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Authors: Vikas Swarup
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me. He looks at the lifeless body of Father Timothy and begins crying too. We hold hands and cry together for almost three hours, even after the police jeep with the flashing red light comes, even after the doctor in a white coat arrives with an ambulance, even after they cover the bodies with white cloth, even after they cart away the corpses in the ambulance, even after Joseph and Mrs Gonzalves take us away to the house and try their best to comfort us.
Later, much later, Ian asks me, 'Why did you cry so much, Thomas?'
'Because today I have really become an orphan,' I reply. 'He was my father. Just as he was Father to all those who came to this church. But why were you crying? Is it because of what you did with Father John?'
'No, I was crying because I have lost everything too. I have become an orphan like you.'
'But your father is alive. He is in Dehradun,' I cry.
'No, that was a lie.' He begins sobbing again. 'Now I can tell you the truth. Timothy Francis may have been your Father, but he was my dad.'
* * *
Smita has a sad expression on her face. 'What a tragic story,' she says. 'I now understand what Father Timothy must have meant when he spoke of the burden of a priest. It is amazing how he lived a double life all those years, as a priest who was also secretly a married man and a father.
So what happened to Ian, finally?'
'I don't know. He went back to England. To some uncle, I think.'
'And you?'
'I got sent to a Juvenile Home.'
'I see. Now tell me about the second question,' says Smita and presses 'Play' on the remote.
* * *
We are still in the commercial break.
Prem Kumar leans forward and whispers to me, 'Let me tell you what the next question is going to be. I will ask you what FBI stands for. You have heard of this organization, haven't you?'
'No.' I shake my head.
He grimaces. 'I knew it. Look, we would like you to win at least a little more money. I can change the question for something else. Tell me quickly, are there any abbreviations you are familiar with?'
I think for a while before replying. 'I don't know about FBI, but I know INRL.'
'What's that?'
'It's what's written on top of a cross.'
'Oh! OK, let me check my data bank.'
The commercial break ends. The signature tune comes on.
Prem Kumar turns to me. 'I am curious, Mr Ram Mohammad Thomas, as to your religion. You
seem to have all the religions in your name. Tell me, where do you go to pray?'
'Does one have to go to a temple or a church or a mosque to pray? I believe in what Kabir says.
Hari is in the East, Allah is in the West. Look within your heart, and there you will find both Ram and Karim.'
'Very well said, Mr Thomas. It looks like you are an expert on all religions. And if that is the case, the next question should be fairly easy for you. OK, here it comes, question number two for two thousand rupees. What is the sequence of letters normally inscribed on a cross? Is it a) IRNI, b) INRI, c) RINI or d) NIRI? Is the question clear, Mr Thomas?'
'Yes,' I reply.
'OK. Then let's hear your reply.'
The answer is B. INRI.'
'Are you absolutely, one hundred per cent sure?'
'Yes.'
There is a crescendo of drums. The correct answer flashes. 'Absolutely, one hundred per cent correct! You have just won two thousand rupees.'
'Amen,' I say.
A BROTHER'S PROMISE
You should take a good look at all sides of an issue before making a decision. Put
something away in case of an emergency. New neighbours will bring good cheer.
A small problem may occur at home base, but you will solve it quickly and
correctly. Don't offer smart advice unless you are really asked to comment.
This is what the daily horoscope in the Maharashtra Times has predicted today for those who are Capricorns like me, born in the last week of December.
I don't read the Maharashtra Times. In fact, I don't read any newspaper. But I occasionally pilfer a copy from Mr Barve's rubbish bin. It is useful for stoking the fire in the kitchen, and sometimes, when I have
Later, much later, Ian asks me, 'Why did you cry so much, Thomas?'
'Because today I have really become an orphan,' I reply. 'He was my father. Just as he was Father to all those who came to this church. But why were you crying? Is it because of what you did with Father John?'
'No, I was crying because I have lost everything too. I have become an orphan like you.'
'But your father is alive. He is in Dehradun,' I cry.
'No, that was a lie.' He begins sobbing again. 'Now I can tell you the truth. Timothy Francis may have been your Father, but he was my dad.'
* * *
Smita has a sad expression on her face. 'What a tragic story,' she says. 'I now understand what Father Timothy must have meant when he spoke of the burden of a priest. It is amazing how he lived a double life all those years, as a priest who was also secretly a married man and a father.
So what happened to Ian, finally?'
'I don't know. He went back to England. To some uncle, I think.'
'And you?'
'I got sent to a Juvenile Home.'
'I see. Now tell me about the second question,' says Smita and presses 'Play' on the remote.
* * *
We are still in the commercial break.
Prem Kumar leans forward and whispers to me, 'Let me tell you what the next question is going to be. I will ask you what FBI stands for. You have heard of this organization, haven't you?'
'No.' I shake my head.
He grimaces. 'I knew it. Look, we would like you to win at least a little more money. I can change the question for something else. Tell me quickly, are there any abbreviations you are familiar with?'
I think for a while before replying. 'I don't know about FBI, but I know INRL.'
'What's that?'
'It's what's written on top of a cross.'
'Oh! OK, let me check my data bank.'
The commercial break ends. The signature tune comes on.
Prem Kumar turns to me. 'I am curious, Mr Ram Mohammad Thomas, as to your religion. You
seem to have all the religions in your name. Tell me, where do you go to pray?'
'Does one have to go to a temple or a church or a mosque to pray? I believe in what Kabir says.
Hari is in the East, Allah is in the West. Look within your heart, and there you will find both Ram and Karim.'
'Very well said, Mr Thomas. It looks like you are an expert on all religions. And if that is the case, the next question should be fairly easy for you. OK, here it comes, question number two for two thousand rupees. What is the sequence of letters normally inscribed on a cross? Is it a) IRNI, b) INRI, c) RINI or d) NIRI? Is the question clear, Mr Thomas?'
'Yes,' I reply.
'OK. Then let's hear your reply.'
The answer is B. INRI.'
'Are you absolutely, one hundred per cent sure?'
'Yes.'
There is a crescendo of drums. The correct answer flashes. 'Absolutely, one hundred per cent correct! You have just won two thousand rupees.'
'Amen,' I say.
A BROTHER'S PROMISE
You should take a good look at all sides of an issue before making a decision. Put
something away in case of an emergency. New neighbours will bring good cheer.
A small problem may occur at home base, but you will solve it quickly and
correctly. Don't offer smart advice unless you are really asked to comment.
This is what the daily horoscope in the Maharashtra Times has predicted today for those who are Capricorns like me, born in the last week of December.
I don't read the Maharashtra Times. In fact, I don't read any newspaper. But I occasionally pilfer a copy from Mr Barve's rubbish bin. It is useful for stoking the fire in the kitchen, and sometimes, when I have
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