Read Online Out Of Bounds (Balls To The Walls) by Lolah Lace - Free Book Online Page B
Authors: Lolah Lace
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anyway possible.
Why do I feel this way? I have a sunk so low? My desperation is disgusting. Why do I still care about the woman that ripped my heart out and fed it to the sharks? I’m going to need therapy after it’s all said and done. But will it ever be all said and done? Seeing her with my child will be painful for me. I refuse to be the only one in pain.
I wish I could take back so many things. But would it have made the difference? I keep asking myself that very question. Would she be my wife instead of his?
While I thought about my utter despair and the shabby man I had become, Kari walked out of her job. She didn’t look all that pregnant. If she aborted my child I will kill her. She was wearing a big coat so maybe the coat was masking her pregnant belly.
Kari noti ced me as she approached her truck. She was driving Mason’s Range Rover. I wonder what happened to the Camry. I couldn’t get her to get rid of that car and looks like he did. She rolled her eyes at me and I felt so out of my element by coming here.
I quickly stepped out of my car and slammed the door. I made a bash over to her before she got into the truck and backed out of her parking spot.
“What are you doing here Jack?” Her tone was one of pure indignation.
“I needed to see you. You haven’t returned any of my calls.”
“I have been busy Jack.” Kari rolled her eyes at me again. I hated to see her like this.
“I just wanted to make sure you were okay.”
Kari smacked her lips. “Really?”
“Yes really. Is the baby okay?”
“Yes, my baby is doing just fine.”
My baby? I let her get away with that one. “That’s good. I didn’t have any way of knowing. I would like to go to the doctor’s visits with you. I want to help in any way that I can.”
She was being hostile toward me and I hadn’t done a thing to her but talk. She left me humiliated and confused. I wasn’t the bad guy but she was treating me as such.
“Jack what do you want?”
“I told you that already. I was seeing if you were okay. By the way I found a place to stay. I’m going to be out of your house soon.”
“Great.” She balked.
I took a step toward her. “Hey, I haven’t done anything to you. I don’t deserve to be spoken to like I’ve done something. I’m the victim here.”
“You haven’t left my house. That’ s something.”
“I just told you I was leaving. I will be gone within the week.”
“Jack , why make this hard?”
“ This is hard for you? That’s rich. I haven’t done anything. You screwed me over.”
“I’m pregnant. I’m tired. I don’t have the time or the energy for a fight.”
“I didn’t come here to fight. I came here to see if you were okay. I was worried. I don’t know where you are or what you’re doing. You’re pregnant so I’m concerned.”
“Fine , you’re concerned. You need to pack up your stuff and leave me alone. Stop calling me. Don’t show up at my job anymore.”
I felt tears forming behind my eyelids. It took great strength to hold them at bay. “You are carrying my child. I am worried. You made these problems, not me. All I did was love you and I tried to give you everything you wanted. You wanted to be married so I tried to give you that. You wanted another child so I tried to give you that. Where did I go wrong? When did you start to hate me?”
“Jack, I don’t hate you. I don’t hate anyone. I’m married now to another man. I can’t hang out with you. I can’t have conversations with you. We can’t see each other anymore. I have to cut ties with you. You have to cut all ties with me. You should want to cut all ties with me.”
“I can’t do that. You’re carrying my child. I would love to tell you to piss off but that’s not really an option for me at this point. There’s a baby on the way.”
“Jack give me a break. I fucked up but shit I can’t apologize enough. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry I hurt you but what do you want from me? I
Why do I feel this way? I have a sunk so low? My desperation is disgusting. Why do I still care about the woman that ripped my heart out and fed it to the sharks? I’m going to need therapy after it’s all said and done. But will it ever be all said and done? Seeing her with my child will be painful for me. I refuse to be the only one in pain.
I wish I could take back so many things. But would it have made the difference? I keep asking myself that very question. Would she be my wife instead of his?
While I thought about my utter despair and the shabby man I had become, Kari walked out of her job. She didn’t look all that pregnant. If she aborted my child I will kill her. She was wearing a big coat so maybe the coat was masking her pregnant belly.
Kari noti ced me as she approached her truck. She was driving Mason’s Range Rover. I wonder what happened to the Camry. I couldn’t get her to get rid of that car and looks like he did. She rolled her eyes at me and I felt so out of my element by coming here.
I quickly stepped out of my car and slammed the door. I made a bash over to her before she got into the truck and backed out of her parking spot.
“What are you doing here Jack?” Her tone was one of pure indignation.
“I needed to see you. You haven’t returned any of my calls.”
“I have been busy Jack.” Kari rolled her eyes at me again. I hated to see her like this.
“I just wanted to make sure you were okay.”
Kari smacked her lips. “Really?”
“Yes really. Is the baby okay?”
“Yes, my baby is doing just fine.”
My baby? I let her get away with that one. “That’s good. I didn’t have any way of knowing. I would like to go to the doctor’s visits with you. I want to help in any way that I can.”
She was being hostile toward me and I hadn’t done a thing to her but talk. She left me humiliated and confused. I wasn’t the bad guy but she was treating me as such.
“Jack what do you want?”
“I told you that already. I was seeing if you were okay. By the way I found a place to stay. I’m going to be out of your house soon.”
“Great.” She balked.
I took a step toward her. “Hey, I haven’t done anything to you. I don’t deserve to be spoken to like I’ve done something. I’m the victim here.”
“You haven’t left my house. That’ s something.”
“I just told you I was leaving. I will be gone within the week.”
“Jack , why make this hard?”
“ This is hard for you? That’s rich. I haven’t done anything. You screwed me over.”
“I’m pregnant. I’m tired. I don’t have the time or the energy for a fight.”
“I didn’t come here to fight. I came here to see if you were okay. I was worried. I don’t know where you are or what you’re doing. You’re pregnant so I’m concerned.”
“Fine , you’re concerned. You need to pack up your stuff and leave me alone. Stop calling me. Don’t show up at my job anymore.”
I felt tears forming behind my eyelids. It took great strength to hold them at bay. “You are carrying my child. I am worried. You made these problems, not me. All I did was love you and I tried to give you everything you wanted. You wanted to be married so I tried to give you that. You wanted another child so I tried to give you that. Where did I go wrong? When did you start to hate me?”
“Jack, I don’t hate you. I don’t hate anyone. I’m married now to another man. I can’t hang out with you. I can’t have conversations with you. We can’t see each other anymore. I have to cut ties with you. You have to cut all ties with me. You should want to cut all ties with me.”
“I can’t do that. You’re carrying my child. I would love to tell you to piss off but that’s not really an option for me at this point. There’s a baby on the way.”
“Jack give me a break. I fucked up but shit I can’t apologize enough. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry I hurt you but what do you want from me? I
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