Read Online Unidentified Funny Objects 2 by Robert Silverberg, Jim C. Hines, Jody Lynn Nye, Mike Resnick, Ken Liu, Tim Pratt, Esther Frisner - Free Book Online Page B
Authors: Robert Silverberg, Jim C. Hines, Jody Lynn Nye, Mike Resnick, Ken Liu, Tim Pratt, Esther Frisner
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was almost out of time.” Time… “The university.”
“What?”
Stranger was already rising into the sky. “She’s going after Professor Edison at Lake City University.”
For the past two years, Edric Edison had been working on what he called “magnetic time.” He argued that true time travel was currently impossible, due to the immense computational difficulties in navigating both time and space simultaneously. Travel backward even a single minute, and the entire universe moved around you, leaving you sucking vacuum. But if you treated an object as four-dimensional, an unbroken solid stretching through time, you could yank a future or past version of that object into the present. As long as you had the original to use as an anchor.
How many past and future Scaramouches would she create? She would delight in the paradoxes, and an army of sociopathic geniuses would be unstoppable.
Police cars blocked the street in front of Edison’s building. A crowd pressed around the wooden barriers by the entrance. They exploded into cheers when they spotted him.
He landed harder than he had planned, cracking the blacktop. Damned peripheral neuropathy. At this point, he doubted he’d ever get full feeling back in his extremities. He searched for the nearest uniformed officer. “What happened?”
“Professor Edison is gone, and his lab was ransacked,” stammered a young rookie whose nametag read Conroy . “We’re glad you’re here, Stranger. You look good. I mean, you don’t look sick . Not that I’m a doctor. And I know your costume hides everything, but… you just don’t look like someone who’s dying.”
“Tell him about the superpoop!”
“We love you!” shouted a man near the back of the crowd.
“We know you’ll beat this!”
“You’re so strong!”
“Strong?” Stranger turned to face the woman who had spoken. “You think these malicious lumps of flesh cannibalizing my body make me strong? ”
“Temper, temper!”
“Not the cancer,” she said. “The way you’re facing it. Your courage and dignity are an inspiration to the whole city.”
Stranger strode toward her. “You all know I disappeared for two weeks in March.” He heard his voice rising, but he couldn’t stop his anger any more than he could have held back his eruption at the asylum. “I gathered a sphere of air around myself and flew to the dark side of the moon. Do you know what I did there?”
The crowd shifted uncomfortably.
“I cried like an Earth baby. And then I punched the fucking moon. Do those sound like the actions of a strong, courageous, dignified man?” He stomped toward the entrance. “I need to question Edison’s lab.”
“There’s more,” the police officer said, weakly. Stranger sighed, knowing from experience what he was about to say. “Scaramouche has also kidnapped Kelly Kane.”
JARHEAD PURSED HIS LIPS. “Some would say the courage isn’t about your breakdown, but about your choice to come back afterward.”
“Where else was I supposed to go? My own world blew up, remember? Besides, the moon’s boring. Nothing happens there but the occasional meteoroid strike. You want to know what a conversation with the moon sounds like? ‘Ouch. Ouch. Ouch.’ It gets old fast.”
“Have you considered a brain-jar? It’s not as bad as you’d think.” Jarhead began to pace back and forth on the desk, carried by the spider-like metal legs on the base of his jar.
“Even if we could cut off my head, and even if your technology could be adapted for alien biology, it’s too late. The cancer metastasized through my body. It would just follow my head into the jar and kill me there.” Stranger shifted in his chair, trying to find a position that didn’t aggravate the aches in his joints. “Everyone wants to help. Scaramouche is the only one to come up with a solution that might work…”
THE AIRPORT WAS EMPTY when Stranger arrived. Police and airport security had pulled everyone back a full five
“What?”
Stranger was already rising into the sky. “She’s going after Professor Edison at Lake City University.”
For the past two years, Edric Edison had been working on what he called “magnetic time.” He argued that true time travel was currently impossible, due to the immense computational difficulties in navigating both time and space simultaneously. Travel backward even a single minute, and the entire universe moved around you, leaving you sucking vacuum. But if you treated an object as four-dimensional, an unbroken solid stretching through time, you could yank a future or past version of that object into the present. As long as you had the original to use as an anchor.
How many past and future Scaramouches would she create? She would delight in the paradoxes, and an army of sociopathic geniuses would be unstoppable.
Police cars blocked the street in front of Edison’s building. A crowd pressed around the wooden barriers by the entrance. They exploded into cheers when they spotted him.
He landed harder than he had planned, cracking the blacktop. Damned peripheral neuropathy. At this point, he doubted he’d ever get full feeling back in his extremities. He searched for the nearest uniformed officer. “What happened?”
“Professor Edison is gone, and his lab was ransacked,” stammered a young rookie whose nametag read Conroy . “We’re glad you’re here, Stranger. You look good. I mean, you don’t look sick . Not that I’m a doctor. And I know your costume hides everything, but… you just don’t look like someone who’s dying.”
“Tell him about the superpoop!”
“We love you!” shouted a man near the back of the crowd.
“We know you’ll beat this!”
“You’re so strong!”
“Strong?” Stranger turned to face the woman who had spoken. “You think these malicious lumps of flesh cannibalizing my body make me strong? ”
“Temper, temper!”
“Not the cancer,” she said. “The way you’re facing it. Your courage and dignity are an inspiration to the whole city.”
Stranger strode toward her. “You all know I disappeared for two weeks in March.” He heard his voice rising, but he couldn’t stop his anger any more than he could have held back his eruption at the asylum. “I gathered a sphere of air around myself and flew to the dark side of the moon. Do you know what I did there?”
The crowd shifted uncomfortably.
“I cried like an Earth baby. And then I punched the fucking moon. Do those sound like the actions of a strong, courageous, dignified man?” He stomped toward the entrance. “I need to question Edison’s lab.”
“There’s more,” the police officer said, weakly. Stranger sighed, knowing from experience what he was about to say. “Scaramouche has also kidnapped Kelly Kane.”
JARHEAD PURSED HIS LIPS. “Some would say the courage isn’t about your breakdown, but about your choice to come back afterward.”
“Where else was I supposed to go? My own world blew up, remember? Besides, the moon’s boring. Nothing happens there but the occasional meteoroid strike. You want to know what a conversation with the moon sounds like? ‘Ouch. Ouch. Ouch.’ It gets old fast.”
“Have you considered a brain-jar? It’s not as bad as you’d think.” Jarhead began to pace back and forth on the desk, carried by the spider-like metal legs on the base of his jar.
“Even if we could cut off my head, and even if your technology could be adapted for alien biology, it’s too late. The cancer metastasized through my body. It would just follow my head into the jar and kill me there.” Stranger shifted in his chair, trying to find a position that didn’t aggravate the aches in his joints. “Everyone wants to help. Scaramouche is the only one to come up with a solution that might work…”
THE AIRPORT WAS EMPTY when Stranger arrived. Police and airport security had pulled everyone back a full five
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