can go.
You owe me for making me drive out here."
I watched
her drive away, wishing she had stayed, suddenly feeling even worse and more
mixed-up about the whole situation. I climbed back into the big Chevy I had
driven to the coffee shop, and made my way slowly back to the house, wondering
how the night would unfold.
****
Zach was
quiet and well mannered the entire dinner, as if he was making an effort to be
on his best behavior. Things were so awkward I couldn't stand it. Even worse
was the tension between me and Laird . Every time our
eyes met, it felt like something powerful was happening in the air between us.
Was it all
just in my head?
I had never
felt anything like it, and feeling the strange attraction between me and this
tall, handsome stranger and myself, while my boyfriend was sitting right there
next to us, was almost too much for me to process.
After all,
why would someone like Laird, who'd had several gorgeous wives and whom Zach
made sound like a famous ladies' man, want someone like me? I felt lucky just
dating his son, and Zach, despite whatever charms he may have, was admittedly
kind of a slob.
"How do
you like your food?" Laird asked. I had barely touched my chicken.
"It's
fine," I said, forcing a smile. The tension in the air was simply too much
for me to take. "Could you excuse me for a second?"
"Of
course," Laird said graciously, and Zach stood up so I could slide out of
the booth.
I
practically ran to the bathroom. I braced myself against the counter and took a
good long look in the mirror as my heartrate began to
return to normal.
Get a grip,
Hailey. Things
aren't going to work out between you and Zach, but you knew that all along. An extremely attractive older man saw you practically naked a few hours ago and it seemed
like he liked it. That's not crazy or out of the ordinary.
Boys like
how you look naked. You like how you look naked. But boys don't want to date
you, and that's just how it is. You'll have to learn to live with it. Just
because a man saw you naked a few hours ago doesn't mean he suddenly wants to
be with you. It doesn't matter how much you want him, how turned on you are,
how much chemistry you feel. He's older, and he's way out of your league.
Actually, he's so out of your league he literally dates models. He's not going
to want to be with you.
So get a
grip, go back to dinner, sit down, be polite, and try not to make a fool of
yourself.
"Okay,"
I said out loud to my image peering back at me from the mirror. Today had been
crazy, but I finally felt grounded again. "Let's go."
I closed my
eyes and took a deep breath. It always hurt inside when I crushed my own dreams
the way I did, but I had been doing it for such a long time now, it felt like
second nature. The only other alternative was being out of control, giving in
to my feelings and being disappointed, and I could only do that so many times
before it felt like I was going to die from grief. It was better to stay
guarded, the way I had learned to do over the years.
I took
another deep breath, centering myself. I heard the bathroom door open as
another diner hurriedly entered the bathroom.
I yelped as
I saw the reflection of the person who just entered. It was Laird who had
walked in.
"What
are you doing in here ?! " I asked his image in the
mirror. Laird didn't answer. Instead, he walked up behind me and gripped my
waist savagely in his hands.
I moaned,
beside myself with lust as his crotch pressed hard against my ass.
"What
are you doing ?! " I breathed. Of course, I liked
it.
Laird's
hands ran deliciously over my body, tracing my curves until they settled on my
breasts. His face buried itself in the hair around my neck, and I felt his
stubble scratching the nape of my neck as his lips tasted my skin and he
breathed me in.
I should
have done something--pushed him away, said no. But I had
You owe me for making me drive out here."
I watched
her drive away, wishing she had stayed, suddenly feeling even worse and more
mixed-up about the whole situation. I climbed back into the big Chevy I had
driven to the coffee shop, and made my way slowly back to the house, wondering
how the night would unfold.
****
Zach was
quiet and well mannered the entire dinner, as if he was making an effort to be
on his best behavior. Things were so awkward I couldn't stand it. Even worse
was the tension between me and Laird . Every time our
eyes met, it felt like something powerful was happening in the air between us.
Was it all
just in my head?
I had never
felt anything like it, and feeling the strange attraction between me and this
tall, handsome stranger and myself, while my boyfriend was sitting right there
next to us, was almost too much for me to process.
After all,
why would someone like Laird, who'd had several gorgeous wives and whom Zach
made sound like a famous ladies' man, want someone like me? I felt lucky just
dating his son, and Zach, despite whatever charms he may have, was admittedly
kind of a slob.
"How do
you like your food?" Laird asked. I had barely touched my chicken.
"It's
fine," I said, forcing a smile. The tension in the air was simply too much
for me to take. "Could you excuse me for a second?"
"Of
course," Laird said graciously, and Zach stood up so I could slide out of
the booth.
I
practically ran to the bathroom. I braced myself against the counter and took a
good long look in the mirror as my heartrate began to
return to normal.
Get a grip,
Hailey. Things
aren't going to work out between you and Zach, but you knew that all along. An extremely attractive older man saw you practically naked a few hours ago and it seemed
like he liked it. That's not crazy or out of the ordinary.
Boys like
how you look naked. You like how you look naked. But boys don't want to date
you, and that's just how it is. You'll have to learn to live with it. Just
because a man saw you naked a few hours ago doesn't mean he suddenly wants to
be with you. It doesn't matter how much you want him, how turned on you are,
how much chemistry you feel. He's older, and he's way out of your league.
Actually, he's so out of your league he literally dates models. He's not going
to want to be with you.
So get a
grip, go back to dinner, sit down, be polite, and try not to make a fool of
yourself.
"Okay,"
I said out loud to my image peering back at me from the mirror. Today had been
crazy, but I finally felt grounded again. "Let's go."
I closed my
eyes and took a deep breath. It always hurt inside when I crushed my own dreams
the way I did, but I had been doing it for such a long time now, it felt like
second nature. The only other alternative was being out of control, giving in
to my feelings and being disappointed, and I could only do that so many times
before it felt like I was going to die from grief. It was better to stay
guarded, the way I had learned to do over the years.
I took
another deep breath, centering myself. I heard the bathroom door open as
another diner hurriedly entered the bathroom.
I yelped as
I saw the reflection of the person who just entered. It was Laird who had
walked in.
"What
are you doing in here ?! " I asked his image in the
mirror. Laird didn't answer. Instead, he walked up behind me and gripped my
waist savagely in his hands.
I moaned,
beside myself with lust as his crotch pressed hard against my ass.
"What
are you doing ?! " I breathed. Of course, I liked
it.
Laird's
hands ran deliciously over my body, tracing my curves until they settled on my
breasts. His face buried itself in the hair around my neck, and I felt his
stubble scratching the nape of my neck as his lips tasted my skin and he
breathed me in.
I should
have done something--pushed him away, said no. But I had
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