Read Online Every Young Man's Battle: Stategies for Victory in the Real World of Sexual Temptation: The Every Man Series by Stephen Arterburn - Free Book Online
Authors: Stephen Arterburn
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standard of sexual purity, are you willing, in the spirit of
Josiah, to make a covenant to hold to that standard with all your heart and
soul? Will you tear down every sexual thing that stands in opposition to God?
Will you aim for authenticity and obedience, where you’re truly called to
go?
If you’ve been living a life of mixed standards, you
probably have mixture in your
sexual
standards as well. It’s
likely you have at least a hint of sexual impurity in your life. In that case,
you’re not ready to pay the price of true obedience—like avoiding
the sensuality found in many Hollywood films. Like avoiding sexy thoughts about
the “goddesses” at your school. Like training your eyes to look
away from string bikinis, full-busted sweaters, and the hot-looking babes who
wear them.
A spiritual battle for purity is going on in every heart and
soul. The costs are real. Obedience is hard, requiring humility and meekness,
very rare elements indeed.
We were told about James, a respected teen
in his youth group, who refused to promise to stay sexually pure when pressed
to do so. “There are too many unforeseen situations out there for me to
make such a promise,” he said. Translation: “I want to keep my
options open.”
James has stopped short. Have you?
The
point is this: Sexual impurity has become rampant in the church because
we’ve ignored the costly work of obedience to God’s standards as
individuals, asking too often, “How far can I go and still be called a
Christian?” We’ve crafted an image that may seem sexually pure,
while permitting our eyes to play freely when no one’s around and
avoiding the hard work of purity.
From my (Fred’s) college days,
one man’s example of this still serves as a warning to me. During my
freshman year at Stanford, I became homesick. A dorm buddy who grew up in the
shadow of the university felt sorry for me and asked me to his parents’
home for dinner. They were extremely wealthy, and their home was stunning. What
a great night! Not only was I served my first artichokes (which fascinate me to
this day), but the mother was a strikingly pleasant host. That evening I
learned that the father, a prominent local businessman, held a high position in
their church and believed in the importance of family time.
A few weeks
later, I was sitting in a barber’s chair when my friend’s dad
walked into the shop. Being somewhat shy, I didn’t say anything. Because
of my wet hair and the barber’s drape around my neck, he apparently
didn’t recognize someone he’d met only one time. Sitting down to
wait his turn, he picked up a
Playboy
magazine. I was stunned! I
watched to see whether he was “just reading the articles,” but he
immediately turned the magazine sideways to catch Miss March in her full
glory.
Is this you? Is there a secret, dark side to your Christian
image? If you’re a teen, are you going on missions trips during the
summer but still fondling some girl’s breasts in the backseat of a car?
If you’re in college, are you leading a Bible study on campus but
fantasizing day and night about the naked women you see on the Internet?
Who are you, really?
A search for the comfortable middle
ground is an inadequate approach to God. We must count the cost of
purity—and pay it. If we don’t kill every hint of immorality,
we’ll be captured by our tendency as males to draw sexual gratification
and chemical highs through our eyes—something we’ll discuss in the
next chapter. But we can’t deal with our maleness until we first reject
our right to mix standards.
----
six 6
just by being
male
Before Brenda gave birth to our fourth child, I (Fred) became
convinced through prayer that the child would be a boy, our second son. I was
so certain of this that I told her and a few close friends that I was
sure
it would be a boy.
As delivery day neared, the pressure rose.
“Why did I tell everyone?” I whined.
Josiah, to make a covenant to hold to that standard with all your heart and
soul? Will you tear down every sexual thing that stands in opposition to God?
Will you aim for authenticity and obedience, where you’re truly called to
go?
If you’ve been living a life of mixed standards, you
probably have mixture in your
sexual
standards as well. It’s
likely you have at least a hint of sexual impurity in your life. In that case,
you’re not ready to pay the price of true obedience—like avoiding
the sensuality found in many Hollywood films. Like avoiding sexy thoughts about
the “goddesses” at your school. Like training your eyes to look
away from string bikinis, full-busted sweaters, and the hot-looking babes who
wear them.
A spiritual battle for purity is going on in every heart and
soul. The costs are real. Obedience is hard, requiring humility and meekness,
very rare elements indeed.
We were told about James, a respected teen
in his youth group, who refused to promise to stay sexually pure when pressed
to do so. “There are too many unforeseen situations out there for me to
make such a promise,” he said. Translation: “I want to keep my
options open.”
James has stopped short. Have you?
The
point is this: Sexual impurity has become rampant in the church because
we’ve ignored the costly work of obedience to God’s standards as
individuals, asking too often, “How far can I go and still be called a
Christian?” We’ve crafted an image that may seem sexually pure,
while permitting our eyes to play freely when no one’s around and
avoiding the hard work of purity.
From my (Fred’s) college days,
one man’s example of this still serves as a warning to me. During my
freshman year at Stanford, I became homesick. A dorm buddy who grew up in the
shadow of the university felt sorry for me and asked me to his parents’
home for dinner. They were extremely wealthy, and their home was stunning. What
a great night! Not only was I served my first artichokes (which fascinate me to
this day), but the mother was a strikingly pleasant host. That evening I
learned that the father, a prominent local businessman, held a high position in
their church and believed in the importance of family time.
A few weeks
later, I was sitting in a barber’s chair when my friend’s dad
walked into the shop. Being somewhat shy, I didn’t say anything. Because
of my wet hair and the barber’s drape around my neck, he apparently
didn’t recognize someone he’d met only one time. Sitting down to
wait his turn, he picked up a
Playboy
magazine. I was stunned! I
watched to see whether he was “just reading the articles,” but he
immediately turned the magazine sideways to catch Miss March in her full
glory.
Is this you? Is there a secret, dark side to your Christian
image? If you’re a teen, are you going on missions trips during the
summer but still fondling some girl’s breasts in the backseat of a car?
If you’re in college, are you leading a Bible study on campus but
fantasizing day and night about the naked women you see on the Internet?
Who are you, really?
A search for the comfortable middle
ground is an inadequate approach to God. We must count the cost of
purity—and pay it. If we don’t kill every hint of immorality,
we’ll be captured by our tendency as males to draw sexual gratification
and chemical highs through our eyes—something we’ll discuss in the
next chapter. But we can’t deal with our maleness until we first reject
our right to mix standards.
----
six 6
just by being
male
Before Brenda gave birth to our fourth child, I (Fred) became
convinced through prayer that the child would be a boy, our second son. I was
so certain of this that I told her and a few close friends that I was
sure
it would be a boy.
As delivery day neared, the pressure rose.
“Why did I tell everyone?” I whined.
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