Read Online The Taming of Lilah May by Vanessa Curtis - Free Book Online

red mouth.
    Is this hideous day ever going to end?

    Adam walks me home after school.
    â€˜So I guess we can stay mates, right?’ I say in a nervous voice.
    I’m trying hard not to upset him or be angry.
    â€˜For now,’ says Adam. ‘See how things go, yeah?’
    That’s kind of fair, so I stick out my hand in a businesslike way and he gives a snort of laughter and then shakes it.
    â€˜Seriously, though, Lilah,’ he says. ‘Have you ever thought of seeing somebody?’
    â€˜What – you mean a date?’ I say, confused.
    Adam sighs.
    â€˜I mean about your anger,’ he says. ‘There must be people who can help you.’
    It’s my turn to sigh. In the weeks and months after Jay disappeared a whole army of do-gooding counsellors and therapists descended on our little house after my mum got it in her head that I was having some sort of breakdown, and despite their best efforts to make me talk and ‘let it all out’, I refused to speak to any of them.
    â€˜No good,’ I say. ‘Been there, bought the T-shirt, worn the T-shirt, ripped it off and sent it to Oxfam.’
    Adam gives another snort.
    â€˜You’re mental, May,’ he says. ‘But I think that’s why I like you.’
    I smile, but I’m thinking about what he said about getting help.
    The thing is, I know that there’s only onething that will help me stop being angry.
    And that one thing just never seems to happen.
    I need Jay to come home.
    But even if he did . . . would he ever forgive me?

CHAPTER ELEVEN
    Jay’s losing weight.
    He says it’s because he’s not been bothering to eat anything much at band practice, and it’s true, when I once went to watch them rehearse, they spent the whole evening existing on cans of lager and a bag of red liquorice.
    But Mum’s getting a bit worried about him.
    â€˜He doesn’t talk to me any more,’ she says to me when we’re washing up together at the sink. ‘Andwhen he does, it’s only in words of one syllable.’
    I scrunch my tea towel into a glass and squeak it around inside until it’s smudge-free and shiny.
    â€˜Maybe he’s just being a typical teenage boy?’ I offer. ‘And to be fair, Mum, you’re not exactly here very much, are you?’
    Mum flushes, and turns back to her washing-up.
    â€˜You’re too young to know what you’re talking about,’ she snaps. ‘Somebody has to pay the bills around here.’
    I shrink away from her. I’m only twelve, going on thirteen. And I wasn’t at all moody or angry back in those days. I was a sunny child, or so my parents were always saying.
    â€˜She’s got a lovely sunny nature, our Lilah,’ they’d say to anybody within earshot, and then whoever it was would turn around and stare at me with a sort of bemused fondness, and I’d go all embarrassed and squirmy.
    â€˜I don’t know,’ sighs Mum. ‘You never know how your children are going to turn out. I mean, you’re no trouble. Not yet. But Jay was a lovely little boy. Really sweet. And now he just bites my head off if I ask him a question.’
    I carry on wiping the plates dry and I don’tsay anything, but I’m thinking that I actually know exactly how Mum is feeling, because Jay’s started being a bit weird with me too. And my brother being snappy with me is the most horrid and unexpected thing that’s ever happened, and it’s too upsetting to talk about, so I just carry it around inside me like a big, mould-covered, heavy lump of rock that won’t go away.
    â€˜Go and talk to him, Lilah,’ says Mum. ‘I can finish the drying-up. He always seems to prefer talking to you.’
    She doesn’t sound bitter when she says this, just a little lost and wistful.
    I don’t really want to go and disturb Jay and risk getting snapped at, but I’m still at that age where I obey my