Read Online Until There Was You by J.J. Bamber - Free Book Online Page A
Authors: J.J. Bamber
Tags: Contemporary, gay romance
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going over and over it in my mind, it's just making me sick and, you know, I don't know what will happen tomorrow. It's gonna be a big day and I have to be strong for Bay. He's gonna need some serious ninja support, and I can't give him that when I keep bursting into tears." Nate gave his words real weight so they adopted the rhythm of a battle cry. One of the most pathetic battle cries in history, but a battle cry nonetheless.
Cecily smiled. "I think you're an incredibly strong person. And when you're a naturally strong person, you have a responsibility to yourself to keep on being strong. You have to respect your strength, no matter what happens."
They both got up from the sofa and washed their glasses in the sink. Nate yawned deeply, feeling tiredness inside of his bones. He unfurled his long body into a stretch, loosening the tension and sadness that had restricted his body. "I love you, Cici. I don't know what I would've done without you here. I don't know where I would have gone." He paused and smiled as he began to ascend the stairs. "I just wanted you to know that."
Cecily blew him a kiss. "I love you too."
Nate locked the bathroom door behind him and pulled out his phone. Two messages, but neither from Joshua. He began to dial and waited for the click of Joshua's voicemail message. Nate turned the tap on to drown out his quiet words in case they travelled.
"Umm. Hey, Joshua, it's me again. By me, I mean Nate. I just wanted to let you know that we have to move all of our stuff out tomorrow—at ten a.m., it will no longer be our house. Officially, it won't belong to us anymore. So if you want me, or you want to see Bailey, then you'll have to call. Because I don't know where we'll be. I'm having a little bit of trouble finding a place for us and we can't stay at Cici's… there's no room. So I feel like I'm just gonna have to get in the car tomorrow and drive somewhere, anywhere. I just wanted you to know that. If you want some of your stuff, like your sleeping T-shirt—how are sleeping without your sleeping T-shirt? I remember when we had to drive back home from our vacation because you had forgotten it and you couldn't sleep all night!
"Anyway—if you give me a forwarding address, then I can send you the stuff. I won't turn up at your place like some crazy stalker. Otherwise I'm putting a lot of it in storage and taking some with me. Bailey's fine… He's asking about you a lot; he misses you. I miss you, but he really misses you." Nate felt a tear roll down his cheek and his voice cracked a little. He'd promised himself that he wasn't going to do this again, that he would sound strong and confident. He inhaled deeply and paced for a second, gaining the courage to speak again, to be the kind of leader that he knew Bailey needed him to be. "Anyway, get in touch and we'll figure something out. I hope you're doing all right."
Nate could feel anger rising up his body. He felt abandoned and hopeless and he wanted to lash out at something. He filled the sink basin with cold water and plunged his face into it. He wanted to embrace Joshua and punch him at the same time. He dried his face and then leaned against the basin, breathing for a few seconds to calm his nerves.
Nate unlocked the door and went into his bedroom. Bailey was awake, his bright eyes illuminated by the steady glow of traffic outside.
"Why are you still awake, silly? You should've been asleep hours ago. What have you been doing all of this time?" Nate asked in a whisper.
"I've been waiting for you! I thought it would be a surprise," Bailey said with a yawn, his little body expanding and contracting with the show of tiredness. It made Nate's heart crack open a little.
Nate put on his pajamas and got into the bed. He felt a little peace when Bailey put his head on his chest. Their breathing grew comfortable and rhythmic together.
"Bailey?" Nate asked, interrupting the perfect silence.
"Yes, Dad?" Bailey said, obviously tired and muffled slightly
Cecily smiled. "I think you're an incredibly strong person. And when you're a naturally strong person, you have a responsibility to yourself to keep on being strong. You have to respect your strength, no matter what happens."
They both got up from the sofa and washed their glasses in the sink. Nate yawned deeply, feeling tiredness inside of his bones. He unfurled his long body into a stretch, loosening the tension and sadness that had restricted his body. "I love you, Cici. I don't know what I would've done without you here. I don't know where I would have gone." He paused and smiled as he began to ascend the stairs. "I just wanted you to know that."
Cecily blew him a kiss. "I love you too."
Nate locked the bathroom door behind him and pulled out his phone. Two messages, but neither from Joshua. He began to dial and waited for the click of Joshua's voicemail message. Nate turned the tap on to drown out his quiet words in case they travelled.
"Umm. Hey, Joshua, it's me again. By me, I mean Nate. I just wanted to let you know that we have to move all of our stuff out tomorrow—at ten a.m., it will no longer be our house. Officially, it won't belong to us anymore. So if you want me, or you want to see Bailey, then you'll have to call. Because I don't know where we'll be. I'm having a little bit of trouble finding a place for us and we can't stay at Cici's… there's no room. So I feel like I'm just gonna have to get in the car tomorrow and drive somewhere, anywhere. I just wanted you to know that. If you want some of your stuff, like your sleeping T-shirt—how are sleeping without your sleeping T-shirt? I remember when we had to drive back home from our vacation because you had forgotten it and you couldn't sleep all night!
"Anyway—if you give me a forwarding address, then I can send you the stuff. I won't turn up at your place like some crazy stalker. Otherwise I'm putting a lot of it in storage and taking some with me. Bailey's fine… He's asking about you a lot; he misses you. I miss you, but he really misses you." Nate felt a tear roll down his cheek and his voice cracked a little. He'd promised himself that he wasn't going to do this again, that he would sound strong and confident. He inhaled deeply and paced for a second, gaining the courage to speak again, to be the kind of leader that he knew Bailey needed him to be. "Anyway, get in touch and we'll figure something out. I hope you're doing all right."
Nate could feel anger rising up his body. He felt abandoned and hopeless and he wanted to lash out at something. He filled the sink basin with cold water and plunged his face into it. He wanted to embrace Joshua and punch him at the same time. He dried his face and then leaned against the basin, breathing for a few seconds to calm his nerves.
Nate unlocked the door and went into his bedroom. Bailey was awake, his bright eyes illuminated by the steady glow of traffic outside.
"Why are you still awake, silly? You should've been asleep hours ago. What have you been doing all of this time?" Nate asked in a whisper.
"I've been waiting for you! I thought it would be a surprise," Bailey said with a yawn, his little body expanding and contracting with the show of tiredness. It made Nate's heart crack open a little.
Nate put on his pajamas and got into the bed. He felt a little peace when Bailey put his head on his chest. Their breathing grew comfortable and rhythmic together.
"Bailey?" Nate asked, interrupting the perfect silence.
"Yes, Dad?" Bailey said, obviously tired and muffled slightly
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