Read Online The Whole Story of Half a Girl by Veera Hiranandani - Free Book Online

pink nails and the right sweat suit, but she can’t do a toe-touch to save her life.
    * * *
    For the rest of the week I practice cheers. Natasha is my best audience. I even try to teach her some moves, and the way she stomps through the cheers like a little soldier cracks me up. We tumble on the floor in giggling fits, which is the only thing that seems to get Mom to smile. Otherwise she just watches with her arms crossed, nodding here and there. Once she told me not to shake my butt so much on one of the cheers. When I’m not around her I keep shaking it.
    I start sitting with Kate at lunch. Some days I’d rather sit with Alisha, but it seems weird not to sit with Kate since cheerleading has more or less taken over our lives. At least now all the Jessicas leave me alone. But once in a while I see Alisha stealing a glance at me over her notebook in the cafeteria.
    The night before tryouts, I know that doing one more toe-touch won’t make a difference. My body aches and I’ve never been so tired, but I can’t sleep. I decide to go downstairs and warm some milk in the microwave. Mom says milk has something in it that’s supposed to help. If there’s anything to worry about, I’ll stay up and worry. When I was younger and couldn’t sleep, I’d tiptoe into my parents’ room to watch them sleep. Dad’s a different person when he’s sleeping. His face is so still, as if he isn’t in his body anymore. Sometimes I’d have to check by opening one of his eyes.
    “Dad,” I’d ask into his rolled-up eyeball, “are you in there?”His awake self would snap back into his sleeping body and he’d sit up with a jerk, but he’d never get mad. “I’m always here, even when it seems like I’m not,” he’d say, slow and heavy. Then he’d tell me to go back to bed and wait for sleep to find me. “If you lie still enough, it will.” And it would, but only after I’d hear him say it.
    I think of this now as I creep down the stairs in my T-shirt and bare feet. The door to his study is open a crack and the yellow light of his desk lamp spills out, beckoning me. I push it open, but his desk chair is empty. “Dad?” I whisper. Then I see him on the other side of the room, sleeping on the leather couch in his robe. He breathes deeply and I rest my hand on his stomach. He opens his eyes, but doesn’t seem surprised that I’m standing right there.
    “Dad?” I whisper again. “Can I tell you something?”
    He nods a little.
    “I’m trying out for cheerleading tomorrow and I’m going to do every cheer for you.”
    He stares at me for another second and I wonder if he heard me. Then he smiles and puts his hand on my shoulder before closing his eyes again. I want to ask him why he’s sleeping on the couch. To ask him if he misses his old job like I miss Community. But his face goes still again. I watch his chest going up and down, up and down for a few more moments before I head out to the kitchen.

chapter twelve
    I eat two bowls of Cheerios to give me extra energy for tryouts. Mom rushes around, making sure she has her phone, her keys, her big black bag stuffed with her laptop, and the right books, and kisses me on the forehead. She whispers in my ear a tight “good luck” and then she’s out the door. My stomach churns as I listen to the back door close and her car tires rolling out on the gravel. When I bolt out the door for the bus, Dad calls after me with Natasha by his side. “Sonia!”
    I stop halfway down the driveway and turn around.
    “I’ll cheer for you today too,” he says, and gives me a thumbs-up. Natasha yells, “Go, Sonia!” and tries to do a toe-touch, but only manages to hit her knees.
    I laugh, give them a thumbs-up back, and run the rest of the way.
    * * *
    At school the morning drags. I can practically hear the clock ticking. Kate throws me a note in the middle of Mrs. Langley’s grammar lesson.
    You’re going to do so awesome today. I just know it!
    xxxooo,
Kate
    I’m about to fling a