instructor’s uniform that the ladies find hot, it’s his state of mind and congruency. They like what they see and they get what they like, and have even been prepared to share him in a hot-tub, but that’s another story.
KNOW YOUR OWN POND
OK, let’s get back to you. Do you think that if you have your brand values on display in an environment where they arewell valued, that they might resonate with more than one person? Of course they will! And do you think that a great variety of women can resonate with the same attributes? Of course! So again you have just created a great abundance of choices for yourself.
The corporate banker or lawyer might love your creative side just as much as the art teacher or the nurse who snaps away in her spare time. The ‘crazy’ creative might love your down-to-earth dependability just as much as the single mum or anyone else for that matter. I’m sure you get the idea. Just as you can be attracted to a great variety of people for various reasons, but value the same core attributes, the reverse is obviously also true – only with a much higher probability of success. You are fishing with the right bait in the right pond for a change, and just like with any branding, the more you have your brand values aligned with your customers’ needs and deliver to those values, you have a winning formula that will never ever leave you.
One of my former clients is very successful with women. Well, he’s good at attracting them, but not so good at maintaining meaningful relationships, but that’s another story entirely and more to do with the fact that his work takes him all over the world for long periods of time. He’s a venture capitalist, a city guy, Mr Corporate through and through, and do you know where he has most dating success? Not in the city wine bars and high-powered dining rooms. He has most success in the bars and cafés in the artistic part of town where the actresses and models (and this guy has had some seriously hot women) love his dependability and steady nature. He has a creative side,so he fits in but, in short, he has something that is very attractive to those girls and they have something rather more obviously attractive to him. He is externalizing his qualities in a way that makes him super-desirable, and when the inside actually matches up to the outside they are sold.
If anything, his problems stemmed more from an abundance of choice and his habit of following his ‘small-head’ thoughts when his big head knew better. So much so that I dubbed it SHiT ( Small Head is Thinking ) I bet you’ve made a few SHiT choices in your time too?
Dating ability and confidence simply come from knowing who you are and putting it on display externally in an environment where it is desirable. Simple as that really… oh, and then being able to do something about it.
THE ONE THAT GOT AWAY
Social conditioning dictates that you are unlikely ever to be asked out by a hot woman. That does not mean that she doesn’t want to talk to you. Quite the opposite: she does, she is aching for you to say ‘hi’, but if you don’t know that she’s certainly not going to tell you.
It’s all psychology, but I’ll bet if you really pay attention you can spot the ‘come on over’ and the ‘not on your life’ signals much more easily than you think.
But even if you have your best authentic bait on display and you’re in the right pond, you still have to know how to fish. Every guy following the first two principles here will geta lucky bite from time to time. Just by going this far, you will have more opportunity than most guys ever do, but if you really want to meet Miss Right, and effectively double your chances in half the time, then you are going to have to learn how to fish, too.
A woman will always tell you if she is interested and it’s really, really obvious, if you know what signs to look for. Just as with the perception feedback fieldwork you did earlier, just because
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