Read Online The Vicar of Wakefield by Oliver Goldsmith - Free Book Online Page B

have made an
excellent day's work of it.'—'Pretty well,' cried I, not knowing
what to say.—'What only pretty well!' returned she. 'I think it is
very well. Suppose the girls should come to make acquaintances of
taste in town! This I am assured of, that London is the only place
in the world for all manner of husbands. Besides, my dear, stranger
things happen every day: and as ladies of quality are so taken with
my daughters, what will not men of quality be! Entre nous, I
protest I like my Lady Blarney vastly, so very obliging. However,
Miss Carolina Wilelmina Anielia Skeggs has my warm heart. But yet,
when they came to talk of places in town, you saw at once how I
nailed them. Tell me, my dear, don't you think I did for my
children there?'—'Ay,' returned I, not knowing well what to think
of the matter, 'heaven grant they may be both the better for it
this day three months!' This was one of those observations I
usually made to impress my wife with an opinion of my sagacity; for
if the girls succeeded, then it was a pious wish fulfilled; but if
any thing unfortunate ensued, then it might be looked upon as a
prophecy. All this conversation, however, was only preparatory to
another scheme, and indeed I dreaded as much. This was nothing less
than, that as we were now to hold up our heads a little higher in
the world, it would be proper to sell the Colt, which was grown
old, at a neighbouring fair, and buy us an horse that would carry
single or double upon an occasion, and make a pretty appearance at
church or upon a visit. This at first I opposed stoutly; but it was
as stoutly defended. However, as I weakened, my antagonist gained
strength, till at last it was resolved to part with him.
    As the fair happened on the following day, I had intentions of
going myself, but my wife persuaded me that I had got a cold, and
nothing could prevail upon her to permit me from home. 'No, my
dear,' said she, 'our son Moses is a discreet boy, and can buy and
sell to very good advantage; you know all our great bargains are of
his purchasing. He always stands out and higgles, and actually
tires them till he gets a bargain.'
    As I had some opinion of my son's prudence, I was willing enough
to entrust him with this commission; and the next morning I
perceived his sisters mighty busy in fitting out Moses for the
fair; trimming his hair, brushing his buckles, and cocking his hat
with pins. The business of the toilet being over, we had at last
the satisfaction of seeing him mounted upon the Colt, with a deal
box before him to bring home groceries in. He had on a coat made of
that cloth they call thunder and lightning, which, though grown too
short, was much too good to be thrown away. His waistcoat was of
gosling green, and his sisters had tied his hair with a broad black
ribband. We all followed him several paces, from the door, bawling
after him good luck, good luck, till we could see him no
longer.
    He was scarce gone, when Mr Thornhill's butler came to
congratulate us upon our good fortune, saying, that he overheard
his young master mention our names with great commendation.
    Good fortune seemed resolved not to come alone. Another footman
from the same family followed, with a card for my daughters,
importing, that the two ladies had received such pleasing accounts
from Mr Thornhill of us all, that, after a few previous enquiries,
they hoped to be perfectly satisfied. 'Ay,' cried my wife, I now
see it is no easy matter to get into the families of the great; but
when one once gets in, then, as Moses says, one may go sleep.' To
this piece of humour, for she intended it for wit, my daughters
assented with a loud laugh of pleasure. In short, such was her
satisfaction at this message, that she actually put her hand in her
pocket, and gave the messenger seven-pence halfpenny.
    This was to be our visiting-day. The next that came was Mr
Burchell, who had been at the fair. He brought my little ones a
pennyworth of gingerbread each, which my wife undertook