as leather,â Mother had fussed. Sheâd always been after me for unladylike behavior, but I didnât think that ladies seemed to have much fun. Gardening was the one ladylike activity I loved, because it involved digging in the dirt. On this particular day, Mother and I were mixing old coffee grounds into the soil under the azaleas. She said it made them bloom longer. I remember dipping the grounds out of a big Crisco can, and inhaling deeply. Iâd loved the mingled scent of coffee and dirt and growing things.
So odd, how I could remember long-ago things like they happened yesterday, yet yesterdayâs events seemed covered with moss.
Eddie and Ralph pulled their car into the drive behind us, and I used that infernal walker to get to the porch. Eddie helped me upthe stepsâthe steps were a nice, clean gray, as if theyâd been newly paintedâand then I was in the house, and Snowball was bouncing around my feet, dancing as if it were Christmas, New Yearâs, and every other holiday all rolled into one big, fat, joyful, beefy bone.
Hope picked him up so I didnât trip over him, while Eddie led me into the living room and got me settled in a chair. Hope set Snowball in my lap, where he licked my face and wagged his tail as I talked to him and petted him, and it was only after he calmed down and curled into a soft, strokable ball that I realized I was sitting in the floral chair where my mother used do her hand sewing when she listened to the radio. Of course, that was back when the chair was in her house, and the radio was a piece of furniture.
I closed my eyes and it was like I was transported back to my childhood home. I could practically feel the itchy wool sofa. Daddyâs leather chair was angled beside it, the armrest worn and cracked, and . . .
âOkay, Mom?â
Eddieâs question made me jerk my eyes open. He was sitting on the sofa in my living room and I believe heâd been talking for quite a while, but I hadnât been paying attention. Oh dear. How rude of me!
âOkay?â he asked again.
I was ashamed to admit that I hadnât been following his conversation. âFine,â I said.
Fine
was a word that seemed suitable for most responses.
He rose, and the red-haired man seated beside himâRufus? Rupert? I couldnât recall his name, dadburn itârose with him. âWell, then, weâd better get going. Our plane leaves at noon.â Eddie came over and kissed my cheek. âWeâll be back to get you at the beginning of June.â
Alarm shot through me. âGet me?â I echoed blankly.
âYes, Mom. To move you to San Francisco.â He spoke in a patient tone, as if he were talking to someone who didnât understand English well or was slow-wittedâor nuts.
I hadnât lost my mind. I had the feeling he thought I was crazy.
âWeâve talked about it a lot, remember?â
âYes,â I said, although I didnât remember, not entirely. I remembered talking with Eddie and Hope and some lady at the hospital about how I couldnât live in my house anymore, and I knew Iâd agreed to something, but what that something was, I couldnât quite fix in my mind. The one thing that really mattered was the one thing I knew for sure: Hope was going to stay here and help me pack up the house, bless her heart, and Iâd have the chance to set things right.
But Eddie was talking about what would happen afterward. Maybe Iâd better speak up before Eddieâs plans got too far along to change. âI donât know if weâve discussed it, dear, but as much as I love you, I want to live on my own.â
The redheadâs muffled snort let me know weâd discussed it plenty.
Bless his heartâEddieâs eyes remained warm and patient. âI know, Mom. Weâre going to find a nice assisted living center for you and Snowball.â
âAnd I insist on paying my
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