the distance.
“Your mother is a real hoot! Do you really understand everything she says? It’s like another
language.”
Randolph says, “It is another language! And no, I never really understand half of what she’s
saying.” After a little pause and a look over the inky sea around us, he adds, “But I understand
what she means.”
After a sad little pause, I have to ask, “Is she okay? That cough ... ”
Randolph looks at me, suddenly quite, his smile melting away. “No. She’s not okay.”
Nice one, dummy, I hear that voice reprimand me from deep inside my skull. You sure know
how to kill a vibe!
Well, we all get older, I hear myself respond, it’s not like either of us thinks anybody is going
to live forever.
Ultimately, Randolph says, “She sure is a hoot though, you’re right about that.”
I let the subject go, and he doesn’t make another mention of her. Instead of getting all
wrapped up in that Freudian nightmare, I follow Randolph’s lead and look ahead, to the future.
Because it’s coming fast, whether I’m looking or not. And the past, however hard I may try
to leave it behind, keeps clinging to me; holding onto my heels like a nipping wolf with a taste
for my blood.
Later that night, I pull out some paper and a pen, deciding to give those wolves more than
merely an email. But I don’t even know if my father and brothers still share the same house,
much less if they still get the internet.
All the more reason to write them a letter, I decide. So my hand trembles a bit as I write, but
I force the issue and the tissue and begin with the familiar greeting. Everything else after that is
up for grabs.
Dearest Family:
I am doing well in Los Angeles, and wanted to take a moment to let you know not to worry
about me. I think about you often, and always with a warm heart. I hope you think of me the
same way, and that you are finding all the happiness in the world which is allotted to you by the
grace of our Lord.
When I think of you, I think of Mom; how she must be looking down on us, so happy that we
are finding our destinies, even though they may not be found under the same roof for us all.
I should take this opportunity to apologize for leaving so abruptly and without a proper
goodbye. It was just too much emotion for me to face, to say goodbye to even more of my family,
the rest of it, and for who knows how long? I hope you have found the strength to forgive me.
Yours in Christ, Addison.
Okay, I can’t say that it’s entirely genuine, thought it is for the most part. Of course I could
include, You worked me like a servant and ignored me to the point of heartbreak. I would have
left sooner if I could have, and I won’t ever come back!
But the truth is not reason enough to say something, and there is no reason for me to express
these things to my father now. It’s long past the point of making any difference.
It just doesn’t matter.
But I don’t want that stuff following me into the future. I want to go clean into that bright
and brilliant horizon, and this is the best way to do it. And I really do wish them all well, and I
do regret just leaving without so much as a kiss on the cheek. But I send the letter and let my
sadness go with it, casting it to the wind and placing it upon the alter of the Lord.
Two weeks later, Randolph and I take an American Airlines flight to Ft. Lauderdale, Florida,
to have a look at some property he may buy for a new cartel of investors. I’m more excited than
I ever thoughtI’d be to be visiting Florida, but I know it’s not the gators or the swamps or
anybody’s grandma I’m going to see. I’m learning so much as the weeks go by, every new deal
is a lesson and an adventure.
This isn’t my first time in a commercial airline, but it is my first time in First Class. The
seats are so wide and comfy, the service so friendly and fast. The shrimp cocktail is perfectly
chilled, the Champagne is sparkling and tasty, the perfect accent.
I notice Randolph
“Your mother is a real hoot! Do you really understand everything she says? It’s like another
language.”
Randolph says, “It is another language! And no, I never really understand half of what she’s
saying.” After a little pause and a look over the inky sea around us, he adds, “But I understand
what she means.”
After a sad little pause, I have to ask, “Is she okay? That cough ... ”
Randolph looks at me, suddenly quite, his smile melting away. “No. She’s not okay.”
Nice one, dummy, I hear that voice reprimand me from deep inside my skull. You sure know
how to kill a vibe!
Well, we all get older, I hear myself respond, it’s not like either of us thinks anybody is going
to live forever.
Ultimately, Randolph says, “She sure is a hoot though, you’re right about that.”
I let the subject go, and he doesn’t make another mention of her. Instead of getting all
wrapped up in that Freudian nightmare, I follow Randolph’s lead and look ahead, to the future.
Because it’s coming fast, whether I’m looking or not. And the past, however hard I may try
to leave it behind, keeps clinging to me; holding onto my heels like a nipping wolf with a taste
for my blood.
Later that night, I pull out some paper and a pen, deciding to give those wolves more than
merely an email. But I don’t even know if my father and brothers still share the same house,
much less if they still get the internet.
All the more reason to write them a letter, I decide. So my hand trembles a bit as I write, but
I force the issue and the tissue and begin with the familiar greeting. Everything else after that is
up for grabs.
Dearest Family:
I am doing well in Los Angeles, and wanted to take a moment to let you know not to worry
about me. I think about you often, and always with a warm heart. I hope you think of me the
same way, and that you are finding all the happiness in the world which is allotted to you by the
grace of our Lord.
When I think of you, I think of Mom; how she must be looking down on us, so happy that we
are finding our destinies, even though they may not be found under the same roof for us all.
I should take this opportunity to apologize for leaving so abruptly and without a proper
goodbye. It was just too much emotion for me to face, to say goodbye to even more of my family,
the rest of it, and for who knows how long? I hope you have found the strength to forgive me.
Yours in Christ, Addison.
Okay, I can’t say that it’s entirely genuine, thought it is for the most part. Of course I could
include, You worked me like a servant and ignored me to the point of heartbreak. I would have
left sooner if I could have, and I won’t ever come back!
But the truth is not reason enough to say something, and there is no reason for me to express
these things to my father now. It’s long past the point of making any difference.
It just doesn’t matter.
But I don’t want that stuff following me into the future. I want to go clean into that bright
and brilliant horizon, and this is the best way to do it. And I really do wish them all well, and I
do regret just leaving without so much as a kiss on the cheek. But I send the letter and let my
sadness go with it, casting it to the wind and placing it upon the alter of the Lord.
Two weeks later, Randolph and I take an American Airlines flight to Ft. Lauderdale, Florida,
to have a look at some property he may buy for a new cartel of investors. I’m more excited than
I ever thoughtI’d be to be visiting Florida, but I know it’s not the gators or the swamps or
anybody’s grandma I’m going to see. I’m learning so much as the weeks go by, every new deal
is a lesson and an adventure.
This isn’t my first time in a commercial airline, but it is my first time in First Class. The
seats are so wide and comfy, the service so friendly and fast. The shrimp cocktail is perfectly
chilled, the Champagne is sparkling and tasty, the perfect accent.
I notice Randolph
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