Read Online Little Rainbows by Helena Stone - Free Book Online Page B

didn’t know you so well. I know exactly what you would tell me to do if you were here. And I hate you for being right. Of course I should be honest with Jason, give him the opportunity to deny he’s attracted to me, a chance to decide for himself if he wants to see what would happen if we did move forward. I KNOW IT’S ALL ABOUT COMMUNICATION, DARREN. There’s no need to remind me. All right, maybe there is. I’m just not sure I’m brave enough to initiate that conversation. I may not be strong enough to deal with the rejection that might follow. I don’t think I’m ready to deal with the emotions going forward would unleash.
    Darren, for the first time ever, writing to you has not provided me with the answers I need. I’m still no clearer on what I want or need to do. And I guess that means Jason was right. I need to sleep on this day and see how I feel in the morning. How did I end up with two men in my life who think they know it all?
     
    Frustrated, Heather closed her laptop. Writing it all down should have helped her. She’d expected to have a clear plan of action after committing her thoughts and feelings to her laptop. It had always served her well, but not today. This day of all days her sure-fire solution had failed. And, to make matters worse, she’d admitted to feelings she’d been trying hard to ignore and, when that had failed, deny.
    Barely aware of her movements, Heather walked to her suitcase and opened it. She stared at the big pink vibrator she hadn’t unpacked earlier. She was so hot. She could still hear the woman’s moans in her ears—the images of her riding that dildo, the ecstasy when she came, the love in her Master’s eyes as he’d kissed her while she climaxed. Heather couldn’t shake any of them anymore than she could ignore the feelings sitting in Jason’s lap, feeling his lips on hers, had awakened.
    This was a need she could deal with though. It wouldn’t be the same as having a body close to hers, it couldn’t take care of her need for skin-to-skin contact, but it might just take the edge off her desire.
    As she shrugged off her pajamas and threw herself down on the bed, she didn’t need to check her pussy. She knew she was wet, open and ready. She moved the vibrator between her folds, not turning it on yet, just getting it lubricated with her juices until it was slick. And still she didn’t enter the head into her yearning vagina. She pushed the button and shivered as the vibrations traveled through her folds, bucked a little every time she allowed the vibrator to tease her clit.
    Her mind started wandering. The hands holding the vibrator were no longer hers. She could hear Darren talking to her, teasing her as her need grew. Darren’s laughter rang in her ears as he asked her what she needed. His voice telling her not to come once he started fucking her with the vibrator, making sure the little rabbit ears hit her clit just that way every single time, was familiar and welcome. She heard herself begging Darren for permission to come when her need grew too strong. His voice in her ears was loud and clear as he said those words she’d heard so often in the past. The words she treasured and would never hear again.
    “Give it to me, coinín . Show me what you’ve got.” With one hand lodged between her teeth and tears once again streaming down her cheeks, Heather screamed his name in complete silence, unable to repress the thought that this orgasm had also been a form of goodbye.
    Sleep came swiftly after her release. Her mind and body were both exhausted and more than ready to flee to the safety of oblivion. Exhaustion, however, didn’t result in a peaceful night. Images of the couple in the playroom haunted Heather and whenever they faded, Darren would be there. Darren as he played with her, Darren in full Dom mode, Darren at his sickest, Darren in his coffin, Darren fading, morphing until… Jason looking down at her with his dark eyes. Jason kissing her