Read Online Cosmic by Frank Cottrell Boyce - Free Book Online Page B

And see you at a secret location very very soon.
     
    It turned out that even though Florida knew the name of every single person who had ever been on a reality TV show, she had never even heard of Dinah Drax.
    “How can you not have heard of Dinah Drax? You’ve got DraxWorld on your phone.”
    “I didn’t know Drax was a person. I thought it was just a word, like ‘phone’ or ‘Mercedes.’”
    “Mercedes is a person. She was the daughter of the man who owned the company.”
    “Never heard of her either. She’s not a celebrity, is she? Otherwise she’d be in the magazines, wouldn’t she?”
    “Lots of people are famous who are not in your magazines.”
    “Like who?”
    I made a list. It was completely amazing how many very famous people Florida had never heard of. For instance, Rob Pardo, Jeff Kaplan and Tom Chilton—she’d never heard of them, even though they invented World of Warcraft and revolutionized online game playing! Tolkien—cosmic author of Lord of the Rings ? No. She got confused between Buzz Aldrin—second man on the moon—and Buzz Lightyear—a toy. She recognized Hitler’s second name butshe thought his first name was Heil.
    Barney gave a little snort when he heard that.
    Florida snapped, “Excuse me, what are you laugh…” but she didn’t finish her sentence. She just said, “Wow!”
    We had just driven into a field and there, on the grass, where you might expect to see a cow, was a big red airplane.
    “That,” said Florida, “is a Learjet, as flown by John Travolta.”
    Barney smiled. “You may not know much about world leaders of the twentieth century, but you’re definitely up to date with celebrity transport.”
    “Whose is it?” asked Florida.
    “For today,” said Barney, “it’s yours.”
    I did think that going on a plane might make Florida suspicious about just where Infinity Park was. But she was so thrilled by the celebrityness of it all that she forgot to wonder where it was going to take her. In fact, before the car had even stopped she was somehow standing on the steps of the plane. I said thank you for the lift and tried to make myself look as dadly as possible. I grabbed a newspaper out of the seat pocket and stuck it under my arm and brushed my hair forward. I definitely felt older.
    When I got near to Florida she spread out her arms and grinned at me. I couldn’t figure out what she thought shewas doing but then she hissed, “Photo. Take photos. With your phone. It’s what dads do.”
    “My dad doesn’t.”
    “Well, mine does. He’s like my own personal paparazzi.”
    “Paparazzo. Paparazzi is when there’s more than one.”
    “And he doesn’t correct everything I say either.”

Competitive Dadliness
    There was a small, neat woman waiting on the steps of the plane. She had very white teeth and her hair was as smooth and black as Playmobil. She offered Florida her hand and said, “Florida Digby! So pleased to meet you. How does it feel to have one of the four best dads in the world?”
    “Who are you?” said Florida.
    “I,” said the woman, “am Dinah Drax.”
    Dr. Drax! The woman herself! When it was my turn to shake her hand I got so excited I forgot to let go of it. She must’ve thought I was trying to get one of her fingers as a souvenir. I tried to think of something clever to say, but all I could manage was “I love your phones.”
    “A lot of people do, you know. Thank goodness.”
    “He’s always going on about you,” said Florida.
    “All complimentary, I hope.”
    “I don’t know—I never listen to him. Love this plane.”
    The plane was impressive, I have to say. It didn’t have rows of seats like a normal plane. It had couches and easy chairs and little tables. There were three children down at the front and Galaxy Trader playing on a big video screen. And three dads at the back, on the couches.
    “Maybe Florida would like to go and play with the other children, while I introduce you to the other