against my rib cage like a wild thing. She smiles knowingly at my silence. She doesn’t fill it. She doesn’t even address it. She lets it unfurl between us, long and lingering, and I feel that vulnerability again. The nakedness I felt when Hollis left me standing alone in the crowded room. There’s nowhere to run. Nowhere to hide. I’m trapped in this moment, in her eyes, and she’s seeing me.
And like an idiot, I let her.
Like a fool, I can’t stop.
“I’m not as sinister as you think,” she promises, reading my mind.
“I don’t think you’re sinister.”
“You don’t trust me. You think I’m dangerous.”
“I think you’re beautiful,” I tell her quietly, stepping in close to her. So close I can smell her. I can feel her. Her mouth opens as she stares up at me, surprise in her eyes. Desire on her breath that I can taste on my tongue. “I think you’re smart. You’re driven and powerful. I think you’re sexy as hell and you’re not even trying, but what would it be like if you did? How absolutely and completely fucked would I be if you tried?”
She shakes her head, her eyes fast on mine. “I don’t want to fuck you,” she breathes.
“Don’t you?”
Our words are twisting. We’re losing track of what we’re saying, watching it dissolve between us, morphing into what we’re thinking. What we’re feeling.
Harper swallows her answer. I watch her long neck constrict under her skin, and I have to try very hard not to touch it. Not to press my mouth against it and feel her pulse, her life, under my lips. It’d be electric, I know it. Like kissing a live wire. It’d set me off, send me somewhere wild. Somewhere I haven’t been in years.
“Don’t you, Harper?” I repeat calmly, my heart racing in my chest. I lean closer, putting my hand on her hip, pressing my mouth to her ear. Her body stiffens when I touch her, but she doesn’t pull away. I whisper wet against her skin, “Because I do. I want to fuck you. I have since the day I met you and the feeling is only getting worse. It gets stronger every time I see you. It’s killing me right now. Do you feel it?”
I feel physical pain when she breathlessly whispers, “Yes.”
“I want you take every last inch of me, every breath I’ve got, every secret I have until I’m empty, and I’m gonna hate you for it. I’ll hate us both, and still I’ll do it, over and over again. I won’t be able to stop.” I pause, closing my eyes against the image that’s blazing through my brain. I take a steadying breath, my fingers flexing against her hip. “Is that what you want?”
“Yes.”
“You know why I won’t do it, don’t you?”
She lowers her chin, her cheek brushing against mine. Her lips against my shoulder. “Because you don’t trust me.”
It stuns me that she knows. That she’s right. My grip on her body tightens, my desire spiking irrationally, and I can’t resist. I kiss her neck just below her ear, making her shudder under my hand. When I pull away I feel dizzy. Lost. I avoid her eyes as I release her. As I push against her hip, gently sending her back several steps, silently begging her to walk away before I forget who she is and why she’s really here.
“How am I supposed to trust you if I can’t even trust myself around you?”
She frowns, her face flushed pink. Her breathing shallow. “I don’t know. But I wish you would.”
“Tell me you don’t want to know why I left California,” I challenge her. “Tell me you don’t care and I’ll believe you.”
“Kurtis—“
“Swear to me that you’ll never ask about it.”
Harper’s eyes harden. “I can’t. I’d be lying if I said I could.”
“That’s what I thought.”
“Doesn’t my honesty count for anything?”
I shake my head, refusing to look at her. Rebuilding the barriers she’s breached.
“Not nearly enough.”
CHAPTER TEN
HARPER
June 17th
Charles Windt Stadium
Los Angeles, CA
Six weeks. That’s how long Kurtis
And like an idiot, I let her.
Like a fool, I can’t stop.
“I’m not as sinister as you think,” she promises, reading my mind.
“I don’t think you’re sinister.”
“You don’t trust me. You think I’m dangerous.”
“I think you’re beautiful,” I tell her quietly, stepping in close to her. So close I can smell her. I can feel her. Her mouth opens as she stares up at me, surprise in her eyes. Desire on her breath that I can taste on my tongue. “I think you’re smart. You’re driven and powerful. I think you’re sexy as hell and you’re not even trying, but what would it be like if you did? How absolutely and completely fucked would I be if you tried?”
She shakes her head, her eyes fast on mine. “I don’t want to fuck you,” she breathes.
“Don’t you?”
Our words are twisting. We’re losing track of what we’re saying, watching it dissolve between us, morphing into what we’re thinking. What we’re feeling.
Harper swallows her answer. I watch her long neck constrict under her skin, and I have to try very hard not to touch it. Not to press my mouth against it and feel her pulse, her life, under my lips. It’d be electric, I know it. Like kissing a live wire. It’d set me off, send me somewhere wild. Somewhere I haven’t been in years.
“Don’t you, Harper?” I repeat calmly, my heart racing in my chest. I lean closer, putting my hand on her hip, pressing my mouth to her ear. Her body stiffens when I touch her, but she doesn’t pull away. I whisper wet against her skin, “Because I do. I want to fuck you. I have since the day I met you and the feeling is only getting worse. It gets stronger every time I see you. It’s killing me right now. Do you feel it?”
I feel physical pain when she breathlessly whispers, “Yes.”
“I want you take every last inch of me, every breath I’ve got, every secret I have until I’m empty, and I’m gonna hate you for it. I’ll hate us both, and still I’ll do it, over and over again. I won’t be able to stop.” I pause, closing my eyes against the image that’s blazing through my brain. I take a steadying breath, my fingers flexing against her hip. “Is that what you want?”
“Yes.”
“You know why I won’t do it, don’t you?”
She lowers her chin, her cheek brushing against mine. Her lips against my shoulder. “Because you don’t trust me.”
It stuns me that she knows. That she’s right. My grip on her body tightens, my desire spiking irrationally, and I can’t resist. I kiss her neck just below her ear, making her shudder under my hand. When I pull away I feel dizzy. Lost. I avoid her eyes as I release her. As I push against her hip, gently sending her back several steps, silently begging her to walk away before I forget who she is and why she’s really here.
“How am I supposed to trust you if I can’t even trust myself around you?”
She frowns, her face flushed pink. Her breathing shallow. “I don’t know. But I wish you would.”
“Tell me you don’t want to know why I left California,” I challenge her. “Tell me you don’t care and I’ll believe you.”
“Kurtis—“
“Swear to me that you’ll never ask about it.”
Harper’s eyes harden. “I can’t. I’d be lying if I said I could.”
“That’s what I thought.”
“Doesn’t my honesty count for anything?”
I shake my head, refusing to look at her. Rebuilding the barriers she’s breached.
“Not nearly enough.”
CHAPTER TEN
HARPER
June 17th
Charles Windt Stadium
Los Angeles, CA
Six weeks. That’s how long Kurtis
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