Read Online Somebody Love Me (Journeys) by Michelle Sutton - Free Book Online
Authors: Michelle Sutton
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talking to me because Cathy was still mad about Dave hitting on me, and Mary didn't want to set her sister off. Or so her step-sisters had said. The first time I went to hang out and spend the night at their new place, their brother was there. Apparently their mom had gone out of town, so they had the house to themselves.
He gazed at me with a hungry look in his eyes and said, "Hey, it's been awhile."
"It has." Glancing at Margie and Sharon with a questioning gaze, I hoped to find out what they'd planned for the overnighter, but they both avoided eye contact with me. Not a good sign, and something was definitely up.
Margie said hastily, "Clay I need to borrow your car. Sharon and I need to get a few things at the store. How about you stay here and get reacquainted with Missy?"
"Sounds good to me," Clay responded, his gaze fixed on mine.
I shrugged and sat beside him on the couch. "I guess I'll stay here then."
The moment we were alone my palms grew sweaty. He didn't have to say anything for me to know what he had in mind for entertainment. I could practically hear him panting beside me, but he kept his distance. Part of me liked the fact he wanted to be with me so much that he practically hyperventilated, and the terrified part of me wanted to split right out of there and take cover.
"I brought something." He glanced at me, his face turning a shade of pink as he held out his hand to show me a square packet.
It said Trojan on the outside of the wrapper. The content confirmed my worries, but a part of me wanted to see if it was possible to get past the fear of what happened with Dirk. I couldn't help feeling conflicted about my options. But he seemed like a decent guy, and from what I could tell he was almost as nervous as I was.
At least I knew his sisters were decent people. Unlike Mary and Cathy, Margie and Sharon didn't drink, smoke, or have sex. Yet they still seemed cool.
"How long do you think they'll be gone?" I glanced up at his eager face hoping he'd say not long, but hearing, "Long enough," instead.
My body stiffened and I stared into his eyes. No malice lingered, only a boyish hunger, and something that resembled anxiety. The crease in his forehead and the slight moisture on his skin told me that much.
Though not sure how long we sat in silence studying each other, Clay finally ended it by leaning close and covering my mouth with his. I responded and kissed him back. The lazy caress of his kisses pulled me into the "no going back" zone. Since our last meeting he'd somehow gotten better at kissing. He grabbed my hand and stood.
His lids were heavy, and he smiled as if to reassure me things would be okay. We went into the bedroom and I came out about thirty minutes later wondering what I'd been so afraid of. It hadn't hurt at all. In fact, it felt pretty good. The only thing that worried me was he used the same condom twice and it broke the second time. I was pretty sure that meant I could get pregnant, but I sure hoped I was wrong. From what I could tell he seemed a bit worried about that, too, though he didn't say anything at first.
Finally, after several minutes of silence, he spoke.
"I didn't think it would break," he said as his gaze darted around. "I hope you're on the pill. You are on the pill, right?"
His worried gaze captured mine, and I couldn't lie to him. "No. I've not had a reason to get on the pill."
"You really need to do that. In case this happens again."
I swallowed hard, not sure I wanted it to happen again. It wasn't all that great. It felt good, don't get me wrong, but Clay was a bit small and it wasn't nearly as amazing as I'd thought it would be. Then again, I didn't have feelings for Clay. Didn't I tell myself I'd wait until I had feelings for a guy to sleep with him? What a letdown.
A few minutes later the step-sisters returned. Margie and Sharon both glanced over at Clay who gave them a slight nod. Then they glanced at me and things got awkward between us really fast.
"So
He gazed at me with a hungry look in his eyes and said, "Hey, it's been awhile."
"It has." Glancing at Margie and Sharon with a questioning gaze, I hoped to find out what they'd planned for the overnighter, but they both avoided eye contact with me. Not a good sign, and something was definitely up.
Margie said hastily, "Clay I need to borrow your car. Sharon and I need to get a few things at the store. How about you stay here and get reacquainted with Missy?"
"Sounds good to me," Clay responded, his gaze fixed on mine.
I shrugged and sat beside him on the couch. "I guess I'll stay here then."
The moment we were alone my palms grew sweaty. He didn't have to say anything for me to know what he had in mind for entertainment. I could practically hear him panting beside me, but he kept his distance. Part of me liked the fact he wanted to be with me so much that he practically hyperventilated, and the terrified part of me wanted to split right out of there and take cover.
"I brought something." He glanced at me, his face turning a shade of pink as he held out his hand to show me a square packet.
It said Trojan on the outside of the wrapper. The content confirmed my worries, but a part of me wanted to see if it was possible to get past the fear of what happened with Dirk. I couldn't help feeling conflicted about my options. But he seemed like a decent guy, and from what I could tell he was almost as nervous as I was.
At least I knew his sisters were decent people. Unlike Mary and Cathy, Margie and Sharon didn't drink, smoke, or have sex. Yet they still seemed cool.
"How long do you think they'll be gone?" I glanced up at his eager face hoping he'd say not long, but hearing, "Long enough," instead.
My body stiffened and I stared into his eyes. No malice lingered, only a boyish hunger, and something that resembled anxiety. The crease in his forehead and the slight moisture on his skin told me that much.
Though not sure how long we sat in silence studying each other, Clay finally ended it by leaning close and covering my mouth with his. I responded and kissed him back. The lazy caress of his kisses pulled me into the "no going back" zone. Since our last meeting he'd somehow gotten better at kissing. He grabbed my hand and stood.
His lids were heavy, and he smiled as if to reassure me things would be okay. We went into the bedroom and I came out about thirty minutes later wondering what I'd been so afraid of. It hadn't hurt at all. In fact, it felt pretty good. The only thing that worried me was he used the same condom twice and it broke the second time. I was pretty sure that meant I could get pregnant, but I sure hoped I was wrong. From what I could tell he seemed a bit worried about that, too, though he didn't say anything at first.
Finally, after several minutes of silence, he spoke.
"I didn't think it would break," he said as his gaze darted around. "I hope you're on the pill. You are on the pill, right?"
His worried gaze captured mine, and I couldn't lie to him. "No. I've not had a reason to get on the pill."
"You really need to do that. In case this happens again."
I swallowed hard, not sure I wanted it to happen again. It wasn't all that great. It felt good, don't get me wrong, but Clay was a bit small and it wasn't nearly as amazing as I'd thought it would be. Then again, I didn't have feelings for Clay. Didn't I tell myself I'd wait until I had feelings for a guy to sleep with him? What a letdown.
A few minutes later the step-sisters returned. Margie and Sharon both glanced over at Clay who gave them a slight nod. Then they glanced at me and things got awkward between us really fast.
"So
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