Read Online Cosmic by Frank Cottrell Boyce - Free Book Online Page A

limo then?” she hissed. “I knew you were making it up.”
    “Hello, Florida,” said Dad. “Are you going on this trip too then?”
    “Yes, Mr. Digby.”
    “I’m cooking some bacon,” said Dad. “D’you want a bit while you’re waiting for the minibus?”
    “Minibus?” said Florida, glaring at me. But just as she did, the transport arrived. It slid round the corner like a glossy shark—a long, black limo.
    “Blimey!” Dad whistled. “School geography trips have changed a bit since my day.”
    “It’s not a geography trip,” said Mom. “It’s for Gifted and Talented pupils. Didn’t you read the letter?”
    “Yeah, but…I just didn’t know he was that gifted. Or that talented. And I didn’t know Florida was gifted at all.”
    Florida snarled. Mom said, “Of course she’s talented! Don’t you remember? She was Sophie in The BFG . She remembered all her lines. What’s that smell?”
    “Oh,” said Dad. “My bacon.” And he ran back into the kitchen.
    A man was getting out of the limo now and opening the back passenger door. People up and down the street were looking out of their front doors and peeping out from behind their curtains.
    Florida said, “Let’s go.”
    I said, “Yeah,” and kissed my mom and shouted goodbye to Dad. Then we climbed into the back of the limo. I looked back for a second—at my mom and dad in the doorway, with bacon smoke blowing out of the door from behindthem and the smoke alarm blasting away.
    Mom shouted, “Look after him, Florida.”
    And I said, “See you.” I didn’t think then that maybe I wouldn’t see them again. And that that would be my last sight of them. I’ve thought about it since though.
     
    It wasn’t some bachelorette-party stretch limo, by the way. It was a nice black Audi Quattro. There was a really polite satnav. Dad’s satnav just goes, “Left…right…stop…” and it sounds like an alien storm trooper who has hijacked your car. This one had a flutey girl’s voice and it said please and thank you.
    The driver had a special cap and gray uniform. His name was Barney. There were two big paper bags on the backseat. “Goody bags,” said Barney. “Just like at the Oscars, eh?”
    If “limo” had a magical effect on Florida, you should have seen what “Oscars” did. Apparently when celebrities go to the Oscars or whatever, they’re all given a bag full of complimentary products. Today, as Florida very quickly pointed out, we were the celebrities.
    She leaned back in her seat and looked out at the streets we were leaving behind. “I wonder,” she said, “what the ordinary people are doing today.” Then she started rooting around in her goody bag. She found a brand-new fourth-generation Draxcommunications phone, a Draxcom watch,Draxcom sunglasses, and a Draxcom T-shirt, a box of chocolates with the Draxcom logo on the front and a little pink Gamemaiden—which is like a girly Game Boy made by Draxcom.
    I got the phone in my goody bag too. It was pretty cosmic. It had DraxWorld on it, and Draxcall—which lets you use bits of video instead of a ringtone. Florida made a video ringtone of a crowd of people in a studio, all clapping and cheering and calling her name, as though she was a guest on a chat show.
     
    The rest of the grown-ups’ goody bag was different, though. Instead of chocolate and stuff, I got a voucher for a car-hire company, a little book about golf courses, and a thing like a blue credit card that helped you work out your stress levels.
    Mine said, “Relaxed.”
    The satnav said, “Now, as we cruise along the bypass, let’s take a moment to listen to a message from your host, Dr. Drax.”
     
    Hello, lucky winners. I cannot wait to see you all at our secret headquarters and I hope you’re having a comfortable journey. I ran this competition for fathers because I believe that fathers have a lot to give. My father, for instance, gave me the DraxCommunications Company. For my twelfth birthday. Bye for now.