Forgive Me Father For I Have Loved

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Authors: Tiana Laveen
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gripped his gray sweatshirt hoodie, covering his hair as it came down even harder—then there she was, her back turned. She sang louder, her hair again wrapped up, high to the sky like Erykah Baud’s, circa 2000.
    “Jesus...what a beautiful voice,” he said, caught in a trance as she slowly glided back and forth, as if reaching for angels. “She sure sings like one...” A lump formed suddenly in his throat, and he rubbed his swollen eyes. He hadn’t slept in days, but he strained with all of his might to focus on her as she exercised, and her tune soon turned back into a low hum. She seemed unmoved by the rain, moving, twirling and prancing about playfully. She owned the space, she was the queen of peace, she was the wife of ‘not a care in the world’—she had papers on it. He wanted to know what it felt like again. He wanted a taste of what she had...
     
    ~***~
     
    Rhapsody glanced at the clock above her living room television, not believing the time. She blinked several times, rubbed her eyes and struggled amongst the overstuffed throw pillows on the couch, trying to free herself from the cocoon of their softness that surrounded her form. It was two in the morning, and she’d fallen asleep there yet once again. The television DVR buzzed as her favorite television programs were taped, reminding her she needed some down-time. She had been too busy and tired as of late, but she promised herself she’d indulge in a ‘stay-cation’ as soon as possible. Rhapsody got to her feet. She stood and stretched her stiff body in need of the comforts of her Queen sized bed, not the broken-in- couch she’d made into a cot one time too many. Yawning loudly, she made her way out of the room, down the short hall and into her bedroom. As she slid under the sheets, she closed her eyes, but not for long.
    That’s right!
    She popped back up, flinging the sheets off of her in haste. Grabbing a pen and paper out of her nightstand drawer, she jotted down song lyrics that had been dancing in her head for weeks. She felt inspired, and she’d dreamed of kelly green blades of grass, chirping birds and storm clouds that threatened to ruin it all. The lyrics kept coming, all streaming from her recent trysts at Mies Park. She reminisced as the words continued to take over, pouring onto the paper.
    The people watching in the park while she exercised her body and vocal chords proved to be quite entertaining, but more than anything, she had some new eye candy and she was more than happy to take an indulgent nibble or two. What began as a secret glance here and there, escalated into curiosity. The man was alluring. He had a quiet strength about him, yet, he seemed troubled, regardless of the kind smile that would crease his face when she’d glance his way. Poems, song lyrics, thoughts and ideas raced inside of her based on her fleeting interactions with the guy. They’d never spoken a word, but she felt as if they’d been communicating for weeks...
    She hated to admit it to herself as her pen moved hastily across the dark blue line in her binder, scribbling verses with nimble fingers, but he’d caught her attention alright.
    Hell, if he is my muse for a new song, so be it...
    She grinned as she continued to write, wondering where it would all end, but one thing was for certain before the end of that summer, she wanted the man to say something to her, anything.
    Yes, she’d sworn off men, but hey, this was innocent. She saw nothing wrong with admiring the scenery. Besides, just because she wasn’t buying didn’t mean she couldn’t window shop and from her vantage point, he showcased an award-winning display of charismatic bling that she simply couldn’t resist...
     
    ~***~
     
    Three weeks later...
     
    Before he’d even had a moment to catch up and distract himself with overdue duties, Dane found himself in the midst of troubled waters, standing in the church that he and Josh’s family attended when they were mere children. Where

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