Read Online The Utterly Uninteresting and Unadventurous Tales of Fred, the Vampire Accountant by Drew Hayes - Free Book Online
Authors: Drew Hayes
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couldn’t see us. Adding to the oddness, they all clearly noticed us and wanted to know what was going on, but had to pretend we were invisible.
It was like embarrassment and stupidity, compacted. To their credit, not one person broke character and approached us, and we moved past the majority of the players into a more open area on the north side of the park. From there we could see Emperor Nikolai speaking in hushed tones to some of the other players. One of them was the person with the Charlie Brown ghost costume, and one looked to be wearing a werewolf mask, so they were pretty obvious. The other two I recognized even more easily, though. They were Albert the Henchman and my own dear Sunny the Succubus.
I briefly wondered why she was a part of the little pow-wow, but I guessed it made sense. If you need to investigate, why not go right to the top?
None of that changed the plan, though. Lord Drake had known that Emperor Nikolai would be speaking to a few delegates at a time, with only his servant Albert as protection. I wasn’t sure what kind of monster Albert was, and I hadn’t had a chance to ask, but Lord Drake seemed pretty certain we would be able to overpower him easily. The goal here was for us to creep up on the separated few and spring into action. Each of us was supposed to do battle with one of the delegates, while Lord Drake and two of his servants took down the emperor. That way the “kill” would be assigned to Lord Drake and he would then have cause to lobby that he should be the new emperor. New emperor means he makes the rules, which means no more hiding from the humans, and yada yada yada.
The main point I had gleaned from all of that was I needed to pick a person and play rock-paper-scissors with them. Either they won, or I did. After that none of this was my problem anymore, and hopefully Krystal was ready to go.
We resumed our skulking, moving delicately, yet purposefully, toward our soon-to-be-deposed emperor. Lord Drake, Maria, and another girl broke off to circle around toward the rear where the emperor was located. The rest of us continued creeping up on our targets. Since I was near her side anyway, I locked my vision on Krystal and decided to “battle” her. I think it was because I was focused only on her that I noticed the quick gesture she made, scratching the top of her nose with her thumb. I had only an instant to ponder why she would use a thumb instead of a finger, when strange words rang through the air.
“ Ectorim Novendum, Bicradalio . ” It was Neil’s voice, and it rang out with authority and power, more than I would have ever thought the kid capable of. When he spoke again, it was somewhat less impressive.
“As you have all noticed, you are now frozen in place thanks to my spell,” Emperor Nikolai said, closing the large black tome he had obviously read from and handing it to Albert. “None of you have applicable immunities or resistances, and yes, we are quite aware that you Revivalists are here. Your camouflage power was dispelled the moment I froze you.”
There was a ripple of gasping and shock from our vampires as well as nearby players.
“I’d suspected for some time you might try an uprising, so I took necessary precautions,” he continued. At this point Krystal, or I should say Sunny , bounced over and stood smiling dumbly as he slipped an arm around her. “My new consort here is a succubus, and as most of you should know, they possess the ability to see past all veils and illusions.”
Emperor Nikolai released his grip on Sunny and walked over to Lord Drake, who, to his credit, was remaining stock still, and leaned into Drake’s face. “So, the great Lord Drake reduced to nothing more than a mere mannequin. How elegantly pathetic. You underestimated me Drake; you thought that just because I was genetically a human I would go down easy. After all, what possible threat can a mere mage be?” Emperor Nikolai stepped back from Drake and walked back
It was like embarrassment and stupidity, compacted. To their credit, not one person broke character and approached us, and we moved past the majority of the players into a more open area on the north side of the park. From there we could see Emperor Nikolai speaking in hushed tones to some of the other players. One of them was the person with the Charlie Brown ghost costume, and one looked to be wearing a werewolf mask, so they were pretty obvious. The other two I recognized even more easily, though. They were Albert the Henchman and my own dear Sunny the Succubus.
I briefly wondered why she was a part of the little pow-wow, but I guessed it made sense. If you need to investigate, why not go right to the top?
None of that changed the plan, though. Lord Drake had known that Emperor Nikolai would be speaking to a few delegates at a time, with only his servant Albert as protection. I wasn’t sure what kind of monster Albert was, and I hadn’t had a chance to ask, but Lord Drake seemed pretty certain we would be able to overpower him easily. The goal here was for us to creep up on the separated few and spring into action. Each of us was supposed to do battle with one of the delegates, while Lord Drake and two of his servants took down the emperor. That way the “kill” would be assigned to Lord Drake and he would then have cause to lobby that he should be the new emperor. New emperor means he makes the rules, which means no more hiding from the humans, and yada yada yada.
The main point I had gleaned from all of that was I needed to pick a person and play rock-paper-scissors with them. Either they won, or I did. After that none of this was my problem anymore, and hopefully Krystal was ready to go.
We resumed our skulking, moving delicately, yet purposefully, toward our soon-to-be-deposed emperor. Lord Drake, Maria, and another girl broke off to circle around toward the rear where the emperor was located. The rest of us continued creeping up on our targets. Since I was near her side anyway, I locked my vision on Krystal and decided to “battle” her. I think it was because I was focused only on her that I noticed the quick gesture she made, scratching the top of her nose with her thumb. I had only an instant to ponder why she would use a thumb instead of a finger, when strange words rang through the air.
“ Ectorim Novendum, Bicradalio . ” It was Neil’s voice, and it rang out with authority and power, more than I would have ever thought the kid capable of. When he spoke again, it was somewhat less impressive.
“As you have all noticed, you are now frozen in place thanks to my spell,” Emperor Nikolai said, closing the large black tome he had obviously read from and handing it to Albert. “None of you have applicable immunities or resistances, and yes, we are quite aware that you Revivalists are here. Your camouflage power was dispelled the moment I froze you.”
There was a ripple of gasping and shock from our vampires as well as nearby players.
“I’d suspected for some time you might try an uprising, so I took necessary precautions,” he continued. At this point Krystal, or I should say Sunny , bounced over and stood smiling dumbly as he slipped an arm around her. “My new consort here is a succubus, and as most of you should know, they possess the ability to see past all veils and illusions.”
Emperor Nikolai released his grip on Sunny and walked over to Lord Drake, who, to his credit, was remaining stock still, and leaned into Drake’s face. “So, the great Lord Drake reduced to nothing more than a mere mannequin. How elegantly pathetic. You underestimated me Drake; you thought that just because I was genetically a human I would go down easy. After all, what possible threat can a mere mage be?” Emperor Nikolai stepped back from Drake and walked back
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