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were really big, but you were – are – a very confident woman who created her own business and surrounded by tons of men – politicians, athletes, movers and shakers,” Katie said.
    Lizzie smiled wryly. “When was the last time you saw a professional athlete or a politician with a huge fatty on his arm?”
    “Hey there are men out there that like that. Chubby Chasers, I think they call them.”
    “Alison!” Katie chided.
    Lizzie half-heartedly laughed at Alison. “I suppose there are, but they weren’t traveling in the circles I was.”
    “So, this guy was coming on strong…” Katie said, leading Lizzie back to a story she didn’t want to tell. Had never told the two women to whom she told everything.
    “Right. It really shook me at first. But when he asked me out, I said yes. We went out a few times. On our third date…”
    “Ah yes, the pivotal third date,” Alison said knowingly.
    “What? What’s the third date?” Katie asked, not having been on a third date in seventeen years.
    “That’s usually the date that ‘it’ happens,” Lizzie explained.
    “That’s when you fuck,” Alison said at the same time.
    Katie frowned at Alison and motioned for Lizzie to continue.
    She took a sip of her lemonade, another deep breath, and continued. “Well, it went really well. We went back to my place. Things got pretty hot on the couch, we took it to the bedroom…and…and…” she stopped. Katie and Alison waited. Lizzie tried to just get through it. To recite what happened as if it hadn’t been her in the room. Hadn’t been her who’d suffered the incredible humiliation. “When we undressed, he lost his erection.”
    “Jesus,” Alison said as Katie gasped.
    Katie collected herself first. “There could be a thousand reasons for that,” she said. “He could have had too much to drink. He could have been tired. Lots of reasons. It’s happened to Ron. He was too tired. ”
    Lizzie had told herself that at the time of course. And t he next day, as she ate an entire Pepperidge Farm white cake. But she knew the truth. “It wasn’t that he couldn’t get it up, Kat. He was rock hard on the couch. I had him in my hand, I knew. It was when…when…when he saw me that he…he”
    “Became a limp dick – both figuratively and literally,” Alison said. Lizzie could have kissed her friend for lightening the moment.
    “What did he say?” Katie asked.
    “What could he say? He was embarrassed, tried to assure me it wasn’t me. But not too convincingly.”
    “Well of course not. Because if it’s not you it’s him, and no man’s going to admit that,” Alison said.
    Lizzie shrugged. “Whatever . We kept our distance and I put the thought of men and sex out of my mind.” She took another sip of lemonade, leaned back onto the chaise and tilted her head to the sun. “Until I met Davis Cummings,” she said quietly.
    “Yes, Davis Cummings,” Alison said. “Don’t think that we didn’t put together you’re mentioning this new guy in the Red Wing’s front office and you starting to lose weight.”
    “He was what got me thinking that there was something missing from my life, I admit. I mean, I meet this guy and on paper he’s perfect for me. And I knew I didn’t have a shot at being with him. So I start thinking about my life and what I’d accomplished and what I’d missed. That’s when I decided to get my life back.
    “Nothing may ever happen with Davis. And that’s okay. I didn’t lose weight for him, I did it for me. He – or the thought of him – may have been the impetus. But if not Davis, then someone else.”
    “So, again, why Finn ?” Katie asked.
    “Because with Finn , if we get naked and he goes soft, it will hurt, but it wouldn’t be the same as if it were Davis or someone who I really want a future with.”
    Katie and Alison seemed to accept her answer, or at least decided to give her a reprieve. Her thoughts returned to that long ago night when a man’s lack of erection