Read Online When Parents Text: So Much Said...So Little Understood by Sophia Fraioli, Lauren Kaelin - Free Book Online
Authors: Sophia Fraioli, Lauren Kaelin
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is.
Mustache
----
ME : Karina says you have a pretty epic mustache.
----
DAD : Its called beowulf.
It Could Happen
----
MOM : I took a new sleeping pill tonight. It says i may drive, eat, or have sex without knowing it.
----
ME : Uhhh…
----
MOM : Night!
Deer I Fear
----
DAD : hunting in tree.. luv u lots
----
ME : have fun
----
DAD : dont txt me bck idiot!!!! DEER r NEAR I FEAR.. turning fone off
ENTERTAINMENT
Sophia:
My mom owns every season of
Mad Men.
Not to mention a themed hat and calendar. We’re a family that loves entertainment. Though most of our days are spent out of the house, we always find time at night to catch up on our DVR and watch reruns of
Seinfeld.
Unfortunately, while I was away at college, our yearly ritual of watching the Oscars had to be altered. Instead of making a bag of popcorn, betting on our favorites, and picking our own best dressed, our exchanges were limited to texting.
“Oh my god, look at how sexy John Hamm looks in his suit, with his beard!” was just one of the many gems I got from my mother on Oscar night.
Though this year we got to watch together again, I somehow missed the little one-liner messages sent to my inbox after every winner was announced.
Oprah
----
MOM : I watch Oprah, I feel like noting is impossible.
The K Drug
----
ME : Are you watching the game?
----
DAD : Saw a little. Are you watching it? Mom says to take your temperature!
----
ME : What my temperature???
----
DAD : Wooohooo! 41 to 26
----
ME : Haha. Why did mom say that?
----
DAD : She thinks you might be sick if you are watching Celtics. She wants meto watch Kardashians. NFW!!!
----
ME : Haha. Do it! So funny! Tell her it’s what I do to go to sleep. Unlimited on netflix!!!!!
----
DAD : OMG. The K drug. They should use it for anesthesia.
Radio Disney
----
DAD : My life is over- they took ESPN sports radio off the air and replaced it with RADIO DISNEY. Feels like hannah montana stabbed me thru the heart with a mickey mouse pearl handles dagger
The Situation
----
ME : I am currently in the presence of some of the Jersey Shore cast members.
----
MOM : ARE YOU IN JAIL???
Wanted to Share
----
MOM : Turn on A&E
----
ME : I can’t. I’m not at home. What’s on?
----
MOM : It was a show about morbidly obese people and I wanted to share it with you
Yoda
----
ME : can you pick me up around 2 at school?
----
DAD : yeah, where?
----
ME : At school!
----
DAD : Yoda is my hero. He is your hero. He should be everyone’s hero. He is the symbol of positive thinking. Be safe and may the force be with you. See you at two. Love daddy
Jeggings
----
ME : please look at the website whenparentstext.com
----
MOM : dad went to look. he says he doesn’t get it
----
ME : hahahahah are you serious? What don’t you get
----
MOM : Turn on conan. He’s wearing jeggings.
Miley
----
MOM : I wanna buy a new cd. Recommendation off of the top of your head?
(two minutes later)
----
MOM : You’re not fast enough. Bought Miley Cyrus. She can’t be tamed.
Serious Discussion
----
MOM : are u free
----
ME : i’m at work i don’t have any cell service
----
MOM : it’s about lil wayne
Unstoppable
----
DAD : Lady GaGa is unstoppable.
----
ME : You know who Lady GaGa is?
----
DAD : Top of the charts in two weeks
Wolves I
----
MOM : come home and let’s watch that movie where the wolves attack?
----
ME : I think you mean eclipse
----
ME : and…..no.
The Worst
----
DAD : Fucking Carrot Top is here
Wolves II
----
DAD : eclipse just got here. do u want me 2 save it 4 u?
----
ME : why are you watching that?
----
DAD : the wolves remind me of our dogs
JB
----
MOM : We R kewl parents now
----
ME : haha why?
----
(one hour later)
----
ME : mom where are you and dad?
----
(one hour later)
----
MOM : JB is so hot.
----
ME : Justin Beiber?
----
MOM : James Blunt.
----
MOM : Went to Boston and
Mustache
----
ME : Karina says you have a pretty epic mustache.
----
DAD : Its called beowulf.
It Could Happen
----
MOM : I took a new sleeping pill tonight. It says i may drive, eat, or have sex without knowing it.
----
ME : Uhhh…
----
MOM : Night!
Deer I Fear
----
DAD : hunting in tree.. luv u lots
----
ME : have fun
----
DAD : dont txt me bck idiot!!!! DEER r NEAR I FEAR.. turning fone off
ENTERTAINMENT
Sophia:
My mom owns every season of
Mad Men.
Not to mention a themed hat and calendar. We’re a family that loves entertainment. Though most of our days are spent out of the house, we always find time at night to catch up on our DVR and watch reruns of
Seinfeld.
Unfortunately, while I was away at college, our yearly ritual of watching the Oscars had to be altered. Instead of making a bag of popcorn, betting on our favorites, and picking our own best dressed, our exchanges were limited to texting.
“Oh my god, look at how sexy John Hamm looks in his suit, with his beard!” was just one of the many gems I got from my mother on Oscar night.
Though this year we got to watch together again, I somehow missed the little one-liner messages sent to my inbox after every winner was announced.
Oprah
----
MOM : I watch Oprah, I feel like noting is impossible.
The K Drug
----
ME : Are you watching the game?
----
DAD : Saw a little. Are you watching it? Mom says to take your temperature!
----
ME : What my temperature???
----
DAD : Wooohooo! 41 to 26
----
ME : Haha. Why did mom say that?
----
DAD : She thinks you might be sick if you are watching Celtics. She wants meto watch Kardashians. NFW!!!
----
ME : Haha. Do it! So funny! Tell her it’s what I do to go to sleep. Unlimited on netflix!!!!!
----
DAD : OMG. The K drug. They should use it for anesthesia.
Radio Disney
----
DAD : My life is over- they took ESPN sports radio off the air and replaced it with RADIO DISNEY. Feels like hannah montana stabbed me thru the heart with a mickey mouse pearl handles dagger
The Situation
----
ME : I am currently in the presence of some of the Jersey Shore cast members.
----
MOM : ARE YOU IN JAIL???
Wanted to Share
----
MOM : Turn on A&E
----
ME : I can’t. I’m not at home. What’s on?
----
MOM : It was a show about morbidly obese people and I wanted to share it with you
Yoda
----
ME : can you pick me up around 2 at school?
----
DAD : yeah, where?
----
ME : At school!
----
DAD : Yoda is my hero. He is your hero. He should be everyone’s hero. He is the symbol of positive thinking. Be safe and may the force be with you. See you at two. Love daddy
Jeggings
----
ME : please look at the website whenparentstext.com
----
MOM : dad went to look. he says he doesn’t get it
----
ME : hahahahah are you serious? What don’t you get
----
MOM : Turn on conan. He’s wearing jeggings.
Miley
----
MOM : I wanna buy a new cd. Recommendation off of the top of your head?
(two minutes later)
----
MOM : You’re not fast enough. Bought Miley Cyrus. She can’t be tamed.
Serious Discussion
----
MOM : are u free
----
ME : i’m at work i don’t have any cell service
----
MOM : it’s about lil wayne
Unstoppable
----
DAD : Lady GaGa is unstoppable.
----
ME : You know who Lady GaGa is?
----
DAD : Top of the charts in two weeks
Wolves I
----
MOM : come home and let’s watch that movie where the wolves attack?
----
ME : I think you mean eclipse
----
ME : and…..no.
The Worst
----
DAD : Fucking Carrot Top is here
Wolves II
----
DAD : eclipse just got here. do u want me 2 save it 4 u?
----
ME : why are you watching that?
----
DAD : the wolves remind me of our dogs
JB
----
MOM : We R kewl parents now
----
ME : haha why?
----
(one hour later)
----
ME : mom where are you and dad?
----
(one hour later)
----
MOM : JB is so hot.
----
ME : Justin Beiber?
----
MOM : James Blunt.
----
MOM : Went to Boston and
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