door handle. "Thank you for helping tonight. We couldn't have done this without you."
"Maggie, wait."
She shook her head. "No, Michael. It isn't you. It's me."
With that, she slipped out of the van, leaving him alone to ponder what he had learned about himself and about Maggie. The panic in her eyes said it all, and yet he felt like it created more questions.
* * *
Maggie sat behind her desk for thirty minutes, contemplating what had happened in the van. In her limited experience, that had definitely been a "moment." And she didn't need that, not now, and not with Michael. She was focused on the youth group, which didn't leave room for "moments." Michael obviously had his own issues to deal with.
She called Faith, doodling on paper as she waited for her friend to answer.
"Hey," Faith answered, sounding distracted.
"Hey, to you, too. What are you doing?"
"Writing."
"Oh."
"Sweetie, what's the matter?"
Maggie threw a wadded-up piece of paper at the trash can. That didn't help. She wadded up another and tossed it harder, the force making it bounce off the side of the can. "I'm such an idiot."
"What does that mean?"
She opened the drawer of her desk and pulled out the giant-size Reese's that she'd bought the day before. "I'm an idiot because I'm going to believe in this guy and then he's going to walk away."
"He'd better not hurt you." Faith, always ready to fight when a fight wasn't needed.
"That isn't what I mean. I mean, I'm going to end up letting him into my life and then he's going to leave. He'll get tired of working here with the kids. Or he'll get tired of this life and realize there are other things he can do. This really isn't his world. I think he's just a temporary visitor." She contemplated the peanut-butter cup and how good it would taste before she shoved it back in the drawer. "And he might fall back into his old habits."
Her biggest fear.
She couldn't admit to Faith that she had been tempted, just for a moment, to let him invade her personal space. How long had it been since that had happened?
"Maybe you should see him as a man and not a project. Remember, projects are my hobby. He isn't one of your kids. He probably isn't looking for a glass of milk and chocolate-chip cookies."
She rubbed a hand over her eyes. "I've already made that mistake once, or maybe twice, trying to change someone who didn't really want to be changed."
"Maggie, he isn't your mom. And he isn't Greg."
"Well, I'm not going to be the victim again."
"There you go, that's my friend Maggie talking. You're strong, you're a hero to so many people. Look at the lives you've changed at church with your milk and cookies."
Maggie laughed and the tightness around her heart eased.
"Aren't you the encouraging optimist?"
"No, I'm very jaded. That's why we're such good friends. I see black and white. You see lovely shades of rose. And I love you for that. I love that you believe in all those kids. I'm not so sure that I love that you're starting to see Michael Carson as one of them. He isn't."
No, Michael definitely wasn't one of the kids. Maggie started to tell Faith how very aware of that fact she was, but she didn't. She could expect the best for her kids, they were easy. She saw possibilities for a better future in each one of them. Michael only raised questions.
"Why don't you come over for coffee and we'll do some nice, safe online shopping?"
Maggie nodded, but something outside the window caught her attention. She froze as a shiver of fear slid up her spine and lingered in her scalp.
"Maggie?"
She couldn't answer, not when a shadow flitted across the window. Instead she gasped and slid beneath her desk.
"Maggie?"
"There's someone out there."
"I'm calling the police. I'll use my cell phone and you stay on this line with me."
"No, I don't want the police. What if it's a neighbor looking for a cat?"
"Maggie, respectfully shut up."
Not a problem. Besides that, she was shaking too hard to argue. Someone was out there.
"Maggie, wait."
She shook her head. "No, Michael. It isn't you. It's me."
With that, she slipped out of the van, leaving him alone to ponder what he had learned about himself and about Maggie. The panic in her eyes said it all, and yet he felt like it created more questions.
* * *
Maggie sat behind her desk for thirty minutes, contemplating what had happened in the van. In her limited experience, that had definitely been a "moment." And she didn't need that, not now, and not with Michael. She was focused on the youth group, which didn't leave room for "moments." Michael obviously had his own issues to deal with.
She called Faith, doodling on paper as she waited for her friend to answer.
"Hey," Faith answered, sounding distracted.
"Hey, to you, too. What are you doing?"
"Writing."
"Oh."
"Sweetie, what's the matter?"
Maggie threw a wadded-up piece of paper at the trash can. That didn't help. She wadded up another and tossed it harder, the force making it bounce off the side of the can. "I'm such an idiot."
"What does that mean?"
She opened the drawer of her desk and pulled out the giant-size Reese's that she'd bought the day before. "I'm an idiot because I'm going to believe in this guy and then he's going to walk away."
"He'd better not hurt you." Faith, always ready to fight when a fight wasn't needed.
"That isn't what I mean. I mean, I'm going to end up letting him into my life and then he's going to leave. He'll get tired of working here with the kids. Or he'll get tired of this life and realize there are other things he can do. This really isn't his world. I think he's just a temporary visitor." She contemplated the peanut-butter cup and how good it would taste before she shoved it back in the drawer. "And he might fall back into his old habits."
Her biggest fear.
She couldn't admit to Faith that she had been tempted, just for a moment, to let him invade her personal space. How long had it been since that had happened?
"Maybe you should see him as a man and not a project. Remember, projects are my hobby. He isn't one of your kids. He probably isn't looking for a glass of milk and chocolate-chip cookies."
She rubbed a hand over her eyes. "I've already made that mistake once, or maybe twice, trying to change someone who didn't really want to be changed."
"Maggie, he isn't your mom. And he isn't Greg."
"Well, I'm not going to be the victim again."
"There you go, that's my friend Maggie talking. You're strong, you're a hero to so many people. Look at the lives you've changed at church with your milk and cookies."
Maggie laughed and the tightness around her heart eased.
"Aren't you the encouraging optimist?"
"No, I'm very jaded. That's why we're such good friends. I see black and white. You see lovely shades of rose. And I love you for that. I love that you believe in all those kids. I'm not so sure that I love that you're starting to see Michael Carson as one of them. He isn't."
No, Michael definitely wasn't one of the kids. Maggie started to tell Faith how very aware of that fact she was, but she didn't. She could expect the best for her kids, they were easy. She saw possibilities for a better future in each one of them. Michael only raised questions.
"Why don't you come over for coffee and we'll do some nice, safe online shopping?"
Maggie nodded, but something outside the window caught her attention. She froze as a shiver of fear slid up her spine and lingered in her scalp.
"Maggie?"
She couldn't answer, not when a shadow flitted across the window. Instead she gasped and slid beneath her desk.
"Maggie?"
"There's someone out there."
"I'm calling the police. I'll use my cell phone and you stay on this line with me."
"No, I don't want the police. What if it's a neighbor looking for a cat?"
"Maggie, respectfully shut up."
Not a problem. Besides that, she was shaking too hard to argue. Someone was out there.
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