Read Online The Undesired Princess by L. Sprague deCamp - Free Book Online Page A
Authors: L. Sprague deCamp
Ads: Link
yes,” said the king harrassedly. “He will put firecrackers around. It runs to quite a bill. But that’ll be all right now, heh, because we’ll transfer the gunpowder in the royal arsenal to our privy purse at a forced-sale price. We have to get rid of it somehow now that the army’s being disbanded. Here, dear boy, have another drink!”
“Doesn’t Argimanda take any?” asked Hobart, accepting.
“Why no, she’s good. Thought you knew. How’s your appetite?”
“Could eat a horse and chase the driver,” said Hobart.
The king looked a little taken aback; then he took the butler aside and whispered to him.
Prince Alaxius had just finished his second cocktail. He now stood up and stalked about, swinging his long legs, and said: “Rollin, I’ve spent all day mixing pigments to try to get those unearthly shades you wear. But the mixtures come out the same old red, yellow, and blue. Now how—hehehehehehe!”
At the end of this inane giggle, Prince Alaxius sank slowly to his knees on the rug, a wide foolish smile on his face, and collapsed to the floor.
Hobart jumped up and tried to raise Alaxius to his feet.
“Dear, dear,” said the king. “The fool’s intoxicated again. Put him on something, Rollin; it’ll wear off.”
“Seemed perfectly sober a minute ago,” said Hobart.
“Of course, of course; he wasn’t intoxicated then; just about to be. Either one’s intoxicated or one isn’t.”
Alaxius stretched on the sofa, suddenly revived. He passed a hand across his face, grimaced, and said: “Did I make a fool of myself again? Sorry, Father; I miscalculated.”
Hobart, who happened to be bending over Alaxius, said in a low tone: “Could I see you later?” The aesthetic prince nodded briefly.
Hobart turned to King Gordius: “What’s this about the privy purse and so? I ought to know something about the way the finances of the kingdom are handled.”
“Well,” said the king, “let’s see. Suppose Charion decides we need more revenue. He gets the royal treasurer to draw up a tax bill, and brings it to me for signature—”
“Excuse me,” said Hobart, “but don’t you have any sort of parliament or congress?”
“What? I don’t know what you mean.”
Hobart started to explain about these institutions. The king seemed intensely interested; pressed Hobart for more and more details, while Argimanda hung fascinated on his words and Alaxius oozed boredom. The lion had begun to snore. After they had sat down to dinner, the Affable Monarch continued to pump the engineer.
“Yes, yes,” he said. “That’s a most remarkable idea. I see I shall have to take it up with Charion.”
Queen Vasalina put in a worried question: “Rollin dear, don’t you like your steak?”
“What is it?” asked Hobart with a sickly smile. The meat was not only tough, but had a strange and not very agreeable flavor.
“Horse,” said the king. “You just said you’d eat one. And in case you still feel like chasing a driver after dinner, I’ve ordered one to wait outside. Of course if you catch him you mustn’t really eat him, you know . . .”
###
“All right, my man,” said Prince Alaxius, disposing himself on Hobart’s bed with his hands clasped behind his head, “say your little say.”
Hobart had begged off any extended visit with the king and queen or their daughter after dinner. He sat in his armchair and lit his remaining cigar before answering: “I need a little advice, Alaxius.”
“Ask away.”
“How do you react to the last two days’ events?”
Alaxius yawned. “If you expect me to say I’m pleased, I shall have to disappoint you.”
“Not so disappointed at that. Mean I’m not the brother-in-law you’d have picked?”
“It is not that, Rollin. While I don’t know what Argimanda sees in you, I’d ordinarily not care whom she married. But it’s this half-the-kingdom business.”
“Ah,” said Hobart, “now we’re getting somewhere. Mean you’d have gotten the
“Doesn’t Argimanda take any?” asked Hobart, accepting.
“Why no, she’s good. Thought you knew. How’s your appetite?”
“Could eat a horse and chase the driver,” said Hobart.
The king looked a little taken aback; then he took the butler aside and whispered to him.
Prince Alaxius had just finished his second cocktail. He now stood up and stalked about, swinging his long legs, and said: “Rollin, I’ve spent all day mixing pigments to try to get those unearthly shades you wear. But the mixtures come out the same old red, yellow, and blue. Now how—hehehehehehe!”
At the end of this inane giggle, Prince Alaxius sank slowly to his knees on the rug, a wide foolish smile on his face, and collapsed to the floor.
Hobart jumped up and tried to raise Alaxius to his feet.
“Dear, dear,” said the king. “The fool’s intoxicated again. Put him on something, Rollin; it’ll wear off.”
“Seemed perfectly sober a minute ago,” said Hobart.
“Of course, of course; he wasn’t intoxicated then; just about to be. Either one’s intoxicated or one isn’t.”
Alaxius stretched on the sofa, suddenly revived. He passed a hand across his face, grimaced, and said: “Did I make a fool of myself again? Sorry, Father; I miscalculated.”
Hobart, who happened to be bending over Alaxius, said in a low tone: “Could I see you later?” The aesthetic prince nodded briefly.
Hobart turned to King Gordius: “What’s this about the privy purse and so? I ought to know something about the way the finances of the kingdom are handled.”
“Well,” said the king, “let’s see. Suppose Charion decides we need more revenue. He gets the royal treasurer to draw up a tax bill, and brings it to me for signature—”
“Excuse me,” said Hobart, “but don’t you have any sort of parliament or congress?”
“What? I don’t know what you mean.”
Hobart started to explain about these institutions. The king seemed intensely interested; pressed Hobart for more and more details, while Argimanda hung fascinated on his words and Alaxius oozed boredom. The lion had begun to snore. After they had sat down to dinner, the Affable Monarch continued to pump the engineer.
“Yes, yes,” he said. “That’s a most remarkable idea. I see I shall have to take it up with Charion.”
Queen Vasalina put in a worried question: “Rollin dear, don’t you like your steak?”
“What is it?” asked Hobart with a sickly smile. The meat was not only tough, but had a strange and not very agreeable flavor.
“Horse,” said the king. “You just said you’d eat one. And in case you still feel like chasing a driver after dinner, I’ve ordered one to wait outside. Of course if you catch him you mustn’t really eat him, you know . . .”
###
“All right, my man,” said Prince Alaxius, disposing himself on Hobart’s bed with his hands clasped behind his head, “say your little say.”
Hobart had begged off any extended visit with the king and queen or their daughter after dinner. He sat in his armchair and lit his remaining cigar before answering: “I need a little advice, Alaxius.”
“Ask away.”
“How do you react to the last two days’ events?”
Alaxius yawned. “If you expect me to say I’m pleased, I shall have to disappoint you.”
“Not so disappointed at that. Mean I’m not the brother-in-law you’d have picked?”
“It is not that, Rollin. While I don’t know what Argimanda sees in you, I’d ordinarily not care whom she married. But it’s this half-the-kingdom business.”
“Ah,” said Hobart, “now we’re getting somewhere. Mean you’d have gotten the
Similar Books
