Read Online I Left My Back Door Open by April Sinclair - Free Book Online

good sport. “And nobody could tell you not to marry …” I caught myself. I didn’t want to mention Tyeesha’s disappearing-act father. He’d hung around just long enough to see her graduate from kindergarten.
    I was thoroughly confused. I’d assumed that Sharon’s heterosexuality had been written in stone. I just couldn’t understand how she could suddenly do such an about-face. I mean, I never saw any signs. I also felt abandoned. It was like my running buddy had run out on me.
    â€œThat was a long time ago,” Sharon said. “I was desperate to have everything fit.”
    â€œDidn’t everything fit?” I asked. “No pun intended, but I don’t remember hearing any complaints.” I sped up to stay with the flow of traffic.
    â€œYeah, things fit, so long as I didn’t know any better.”
    â€œSo, now you suddenly woke up and smelled the pussy, so to speak. Is that what you’re saying?”
    â€œDee Dee, please, don’t be crude. Remember, Tyeesha’s still in the car.”
    â€œI’m sorry,” I said, glancing into my rearview window. Tyeesha’s eyebrows were raised almost to the roof of the car. “Keep those headphones securely over your ears,” I ordered.
    â€œAcknowledging my feelings toward women goes beyond sex,” Sharon continued. “It’s about emotion and intimacy. Things I never got from a man.”
    â€œI don’t know anybody who has a truly intimate relationship with a man. Although in all fairness, Phil is probably more capable of intimacy than Sarita. But generally speaking, men are from another planet. You can have sex without intimacy,” I continued. “And you can have intimacy without sex. But having both is rare. Most women I know get their intimacy needs met from their good girlfriends and female relatives. They’re just thankful if they can coexist with a man. I didn’t think true intimacy was even a goal these days.”
    â€œWell, it is for me. But maybe I just want a little more than most women.”
    I groaned as I maneuvered around a row of orange construction cones.
    â€œThey’re always working on the roads here,” Tyeesha observed from the backseat.
    â€œSharon, didn’t you say kids on campus don’t even get into relationships anymore? That’s what you told me. They’re ridiculed as Velcro twins if they do. They just go out, drink and pick each other up. There’s no intimacy. You said that yourself.”
    â€œSo, Dee Dee, are you wigging out or what?” Sharon asked.
    â€œNo, I’m not wiggging out,” I said, loosening my tight grip on the steering wheel. “I’m just surprised.” I glanced at Sharon. “Have you ever even been with a woman? Have you even kissed a woman?”
    â€œSee, Mom, that’s the same thing I asked you.”
    â€œGo back to your music! Dee Dee, if I had, I would’ve told you. I wouldn’t keep something like that from you.”
    â€œYou haven’t done anything? Then how did you come up with this foolishness?” I asked, changing to the slow lane.
    â€œYou are wigging out!”
    â€œNo, I’m not,” I insisted. But I secretly wished I still had a stick shift to grab on to for support. When I turned forty last year, I decided I was too old to shift gears and bought an automatic.
    â€œI don’t appreciate your calling my feelings foolishness!”
    I could hear the hurt in Sharon’s voice and see Tyeesha’s eyes widen in my rearview mirror. My voice softened. “I’m sorry, dear heart. I want to support you. I just wondered how you know you’re gay, that’s all.”
    â€œHow do you know you’re straight?”
    â€œBecause men peel my paint, and women don’t. For me, it’s always been that simple.”
    â€œWell, maybe for some of us, things are a little more complex. I would never have