even when my back was turned.
“Go away,” I said over my shoulder. I didn’t want to talk to him. I thought I’d made that clear when I walked away.
Kellan placed a hand on my arm. I shook it off, noticing that for the first time ever his touch lead to no reaction. Nothing. No tingles. No shaking. No longing for more.
My stomping ceased and dirt flew up around my ankles. I was too busy wondering what had happened to my feelings for Kellan to push off the dirt.
“Look,” he said, stepping in front of me. I stepped to the side but he shadowed me. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have said those things to Bryden.”
“So why aren’t you apologizing to him?” I asked.
Kellan looked over my shoulder. “He’s gone.”
I turned around. Bryden had disappeared again, just like he had for the last ten years. I wondered where he’d gone and when I’d see him next. Now that I knew not to underestimate him, that he’d always done what he thought was best for all of us, I looked forward to it.
I turned back to Kellan. For a moment I’d forgotten he was standing in front of me. His hair hung over one eye, but I didn’t want to push it out of the way like I’d longed to yesterday morning.
“That was rude,” I said. “You were rude. I can speak to whomever I choose anytime I want.”
“I know you can, Lianne. I was just worried you were telling him about his Awakening. His birthday isn’t for a couple months yet. The men told me it could be devastating to his mind if the spell is tampered with too soon. I don’t want anything to happen to Bryden,” he insisted. “I’m only trying to help.”
I’d seen Kellan lie so many times, usually in the heat of battle. The only times he’d ever looked me in the eye, without blinking, were the times when he lied to me. I watched his lashes, unmoving, as he stared at me. Bryden was right.
“Am I supposed to believe that?” I asked, pushing him away. Kellan stumbled, obviously surprised by my reaction. Up until now I’d batted my eyelashes at him every time he opened his mouth. Not anymore. He’d have to learn that it was time for me to form my own opinions, in and out of the sparring ring.
He surprised me by laughing again. His head tilted backward and his hair fell back into place.
“I was wondering how the Awakening would affect you,” he said, catching his breath. “I wondered if it would make you feistier, like when you’re in the ring. It definitely has.”
Kellan pulled me into his arms and kissed me. I flattened my palms against his chest, trying to push him away. But his upper arm strength won out over mine. It always did in the ring, which is why I always avoided getting too close to him.
“Stop it,” I mumbled into his lips, refusing to kiss him back.
Kellan nibbled my lower lip one last time before pulling away, but he still held me tight in his arms.
“I was waiting for this,” he said.
“What?”
“For you to drop the sweet little girl act. It’s time to grow up and act like the warrior you are, Lianne.”
“So the reason we got together on your birthday? It was only because you were waiting for the angrier version of me?”
Kellan smiled and raised an eyebrow. “Tell me you don’t like yourself better this way.”
My stomach twisted in knots. All these years I’d loved him unconditionally and he’d only decided to love me because he knew that one day I’d be angrier, tougher, less like the real me. It wasn’t me he loved, just a shadow of the girl he hoped I’d become. And now he thought he had that girl.
Too bad for him the old me wasn’t completely gone, only trying to find a way to reconcile herself with the new girl inside.
“I can’t be around you right now,” I said, stepping backward.
“Lianne.” Kellan’s eyes narrowed. He looked at me the same way he’d looked at Bryden only moments ago. I felt reviled, hated. “Don’t do this. We have a mission. Our people are counting on us and we need to work
“Go away,” I said over my shoulder. I didn’t want to talk to him. I thought I’d made that clear when I walked away.
Kellan placed a hand on my arm. I shook it off, noticing that for the first time ever his touch lead to no reaction. Nothing. No tingles. No shaking. No longing for more.
My stomping ceased and dirt flew up around my ankles. I was too busy wondering what had happened to my feelings for Kellan to push off the dirt.
“Look,” he said, stepping in front of me. I stepped to the side but he shadowed me. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have said those things to Bryden.”
“So why aren’t you apologizing to him?” I asked.
Kellan looked over my shoulder. “He’s gone.”
I turned around. Bryden had disappeared again, just like he had for the last ten years. I wondered where he’d gone and when I’d see him next. Now that I knew not to underestimate him, that he’d always done what he thought was best for all of us, I looked forward to it.
I turned back to Kellan. For a moment I’d forgotten he was standing in front of me. His hair hung over one eye, but I didn’t want to push it out of the way like I’d longed to yesterday morning.
“That was rude,” I said. “You were rude. I can speak to whomever I choose anytime I want.”
“I know you can, Lianne. I was just worried you were telling him about his Awakening. His birthday isn’t for a couple months yet. The men told me it could be devastating to his mind if the spell is tampered with too soon. I don’t want anything to happen to Bryden,” he insisted. “I’m only trying to help.”
I’d seen Kellan lie so many times, usually in the heat of battle. The only times he’d ever looked me in the eye, without blinking, were the times when he lied to me. I watched his lashes, unmoving, as he stared at me. Bryden was right.
“Am I supposed to believe that?” I asked, pushing him away. Kellan stumbled, obviously surprised by my reaction. Up until now I’d batted my eyelashes at him every time he opened his mouth. Not anymore. He’d have to learn that it was time for me to form my own opinions, in and out of the sparring ring.
He surprised me by laughing again. His head tilted backward and his hair fell back into place.
“I was wondering how the Awakening would affect you,” he said, catching his breath. “I wondered if it would make you feistier, like when you’re in the ring. It definitely has.”
Kellan pulled me into his arms and kissed me. I flattened my palms against his chest, trying to push him away. But his upper arm strength won out over mine. It always did in the ring, which is why I always avoided getting too close to him.
“Stop it,” I mumbled into his lips, refusing to kiss him back.
Kellan nibbled my lower lip one last time before pulling away, but he still held me tight in his arms.
“I was waiting for this,” he said.
“What?”
“For you to drop the sweet little girl act. It’s time to grow up and act like the warrior you are, Lianne.”
“So the reason we got together on your birthday? It was only because you were waiting for the angrier version of me?”
Kellan smiled and raised an eyebrow. “Tell me you don’t like yourself better this way.”
My stomach twisted in knots. All these years I’d loved him unconditionally and he’d only decided to love me because he knew that one day I’d be angrier, tougher, less like the real me. It wasn’t me he loved, just a shadow of the girl he hoped I’d become. And now he thought he had that girl.
Too bad for him the old me wasn’t completely gone, only trying to find a way to reconcile herself with the new girl inside.
“I can’t be around you right now,” I said, stepping backward.
“Lianne.” Kellan’s eyes narrowed. He looked at me the same way he’d looked at Bryden only moments ago. I felt reviled, hated. “Don’t do this. We have a mission. Our people are counting on us and we need to work
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