Read Online Wild Hearts (Novella) by Tina Wainscott - Free Book Online Page A

king and queen. And everyone writing in my yearbook how they expected to be invited to the wedding.”
    “So we gave them what they wanted without thinking about what we wanted. Or needed. Hell, we were kids. We didn’t even know what we wanted. We only knew what we should want: the white picket fence, two point five kids, a nice little life. But what you needed was a husband who was there emotionally. Now I know I was never going to be the guy who could give you that. I’m just not capable of it.”
    Soft, quiet tears ran down Courtney’s face. “I knew it sounded shallow, wanting a guy who was there for me while you were off at war. No one would understand that you weren’t here even when you were
here
. When I tried to bring it up, you just got angry and accused me of trying to change you.”
    “That was me being too young and reacting out of guilt.” He’d grown up fast in the SEALs, though, and had spent a lot of his precious downtime trying to figure out his marriage.
    “I knew you were an introvert, that you needed to go off by yourself sometimes. I was okay with that. I knew that you hold a part of yourself deep inside, even back in high school. You were the unreachable, untouchable Knox.”
    He’d never heard that before. “I was?”
    She nodded. “But
I
was going to be the one to reach you. Because I was seventeen and invincible. Like you said, we were kids. What did I know about reaching a man’s heart when he’d buried it so deep? Heck, I still don’t know.” She glanced at his mother, then back to him. “I suspect it has something to do with your sister’s death. I tried to make it right somehow. But I couldn’t.”
    Knox brushed her tears away. She was close to the truth. “You tried.”
    “Even when I told you I’d cheated, I wanted you to react, to show that you felt something for me. I would have taken angry. Hurt. I was hoping you’d fight for us.”
    Guilt pounded at him for not being able to give her even that. He had fought for his country. He had put a gun to a naval officer’s head and demanded that he turn around and pick up his team when the fucker was going to hightail it because there was gunfire in the area. He would have put his life on the line for any of those guys, and he’d do it for Courtney, too. But he couldn’t put his heart on the line for her. Or anyone.
    His mother pulled out the little package of tissue she always kept in her pocket and handed it to Courtney. Thankfully without saying anything.
    “You had every right to find what I couldn’t give you. I hope you and your guy are happy together. You deserve that.” Knox held out his hand, and it took her a moment to realize he was asking for the papers. Her hands were shaking as she handed them to him.
    “You mean that, don’t you?” she asked, disbelief clear on her pretty face.
    “Yeah, I do.” There was a pen clipped to the top. She’d thought of everything. He laid the papers on the railing and signed, then handed them back to her.
    She gave him a quick, hard hug. “Thank you,” she whispered, and started down the steps. Then she turned back. “I hope you find what you’re looking for, too, Knox. I hope you find the woman who can reach you.
You
deserve that.”
    No, he didn’t, but he nodded.
    Nobody spoke until she’d gotten in her car. Then they started in. “You let her off too easy,” his mother said.
    “Hell, you took the blame for the whole thing. You let her have the house, the car you bought for her.” Ethan shook his head in disgust. “All you get out of the deal is your plane.”
    The plane was plenty. Knox kept his gaze on the driveway, watching her car disappear. “It
was
my fault. I didn’t marry her because I loved her the way a man should love a woman he’s thinking about marrying.” Not the kind of passion he heard about in country songs or the hot lust he heard about in pop songs. Hell, he’d never felt that with anyone.
    His mother stepped up beside him. “Are you