Read Online TRACELESS by Helen Kay Dimon - Free Book Online Page B

thumb the back of her hand. “It could be anything. I’ve worked on a lot of cases. Made many enemies.”
    Rather than battle him about the kidnapping and how he could not have predicted it or prevented it from his office in Maryland, she let it drop. He was determined to take on the blame for what happened to her and no amount of arguing would change his mind. And they needed all of their energy to reason this through.
    She cradled his hand in both of hers. “But why now? Did something happen with a case back home?”
    “No.”
    “So you guys have all just been sitting around the family room staring at each other? Drinking beer and watching football?”
    “Hardly.”
    Part of her knew that. Up until recently he used a portion of their telephone calls to talk about the team. He filled her in on Ben and the change in Davis since his marriage. Connor walked her through cases, skipping over details but letting her know what they were all working on.
    Being included, even to that small extent, made her ache for home. He kept so much to himself, but he never hid the operations from her. He included her in the conversations. Letting her leave the house without an armed guard was a different thing.
    “I’m not hedging.” Connor frowned at her. “Nothing out of the ordinary.”
    As if this man or anyone on the team understood the concept of normal. “What does that mean?”
    “I don’t know, Jana.” He dropped her hand and stood up again. “The usual stuff. Chasing bad guys, ducking gunfire, racing against time.”
    She almost laughed. She went with slumping her shoulders and letting some of the tension run out of her instead. “That list sounds crazy.”
    “I know.” He braced a palm against the edge of the rock entrance. He traced a pattern in the dirt with the toe of his shoe. “Laying it out sounds cloak-and-dagger, maybe a bit too Hollywood.”
    “You hate that.”
    “But the danger is very real. That’s part of why I don’t discuss the details or do anything that would have you wading into danger.” He scoffed. “I guess I failed there since you were tied to a chair a few hours ago.”
    “No, it’s not.”
    His head shot up and he faced her again. “Excuse me?”
    “You keep your feelings about what you do locked inside. You don’t share. You don’t get over it. You push it down and pretend the bad stuff didn’t happen.” Running from the piles of emotional baggage drove him. It was as if he’d be smothered if he ever stopped long enough to relax.
    His expression went blank. “It sounds like you’ve given this some thought.”
    Every single day since they’d been apart. “I’m serious, Connor.”
    “I can see that.”
    But he didn’t. He watched her and shot back strained responses, but he refused to walk through any of it with her. To give her a chance to shoulder some of the burden and ease whatever doubts and pain twisted in his gut.
    She leaned back and rested her head against the wall. “Forget it.”
    “That’s unexpected. You, giving up... Let’s just say I’m not used to it.” He stared at the ceiling and made a face as if he mulling over his words. “Or I wasn’t until you walked out.”
    The verbal shot knocked into her. Sliced her clean through.
    She needed air. Standing up, she brushed by him on the way to the cave entrance. “How long have you been waiting to say that?”
    “Whoa.” He caught her arm and spun her around to face him.
    Even though it was childish and stupid, she wanted to look anywhere but at him. Not give him the satisfaction. “Something else you want to add?”
    “I shouldn’t have said that.”
    Not that she didn’t deserve it. He meant that he should have tamped his anger with her down inside as well. He didn’t say it, but she knew that’s where his mind wandered.
    “I left because I felt suffocated.” Because she wanted to get his attention and make him understand.
    “You already told me that.”
    “Forget it. It’s fine.” With