seen you hung up this much before. What's the matter, you've developed feelings or something?"
Freddie meant these words as a light-hearted joke, but Tanner suddenly slammed his fist down on the bar, making him jump a little in surprise. "Hell no!" he burst out. "She's a bitch, too smart by half! I most definitely don't have feelings for her!"
"Whoa, easy!" Freddie held up his hands, as if surrendering. "I was just kidding! But this is the first time all week that I've been able to get ahold of you, much less get you out for a drink. What have you been doing with all this time?"
Before answering, Tanner tossed back the rest of his scotch, grimacing as he swallowed. "She's been running me ragged, that's what I've been doing," he complained. "Setting up meetings, giving her briefs on all the other people she meets with - and then, even though I've briefed her, she still drags me along to half the meetings anyway, where I usually just sit behind her and daydream about how her ass looks out of those damn pencil skirts that she always wears. And on top of that, her so-called Chief of Staff, Duecent? Totally incompetent. So now I'm stuck trying to basically single-handedly whip her damn office into shape and hire some people who can tell their heads from their asses." He sighed. "And now I need another drink, because I don't know when the next time I'll even be able to get out of there on time will be."
"Sounds rough," Freddie said sympathetically.
Tanner groaned. "You have no idea. But that damn woman is the worst problem of all. She's in my head now."
"In your head?" Freddie watched, concerned, as Tanner proceeded to lay that very head down on the bar, as if he was about to fall asleep. The man was going to get his suit lapels dirty with the stale beer that constantly coated the railing of the bar, if he wasn't careful. Freddie had never seen Tanner show such a lack of care for his overpriced clothing.
Tanner didn't appear to notice the sticky residue dangerously close to his expensive clothes. "How did she see right through me?" he asked rhetorically. "I totally thought that I had her charmed, eating out of the palm of my hand, ready to snap me up - and instead, she turns the tables on me, like a magician doing that damn trick where he pulls the tablecloth out from underneath all the wine glasses."
Freddie took another pull of his beer as he tried to think of how to respond. He had much less experience with women than Tanner, and he considered the irony of the situation; normally, he would be the one feeling hopeless and asking for advice from Tanner, instead of the other way around.
"Maybe you just need to get out there and distract yourself," he suggested. "It sounds like this Alicia woman has gotten into your head; if you went out and found a different girl to distract yourself, maybe you won't be as bothered by her?"
He wasn't sure if this was actually good advice, but it at least made Tanner sit up. "Actually, that's not bad," the other man replied. "Show myself that I've still got it, that it's Alicia, not me, that's off. Yeah, I can do that!" The bartender came by, pointing at Tanner's glass and raising his eyebrows, and Tanner gave him an enthusiastic nod. "Yes, another!"
Fresh scotch in hand, Tanner spun around on his seat, out to face the crowd. The Capitol Lounge was rapidly filling up with staffers and other young denizens of DC as they came out to whet their whistles and forget about the stress of the day. Tanner ran his eyes over the crowd, surveying the young women like a hungry predator searching for his prey.
"Those two are cute," Freddie volunteered, pointing out two young women who'd just sauntered in, looking around for an open spot. The taller girl was a wispy blonde, while the shorter was a stacked redhead.
"Perfect," Tanner said, perhaps a little too forcefully. He stood up, looking over at the women. "Hey, need a spot?" he called out loudly.
Freddie winced, but the girls smiled after getting
Alys Arden
Claude Lalumiere
Chris Bradford
Capri Montgomery
A. J. Jacobs
John Pearson
J.C. Burke
Charlie Brooker
Kristina Ludwig
Laura Buzo