Then his anger pressurized. He realized Logan had called Seth Daddy. Just like he’d suspected. He’d have to fight to stay in Logan’s life.
    He sighed, exhaling. Let it go. It doesn’t matter. Breathe.
    “Well, buddy, did you like the movie? Do you want to see it again?”
    Just then, the dinosaur ran across the screen, causing a cascade of giggles from the kids around them. Logan looked at the screen and laughed too.
    He was entranced. Obviously, the answer was yes.
    Jackson tried to let the hurt roll off him, tried to wash it down with soda and popcorn butter. It was hard to know Logan was slipping away, a replacement daddy waiting in the wings. It was impossible to be okay with some strange man, some man who had stolen his wife, now stealing the most important thing to him.
    As the weekend rolled on and their bi-weekly goodbye inched closer, Jackson felt his life floating into thin air. The gloom of the days without Logan crept back in, and the old Jackson seemed to be coming back.
    “Daddy, why you no live with me anymore?” Logan asked Saturday night when Jackson tucked him in—at nine o’clock. Screw Chloe’s bedtime orders.
    “Well, buddy. Things are complicated right now. I want to spend more time with you. I do. I love you.” Jackson hugged