Read Online Everything I Need to Know I Learned from Dungeons & Dragons by Shelly Mazzanoble - Free Book Online

were Macs. There was one girl who appeared to be with parents who were not filled with rage by her existence. In fact, they were the opposite, what with the constant patting on the head and conspiratory whispers. Did her dad wipe a tear from his eye?
    Every now and again another patron stopped by their table and said something to the little girl that made her smile. When they left Dad would fill up the kid’s cup with apple juice and say
cheers!
What were they teaching this kid? Through it all, the family appeared rather fixated on the walls.
    Ah, the walls. Right. They were looking at the artwork, which quite honestly wasn’t much to write home about. Each piece was mounted on what looked like a piece of sketch paper and pressed into an Ikea frame. The art looked a bit like those ribbon potholders I used to make Judy in second grade, only there was no ribbon—just paint. Caitlin signed each piece with big, loopy, novelty penmanship that said
By Caitlin.
I’m no curator but these looked like a child did them. In fact, that baby boozer up front with her parents could have done these.
    â€œCongratulations, Caitlin!” a departing patron waved to the table. “You are so talented, young lady!”
    Wait. We’re already offering compliments to kids for their drinking skills? She’s not even in high school yet!
    Caitlin blushed. Her mom patted her head. Dad filled her cup again.
    Ohhhhhhhhhhh.…
    I didn’t have a clue what I’d do with the end result but suddenly it became clear what I had to do. Caitlin had produced quite the body of work and had managed to land an art showing right there in my favorite coffee shop. Quite a coup, indeed. I laughed, thinking of what my parents would do if I were Caitlin. She was lucky to get away with some faux scotch and a few cheek pinches.
    â€œExcuse me,” I said when I approached the family’s table. “Do you happen to know who the artist of these fine pieces might be?”
    Again, Caitlin blushed. Her parents looked so deliriously happy I thought the pride swelling their heads would surely cause them to pop right off.
    â€œCaitlin?” her mom whispered. “Do you want to tell her?”
    â€œMe,” Caitlin said softly. “I’m the artist.”
    â€œWell, your paintings are beautiful,” I told her. “I’m no expert but if I had to guess it looks like you practice the ancient art of blue and yellow squiggly brush? Tough medium to master.”
    Caitlin giggled but her parents acted like they were watching the headliner at the Laugh Factory. And slightly drunk.
    â€œAre they for sale?” I asked.
    She nodded her head. The parents were turning an alarming shade of scarlet. Yes, they reminded me a lot of my parents.
    Scanning the wall, I found the biggest, most gaudy one and pointed at it. “Is that one still available?”
    Caitlin nodded her head.
    â€œGreat!” I said, “I’ll take it.”
    â€œOh my God, Cate!” Her mom screeched. “Your first sale!”
    The dad stood up, smacked me on the back, and immediately apologized for letting the excitement get to him.
    â€œWe’re just so proud,” he said, then whispered, “It’s supposed to be $40. But you can pay whatever you want.”
    â€œI’ll pay $40. Totally worth it.”
    Cate and company made a big production out of sticking the red dot next to the painting I chose. Caitlin beamed when she told me I could come back in four weeks to pick it up. Lots more congratulations and cheers ensued. Dad was full-on crying.
    When I got back to my table, the barista brought over my extra-caffeinated latte. He had crafted one of those Christian fish symbols in the foam.
    See? That’s why this guy was nearly a champion.
    FRIDAY’S GOD: PELOR
    GOD OF: SUN AND SUMMER
    Delights in:
helping those in need and opposing evil
    Pelor rocks. This is definitely a god I can get behind. It’s all