of space in the compound, so thelocals are happy to admit stragglers as long as they’re willing to toe the line and work hard.
‘Burke asked for volunteers to come back with the Angels and act as guides for future groups,’ Vinyl says. ‘A lot of the survivors in London don’t trust the Angels. They’re more likely to accept an invitation of help if someone living is involved.’
Not many people offered to become guides.Life was hard enough as it was. They faced assaults every night. They’d seen horrors in the towns and cities that they’d never forget. They were loath to return. Vinyl was one of the few who said he’d help.
‘Fancied yourself as a hero?’ I chuckle.
He pulls a face. ‘It just seemed like the right thing to do.’ I raise a mocking eyebrow and he sighs. ‘OK, the truth is, I’ve had really badnightmares since I escaped. The sort where I piss myself and wake up screaming and shaking. I thought I might be able to stop the bad dreams if I confronted my fears.’
My smile fades. I’m sorry now that I teased him. ‘Has it helped?’ I ask.
‘Not really. But once I’d made a few runs with the Angels, I felt compelled to carry on. I saw how they risked their lives for people who in somecases openly despised them. Once I was part of the gang, I didn’t feel like it would be fair to pull out.’ Vinyl grimaces. ‘Burke probably bet on that. He’s a clever sod. Not much gets by him. I’m sure he knew that once he’d got me to do one run, I wouldn’t be able to . . .’
Vinyl catches my expression and trails off into silence. ‘What’s wrong?’ he asks quietly, although he can probablyguess.
I tell him about Burke, how Mr Dowling must have messed with his mind and sent him to kill Dr Oystein, the way I scratched him while I was disarming him, holding him in my arms while he died. I can’t cry, but my voice shakes and I moan during the telling.
Vinyl stares at the ceiling glumly when I’m finished. ‘That sucks. Burke always said he’d be taken down sooner rather thanlater, that you couldn’t throw in your lot with the undead and expect to last very long. That didn’t bother him. But to be turned by one of your own, on your home turf . . .’
‘I had to do it,’ I snap. ‘He was shooting at Dr Oystein. He had to be stopped. I didn’t want to kill him. It was an accident. But he left me no choice.’
‘Easy,’ Vinyl soothes me. ‘I wasn’t having a go. I just meanit’s a pity that he couldn’t have been killed by zombies, out in the field, fighting to help a group of people to freedom. He deserved a hell of an end, not to go meekly.’
‘Yeah, well, few of us get what we deserve,’ I sniff.
‘Tell me about it,’ Vinyl sighs.
We’re silent for a while. I think about telling Vinyl that Burke was vaccinated, that we’re keeping him locked up in case heever recovers, but I’m not sure how he’d take that. Remembering what he said about his parents, I figure he might be of the opinion that it would be better to execute our old teacher. I don’t want to argue with him, so it’s easier to say nothing about it.
‘Does it change anything, Burke being dead?’ I finally ask.
‘Nah,’ Vinyl says. ‘I never saw much of him anyway. I’ll carry on thesame as usual. But I’ll miss him. He was a star.’
‘Yeah,’ I mumble. I know I shouldn’t feel horrible or guilty, but I do.
‘You couldn’t help it, B,’ Vinyl says softly, seeing the self-hatred in my eyes.
‘I know.’
‘But you feel bad anyway?’
I nod stiffly.
‘Best way to make up for it is to do what Burke would have wanted,’ Vinyl says. ‘See this lot to safety. Then returnand rescue some more of the living.’
‘Yeah. But how many more good deeds do I have to do before I stop feeling like a rat?’ I ask.
Vinyl shrugs. ‘If I knew that, I’d be a very wise man. But I’m just a guy who likes old records and hanging out with racist birds.’
‘Less of it,’ I growl as he stands
‘Burke asked for volunteers to come back with the Angels and act as guides for future groups,’ Vinyl says. ‘A lot of the survivors in London don’t trust the Angels. They’re more likely to accept an invitation of help if someone living is involved.’
Not many people offered to become guides.Life was hard enough as it was. They faced assaults every night. They’d seen horrors in the towns and cities that they’d never forget. They were loath to return. Vinyl was one of the few who said he’d help.
‘Fancied yourself as a hero?’ I chuckle.
He pulls a face. ‘It just seemed like the right thing to do.’ I raise a mocking eyebrow and he sighs. ‘OK, the truth is, I’ve had really badnightmares since I escaped. The sort where I piss myself and wake up screaming and shaking. I thought I might be able to stop the bad dreams if I confronted my fears.’
My smile fades. I’m sorry now that I teased him. ‘Has it helped?’ I ask.
‘Not really. But once I’d made a few runs with the Angels, I felt compelled to carry on. I saw how they risked their lives for people who in somecases openly despised them. Once I was part of the gang, I didn’t feel like it would be fair to pull out.’ Vinyl grimaces. ‘Burke probably bet on that. He’s a clever sod. Not much gets by him. I’m sure he knew that once he’d got me to do one run, I wouldn’t be able to . . .’
Vinyl catches my expression and trails off into silence. ‘What’s wrong?’ he asks quietly, although he can probablyguess.
I tell him about Burke, how Mr Dowling must have messed with his mind and sent him to kill Dr Oystein, the way I scratched him while I was disarming him, holding him in my arms while he died. I can’t cry, but my voice shakes and I moan during the telling.
Vinyl stares at the ceiling glumly when I’m finished. ‘That sucks. Burke always said he’d be taken down sooner rather thanlater, that you couldn’t throw in your lot with the undead and expect to last very long. That didn’t bother him. But to be turned by one of your own, on your home turf . . .’
‘I had to do it,’ I snap. ‘He was shooting at Dr Oystein. He had to be stopped. I didn’t want to kill him. It was an accident. But he left me no choice.’
‘Easy,’ Vinyl soothes me. ‘I wasn’t having a go. I just meanit’s a pity that he couldn’t have been killed by zombies, out in the field, fighting to help a group of people to freedom. He deserved a hell of an end, not to go meekly.’
‘Yeah, well, few of us get what we deserve,’ I sniff.
‘Tell me about it,’ Vinyl sighs.
We’re silent for a while. I think about telling Vinyl that Burke was vaccinated, that we’re keeping him locked up in case heever recovers, but I’m not sure how he’d take that. Remembering what he said about his parents, I figure he might be of the opinion that it would be better to execute our old teacher. I don’t want to argue with him, so it’s easier to say nothing about it.
‘Does it change anything, Burke being dead?’ I finally ask.
‘Nah,’ Vinyl says. ‘I never saw much of him anyway. I’ll carry on thesame as usual. But I’ll miss him. He was a star.’
‘Yeah,’ I mumble. I know I shouldn’t feel horrible or guilty, but I do.
‘You couldn’t help it, B,’ Vinyl says softly, seeing the self-hatred in my eyes.
‘I know.’
‘But you feel bad anyway?’
I nod stiffly.
‘Best way to make up for it is to do what Burke would have wanted,’ Vinyl says. ‘See this lot to safety. Then returnand rescue some more of the living.’
‘Yeah. But how many more good deeds do I have to do before I stop feeling like a rat?’ I ask.
Vinyl shrugs. ‘If I knew that, I’d be a very wise man. But I’m just a guy who likes old records and hanging out with racist birds.’
‘Less of it,’ I growl as he stands
Similar Books
