Read Online What is Mine by Anne Holt - Free Book Online

letters,” she said slowly, putting her bag on her shoulder.
    “And those are?”
    The nurse had opened the bed covers and was about to roll the monstrous metal construction out onto the floor.
    “When I’m afraid of not getting a reply,” said Johanne. “No reply is an answer in itself. Nothing means ‘no.’ I don’t dare risk that. Not from Aksel Seier. I’m flying out on Monday. I . . .”
    The nurse caught her eye.
    “Yes, yes,” mumbled Johanne. “I’ll leave now. Maybe I’ll call you, Alvhild. From America. If I have anything to tell, that is. I hope that everything is fine . . . well, as good as it can be in the meantime.”
    Without thinking, she bent over the old lady and gave her a gentle kiss on the cheek. Her skin felt dry and cold. Once she was well out of the house, she used her tongue to moisten her lips again. They tasted of nothing; just dry.

F OURTEEN

    E milie had been given a present. A Barbie doll with hair that was curled up inside her head so you could pull it out and then wind it back in with a key on her neck. The doll had nice clothes, a pink sequined dress that came in the same box as the doll and a set of cowboy clothes as an extra present. Emilie played with the cowboy hat. Barbie was lying on the bed beside her with her legs splayed. She didn’t have a Barbie doll at home. Mommy didn’t like toys like that. Nor did Daddy, and in any case, Emilie was too big for things like that now. At least, that’s what Auntie Beate said.
    Auntie Beate was probably angry with Daddy now. She probably thought it was his fault that Emilie had disappeared, even though she was only walking home from school, like she had so many times before without anyone coming and stealing her away. Daddy couldn’t keep an eye on her all the time. Even Auntie Beate had said that.
    “Daddy . . .”
    “I can be your daddy.”
    The man was standing in the doorway. He must be crazy. Emilie knew a lot about crazy people. Torill down the road in Number 14 was so crazy that she had to go to the hospital all the time. Her children had to live with their grandparents because their mom sometimes thought she was a cannibal. And then she would light a bonfire in the garden and want to roast Guttorm and Gustav on spits. Once Torill rang the bell in the middle of the night; Emilie woke up and followed Daddy down to see who it was. Guttorm and Gustav’s mother was standing there stark naked, with red stripes all over her body, and wanted to borrow the freezer. Emilie was hurried off to bed and didn’t really know what happened next, but it was a long, long time until anyone saw Torill again.
    “You’re not my daddy,” whispered Emilie. “My daddy is named Tønnes. You don’t even look like him.”
    The man looked at her. His eyes were scary, even though he had quite a nice face. He must be crazy.
    Pettersen in the green block was crazy in a different way from Torill. Mommy used to say that Torill wouldn’t hurt a fly, but it was different with Pettersen in the green block. Emilie thought it wasn’t quite true to say that Torill wouldn’t hurt a fly when she actually wanted to roast her own children on a fire. But Pettersen was worse, all the same. He had been to prison for messing around with young children. Emilie knew what messing around meant. Auntie Beate had told her.
    “I’m sure we’ll be friends one day,” said the man, and grabbed the Barbie doll. “Were you pleased to get this?”
    Emilie didn’t answer. It was difficult to breathe in here. Maybe she had used up all the air; something was pressing on her chest and she was dizzy all the time. People need oxygen. When you breathe you use up the oxygen so the air becomes empty and useless, in a way. That’s what Auntie Beate had explained to her. That was why it was so horrible to hide under a duvet. After a while you just had to lift up a corner to get some oxygen. Even if it was a big room, she had been there a long time. It felt like years. She