Divergent Parody: Avirgent

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Authors: Maurice Hill, Michelle Hunt
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up stronzo comes back and doesn't just beat you bloody, he leaves you dead . Now, I plan on making this quick, and very painful, but also so that he never sees us.” He points to me.
     “But this bloodsucker will see you. And it doesn't matter if you win or lose, he will find you, rape you, then ask you where we are. When you say you don't know...he'll rape you again, and then he'll ask you one more time before he rapes you a third time and then puts you underneath with the fishes. Oh God, I'm sorry, I hate using the 'fish' cliché but it just came to mind. Ha!” He patted Hailey on the back as I thought of Limp...doing those terrible things to me. I felt a pit in my stomach.
     Christine nudged me. “Don't worry about it tumbleweed. He makes a good point. It's something we'll have to do. That guy is nuts. He killed someone, we'll deliver him his just desserts. A psycho like that who doesn't care about human life deserves to be put down like the dog he is. I mean, you can say we're not the ones who should decide that, but I say screw that. He killed once, and he'll do it again.”
     I nodded. “Okay. I'll do it. When?”
    Al tapped the table. “As soon as Hailey finds a nice spot that's camera free. She's good at that mission impossible shit.”
    Hailey crunched the last bit of her carrot and smiled. “I love dark and tight places. It reminds me of my vagina.”
     Christine let out a groan and put her collard greens down. “Yeah, I think I'm done eating for today.”
    I looked down at my plate with only five peas on it. Even I started to feel sick.
    “Yeah, me too.”
     Al leaned in. “Alright, it's settled. Once Hailey finds the space, we'll move into our plan. Now, I have another concern. It's about TB4. Christine, I think you're right. He's hiding something more from us, but I don't think it's a matter of people protecting themselves or us. It's about them watching one sole person.”
    My heart sank. Did he know about Avirgents?
    Christine batted a brow. “What?”
    “Avirgent,” said Al, confidently. My heart sank lower.
    “Please, Avirgent is as real as bigfoot. There's been no such case,” said Christine.
    Al shook his head. “Then explain the cameras. This city doesn't go into extreme measures like that, except when someone is a risk to national-or in our case, regional security. Someone here is Avirgent.” He looked between us two. “It could be you, and it could be Mika. It could be one of Limp's old crew over there, or Limp himself. You ask me, it's probably him.”
    Christine nodded. “That's an if a big if . If , he is one, it'd make the most sense. I can imagine him being a hybrid of Rambunctious and Tricker. Like breeding a lion and a wolf together.”
     Al nodded, smirking. “Yeah, or a sadist and your friendly neighborhood psychopath. Either way, he's most likely the one. Of course, there's even rumors that Avirgents don't show any of the signs at all. Sometimes they could be the people you least...”
    His words came in one ear and out of the other.
     I felt like I were watching him in slow motion speak to me and Christine as he explained what he knew about Avirgents. I felt like I was listening in on a doctor talking to my Mom about me. Or my parents discussing my behavior. I felt like a fly on the wall, the outside looking in...things like that.
     “...so yeah, either way, they're pretty freakin' dangerous. One , just one Avirgent getting a high position of power in a faction, can mean the end of our society and the start of their own.”
    Christine shrugged. “Maybe that's a good thing. They could put this little experiment of Jeanine's to rest. This faction stuff all feels like some sick science project made by some spoiled rich kid.”
     “She looks like that actress from a century ago. You know, Kate Winslet,” said Hailey.
    Al laughed. “You know, I never thought of that. She kind of does.”
    He put his hands together as I twirled my hair around. “Well Christine, it

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