Names for Nothingness

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Authors: Georgia Blain
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passed that she saw him again. He was waiting for her in the back room, but this timehe did not kiss her, he just took her by the hand and told her that he had someone he wanted her to meet. His name was Kalyani, and he was very close to their master. He had left school to devote his life to Satya Deva as a server, and Fraser led her down a corridor to a larger room, lit only by candles, in which a young man dressed in white was packing food into several large crates.
    â€˜Caitlin,’ and when he smiled at her, she thought she had never seen such beauty. His skin was golden, dusted by pale freckles. His thick auburn hair shone in the candlelight. His eyes were a deep sea green flecked with grey, and the hand that he held out to her was cool and strong. ‘I have heard about you,’ he said, and he rested his palm against her cheek for one brief moment.
    He told her that he was taking supplies back, and Caitlin glanced briefly at the crate closest to her, which seemed to be filled with chocolate.
    Kalyani laughed. ‘He has a fondness for sweet things. And I am the one who procures them.’ His eyes sparkled as he looked across at Caitlin. ‘Fraser says you are only new to our community.’
    She nodded in response.
    â€˜But he believes you will one day join us,’ and he jerked his head to indicate the direction of the land where he lived, and where Fraser would soon be going.
    â€˜I don’t know,’ Caitlin smiled.
    â€˜I remember when I was summoned.’ He laughed again. ‘I remember how honoured I was. I had no hesitation, none at all. It was as though my life prior to that moment had simply been a dream, and then – puff – it was gone.’
    Fraser put his arm through hers and she followed him, past his room and out to the front door, where Jacinta waited to let her out into the warmth of the evening.
    Uncomfortable at the prospect of being overheard, Caitlin said nothing, although she did not understand why she was being made to go so soon after seeing him again. He looked into her eyes and smiled, seemingly oblivious to the fact that every word they spoke was audible to Jacinta.
    â€˜I am on a purification program,’ he said, ‘until tomorrow,’ and Caitlin felt foolish for having allowed her desire for his physical attention to be so glaringly obvious. ‘You must come to the weekend,’ he added. ‘I hear you haven’t enrolled.’
    She told him she couldn’t afford it.
    â€˜It is only money,’ and he shrugged his shoulders at its very insignificance.
    â€˜I will try,’ Caitlin promised.
    â€˜And come and see me, in the morning.’ He leant closer to her.
    â€˜I have school,’ she said.
    His smile widened. ‘So?’
    She glanced at the ground, the corners of her mouth turning upwards gently as she lifted her head and looked back at him.
    â€˜Good girl,’ and he squeezed her hand in his own, the pressure of his fingers gentle on her palm.
    And it was not so difficult, she had found, to pack her bag and seemingly head for school, only to take the bus in the other direction; to trace Liam or Sharn’s signature onto the bottom of a note that explained her absence; to withdraw from her life as it had always been and to take her first steps into a new world: not difficult at all.
    But she could not stay this way, one foot in the past, one in the present. As she lay in Fraser’s room, the afternoon light warm on her skin, she knew this, her certainty in this knowledge only increasing with each visit she made to the house. She stared up at the diamond patterns dancing across theceiling until the knock on the door roused her. She had to get home, and he had work to do.
    She let herself out, crossing the street to catch the bus home, and wondered what story she would tell if anyone were to ask her where she had been, which they wouldn’t.
    She could lie, she supposed, or she could tell the

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