Read Online You’ll Understand When You’re Dead: Broken Heart Vampires Book 12 by Michele Bardsley - Free Book Online
Authors: Michele Bardsley
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over his shoulder. “Oh dear.”
Matt turned, strategically placing Natalie in front of him and looked at the balding, overweight man grinning at them.
“Y’all aren’t even newlyweds yet,” he said with a gleam in his eyes. “Better keep to hand holding in public, if you know what I mean.” He winked.
“Who the hell are you?” asked Matt, irritated by the man’s jovial interruption.
Natalie whispered, “He’s the mayor.”
“I didn’t know Broken Heart had a mayor,” said Matt.
“Oh, not of Broken Heart, son. I’m the mayor of the Little People. We have a village out past the barn on Simone and Brady’s property. “Have you met Flet? He’s the pixie. Set us up right fine.”
“You’re not little,” said Matt.
“Oh, no. I’m not. I wouldn’t be, now would I?”
“Um … no?”
“Mayor Hewitt Twinkletoes,” the man said, presenting a chubby hand. Matt maneuvered around Natalie and accepted the Mayor’s handshake. “Most folks call me Hewie.”
Twinkletoes? “What can we do for you?” asked Matt.
“Glad you asked, Mr. Dennison, glad you asked. We little people have heard of your impending nuptials. I have to say, well-timed. Well-timed, indeed, sir. Perfect as a matter of fact.” The mayor’s smile was wide and toothsome.
Uneasiness swept over Matt in a cold wave.
“Your wedding falls on one of our most cherished holidays, and there’s nothing the Little People like better than celebrating fertility.”
“Fertility,” said Matt flatly.
“And marriage,” Hewie hurriedly added. “Of course, marriage. That’s the most important part for you humans, and uh, vampires. Our community would like the opportunity to help you celebrate your hundred years of marital bliss.” The Mayor paused and flashed another terrifying smile. “We’d consider it a great honor if you and Natalie would marry in our sacred space—and that you might take on the spirits, as it were, of our god, the Great Glimmerrod and our goddess, Her Supreme Sparklenose.”
Matt opened his mouth, but no words came out. He looked down at Natalie, and her expression could only be called “flabbergasted.”
“It’s so kind of you to think of us,” said Natalie. She cleared her throat.
The mayor held up his hands. “Now, don’t say no until you’ve had some time to consider it. We do have incentives. One wish each and a sack of gold. Long as we can pry it from the leprechauns. They like to hoard, you know.”
“Why us?” asked Matt. “Wouldn’t you prefer your own little people for such a ceremony?”
Hewie had the grace to look uncomfortable. “We would, we would. But we’ve had some dissension among our folks about who gets to play the parts of Glimmerrod and Sparklenose. It was finally decided that the only way to make it fair—was to not pick anyone from our community.”
“Mr. Twinkletoes,” said Matt. He paused, but he was uncertain what to say next.
The mayor offered another wide grin. “You two think about it now. I’ll see you at the picnic later on tonight, and you can give me your answer then.”
He turned around and trundled off before Natalie or Matt could gather their composure.
NATALIE PACED BACK and forth in her living room. She flashed a look at Matt, who reclined on the couch rubbing his temples. God, how had they gotten into this mess ? I will never lie again, she swore.
She stopped wearing tread in the carpet and closed her eyes. She’d compounded Matt’s lie when she tried to use it to ward off Kenny Rogers. She would just have to take her lumps like a woman. She’d survive. “I’m so sorry, Matt. I’ll just admit that it’s all a big sham. I’ll call Bettie right now and confess.”
“It’s not your fault this whole town is crazy, Natalie.” He stood up and gathered her into his arms. “But there’s still time to break up publically, and until then...”
Natalie didn’t pull away, even though she knew she shouldn’t enjoy the way he held her. She
Matt turned, strategically placing Natalie in front of him and looked at the balding, overweight man grinning at them.
“Y’all aren’t even newlyweds yet,” he said with a gleam in his eyes. “Better keep to hand holding in public, if you know what I mean.” He winked.
“Who the hell are you?” asked Matt, irritated by the man’s jovial interruption.
Natalie whispered, “He’s the mayor.”
“I didn’t know Broken Heart had a mayor,” said Matt.
“Oh, not of Broken Heart, son. I’m the mayor of the Little People. We have a village out past the barn on Simone and Brady’s property. “Have you met Flet? He’s the pixie. Set us up right fine.”
“You’re not little,” said Matt.
“Oh, no. I’m not. I wouldn’t be, now would I?”
“Um … no?”
“Mayor Hewitt Twinkletoes,” the man said, presenting a chubby hand. Matt maneuvered around Natalie and accepted the Mayor’s handshake. “Most folks call me Hewie.”
Twinkletoes? “What can we do for you?” asked Matt.
“Glad you asked, Mr. Dennison, glad you asked. We little people have heard of your impending nuptials. I have to say, well-timed. Well-timed, indeed, sir. Perfect as a matter of fact.” The mayor’s smile was wide and toothsome.
Uneasiness swept over Matt in a cold wave.
“Your wedding falls on one of our most cherished holidays, and there’s nothing the Little People like better than celebrating fertility.”
“Fertility,” said Matt flatly.
“And marriage,” Hewie hurriedly added. “Of course, marriage. That’s the most important part for you humans, and uh, vampires. Our community would like the opportunity to help you celebrate your hundred years of marital bliss.” The Mayor paused and flashed another terrifying smile. “We’d consider it a great honor if you and Natalie would marry in our sacred space—and that you might take on the spirits, as it were, of our god, the Great Glimmerrod and our goddess, Her Supreme Sparklenose.”
Matt opened his mouth, but no words came out. He looked down at Natalie, and her expression could only be called “flabbergasted.”
“It’s so kind of you to think of us,” said Natalie. She cleared her throat.
The mayor held up his hands. “Now, don’t say no until you’ve had some time to consider it. We do have incentives. One wish each and a sack of gold. Long as we can pry it from the leprechauns. They like to hoard, you know.”
“Why us?” asked Matt. “Wouldn’t you prefer your own little people for such a ceremony?”
Hewie had the grace to look uncomfortable. “We would, we would. But we’ve had some dissension among our folks about who gets to play the parts of Glimmerrod and Sparklenose. It was finally decided that the only way to make it fair—was to not pick anyone from our community.”
“Mr. Twinkletoes,” said Matt. He paused, but he was uncertain what to say next.
The mayor offered another wide grin. “You two think about it now. I’ll see you at the picnic later on tonight, and you can give me your answer then.”
He turned around and trundled off before Natalie or Matt could gather their composure.
NATALIE PACED BACK and forth in her living room. She flashed a look at Matt, who reclined on the couch rubbing his temples. God, how had they gotten into this mess ? I will never lie again, she swore.
She stopped wearing tread in the carpet and closed her eyes. She’d compounded Matt’s lie when she tried to use it to ward off Kenny Rogers. She would just have to take her lumps like a woman. She’d survive. “I’m so sorry, Matt. I’ll just admit that it’s all a big sham. I’ll call Bettie right now and confess.”
“It’s not your fault this whole town is crazy, Natalie.” He stood up and gathered her into his arms. “But there’s still time to break up publically, and until then...”
Natalie didn’t pull away, even though she knew she shouldn’t enjoy the way he held her. She
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