what did you guys buy?" I tried to act unflustered despite the fact I had no doubt they were aware I'd just had sex with their brother.
Margie and Sharon gestured for me to follow them into the kitchen. Clay followed us and glanced at me several times from the corner of his eye. I tried to act natural, like I hadn't been intimate with him, but it was hard to pull off. Finally I couldn't stand it anymore and said, "I can't do this. Can someone give me a ride home?"
Margie glanced at Clay. He said, "You can use my car."
I closed my eyes, relieved he wouldn't be the one driving. "Thank you."
We drove in silence, and after pulling into my driveway Margie said, "You don't want to see him again, do you?"
I shook my head to indicate no. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have."
"No. It's okay. He'll understand."
Glancing at my friend, I blinked my surprise. "Really."
"Sure. Yeah. He'll be fine."
"Okay. Um, thanks." I opened the car door and climbed out. I didn't plan to return to their home. It wouldn't feel right. So I entered my house and walked right past my mother, climbed the stairs two at a time to my bedroom, and once inside, I flopped down hard on my bed, and I cried.
*****
The following month I avoided all of my crazy friends. I went to school every day and stayed home on the weekends. I prayed each night before bed that my period would come. When it finally arrived, I nearly fell apart and sobbed with relief. I couldn't chance that scare again. I needed to get on the pill.
My father sat at the dining room table eating eggs and bacon the morning I finally got up the nerve to ask him for help. Not used to seeing him at home on a Saturday morning, I asked, "Why are you here?"
Dad offered me a wry grin and asked, "Do you want me to leave?"
Shaking my head, I sat at the table beside him and said, "I need to go to the Family Planning clinic downtown. I hear they can give out free prescriptions for the pill, and I need it. My cramps keep getting worse and they're so wicked painful I can't stand it anymore." I clutched my abdomen to emphasize that point.
My father stared at me a moment and said, "I'll take you today if they're open."
"I think so. Let me check." I proceeded to look up the clinic information in the Yellow Pages with trembling hands. My father was actually agreeing to take me to get on the pill? Unbelievable. But I appreciated it. Hopefully he wouldn't figure out there was another reason for my sudden need.
Thankfully, the hours were posted in the ad in the phone book. They were open on Saturdays from noon to five. "They open at noon. Is that time going to work?"
"I'm off today, so yes, after lunch we'll head downtown. Okay?"
"Sure." I licked my lips and entered the kitchen. My mom slaved over the stove as usual. "Can I have some breakfast too?"
"Of course." My mother studied me a moment as she handed me a plate of food.
I avoided her gaze and received it. "Thanks."
After devouring my breakfast, I went up to my room and changed my clothes. My dad was actually taking me to the clinic so I could get on the pill. It seemed too good to be true. But when I saw him at the bottom of the stairs jiggling his keys, I knew he meant to get my attention for another reason. "Dad, it's only ten."
"I know, but I wanted to buy my girl something for Christmas. I need your help."
Not sure why my dad always referred to my mom as "my girl," I almost refused him. But the pleading look in his eyes told me that would hurt his feelings, and he was doing me a favor. So I said, "Sure."
As we drove to the mall before heading downtown, I wanted to make small talk with him, but couldn't come up with something to say that would be neutral enough to work for both of us.
Finally my dad said, "Jenny has been asking about you. She and her boyfriend broke up and she said you might know something about it."
"When did this happen?" I swallowed the bile rising in my throat.
"A few days ago. Apparently she'd gotten pregnant and he
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