it.”
I brought the water bottle to my lips again and downed all the water. He was right. Sophia was clouding my mind, but it wasn’t her fault. “Yeah, you’re right but I can’t let her go, Connor.”
“ You need to slow it down,” Connor snapped. “You can’t expect that she’s coming back to you when you want. Give her some time. She needs to see that you’re here for good and you aren’t playing games. Four years is a long time bro. She wants to make sure you’re the same person and if you really want her back, you’ll respect that.”
I listened to what he was saying and he was right. I couldn’t expect Sophia to come back without asking questions and being cautious. She had every right to be worried. I went back to the kitchen and grabbed a beer. I twisted off the cap and tossed the cap in the trash. I took a swig of my beer as Connor watched me closely.
“Can you promise me something?”
“What?”
Connor stood up and walked over to me. “Time and patience alright and don’t lose focus. This is our senior year and we need to make sure everything is perfect. Mother and Father are counting on us.”
“Alright,” I let out a sigh. “I’m going to my room. Thanks for listening.”
He slapped my back, “You know I’m here for you.”
I smiled at him and finished my beer. I placed the empty bottle next to the sink. I walked away and headed back to my room. I closed the door and fell on top of my bed. I looked at the ceiling. This feeling had been with me for too long and I needed to let go of missing her and wanting her. It was obvious she didn’t want me around but a part of me was still holding onto her and the chance that maybe she could change her mind. I got up from my bed and looked outside. It seemed peaceful and beautiful, unlike the chaos of Boston .
Later that night as I slept, I tossed and turned uneasily. I’d spent a few hours watching movies Sophia and I watched together. It felt like she was here by my side like she never left. Every weekend she’d be over at my house and we stayed in my room, laughing, talking, and feeling as if nothing else mattered because it was just us. She laid on my lap and I’d stroked her hair wondering what she’d look like on top of me. She never noticed how hard I got when she was around, at least I didn’t think so. Nothing ever happened between us even though it crossed my mind every time we were together. She was shy around the topic of sex and her face always turned red when there’d be a sex scene during a movie we’d be watching. My sweet and innocent Sophia.
I sat up in bed and pulled out the photo album she made for me. There were pictures of us from when we were little until senior year, before her mom passed away. I memorized her smile and each expression. How could everything we built crash with a few stupid mistakes? The nagging notion that I was doing too much or not enough kept attacking me. I wasn’t sure if I was pushing her too hard or if this was what she needed. Sophia meant everything to me and I wasn’t going to fail her again.
“I miss you, Sophia,” I whispered hoping that in some way she could hear me.
Chapter 8
We woke up the next morning and went for a run. Connor kept reminding me to keep my cool today and to remain focused. I knew he hated the drama, but he stood by me.
“Just focus alright? It’s important you don’t lose your head.”
“I miss her Connor. We talked for a minute and then she left as if I was going to hurt her.” We kept running. “What can I do?”
Connor paused for a moment. “There’s nothing you can do. You just need to give her time.”
“Yeah.”
After running about three miles, we got back to the apartment, drank a protein shake, and changed into basketball shorts and white tees.
“Ready?”
I nodded and we headed to campus.
Day one of basketball try-outs and we were both excited. I knew we would make the team; we were stars in high school and at college in
I brought the water bottle to my lips again and downed all the water. He was right. Sophia was clouding my mind, but it wasn’t her fault. “Yeah, you’re right but I can’t let her go, Connor.”
“ You need to slow it down,” Connor snapped. “You can’t expect that she’s coming back to you when you want. Give her some time. She needs to see that you’re here for good and you aren’t playing games. Four years is a long time bro. She wants to make sure you’re the same person and if you really want her back, you’ll respect that.”
I listened to what he was saying and he was right. I couldn’t expect Sophia to come back without asking questions and being cautious. She had every right to be worried. I went back to the kitchen and grabbed a beer. I twisted off the cap and tossed the cap in the trash. I took a swig of my beer as Connor watched me closely.
“Can you promise me something?”
“What?”
Connor stood up and walked over to me. “Time and patience alright and don’t lose focus. This is our senior year and we need to make sure everything is perfect. Mother and Father are counting on us.”
“Alright,” I let out a sigh. “I’m going to my room. Thanks for listening.”
He slapped my back, “You know I’m here for you.”
I smiled at him and finished my beer. I placed the empty bottle next to the sink. I walked away and headed back to my room. I closed the door and fell on top of my bed. I looked at the ceiling. This feeling had been with me for too long and I needed to let go of missing her and wanting her. It was obvious she didn’t want me around but a part of me was still holding onto her and the chance that maybe she could change her mind. I got up from my bed and looked outside. It seemed peaceful and beautiful, unlike the chaos of Boston .
Later that night as I slept, I tossed and turned uneasily. I’d spent a few hours watching movies Sophia and I watched together. It felt like she was here by my side like she never left. Every weekend she’d be over at my house and we stayed in my room, laughing, talking, and feeling as if nothing else mattered because it was just us. She laid on my lap and I’d stroked her hair wondering what she’d look like on top of me. She never noticed how hard I got when she was around, at least I didn’t think so. Nothing ever happened between us even though it crossed my mind every time we were together. She was shy around the topic of sex and her face always turned red when there’d be a sex scene during a movie we’d be watching. My sweet and innocent Sophia.
I sat up in bed and pulled out the photo album she made for me. There were pictures of us from when we were little until senior year, before her mom passed away. I memorized her smile and each expression. How could everything we built crash with a few stupid mistakes? The nagging notion that I was doing too much or not enough kept attacking me. I wasn’t sure if I was pushing her too hard or if this was what she needed. Sophia meant everything to me and I wasn’t going to fail her again.
“I miss you, Sophia,” I whispered hoping that in some way she could hear me.
Chapter 8
We woke up the next morning and went for a run. Connor kept reminding me to keep my cool today and to remain focused. I knew he hated the drama, but he stood by me.
“Just focus alright? It’s important you don’t lose your head.”
“I miss her Connor. We talked for a minute and then she left as if I was going to hurt her.” We kept running. “What can I do?”
Connor paused for a moment. “There’s nothing you can do. You just need to give her time.”
“Yeah.”
After running about three miles, we got back to the apartment, drank a protein shake, and changed into basketball shorts and white tees.
“Ready?”
I nodded and we headed to campus.
Day one of basketball try-outs and we were both excited. I knew we would make the team; we were stars in high school and at college in
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