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Authors: Deidre Berry
Tags: en
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teeth.
âSo yâall going out again?â Yvette asked.
âWhat? Girlâ¦bye!â I said, and hung up the phone in her face.
Â
Nothing is at last sacred but the integrity of your own mind.
âRalph Waldo Emerson
FRIDAY
And the lessons for today are:
Â
1) Internet dating be damned! No matter how good their profile sounds
2) Yvetteâs taste in men absolutely cannot be trusted
What was I thinking, allowing Yvette to choose a man for me when she canât even find a decent man for herself?
After all, this is a woman who is so desperately seeking a husband that sheâs giving multiple dates to guys who should never have even gotten her phone number in the first place.
Damn it!
If things had worked out as planned, I would just be returning from my honeymoon in Aruba; tan, well-rested, and possibly pregnant. Instead, Iâm here dealing with an alligator-in-ninety-degree-heat wearing, schizophrenic bozo that canât even piss straight.
Well, starting off this badly means things can only get better from here. They damn sure canât get any worse.
At least I hope not.
6
My team arrived at the Max Mara boutique at six oâclock this morning to get things ready for the grand opening scheduled for later this afternoon.
Event days are the culmination of months, and sometimes a year or more, of hard work and preparation. These days are what I live for, because it is so rewarding to see the clientâs fantasies come to life.
The headaches started right away.
The first mishap of the day came when two low-level members of the design team, broke one of the glass display cases while moving it during the setup.
âIâll take care of it,â I sighed.
Three hours and many phone calls later, I was finally able to locate a glass company who could rush right over and replace the broken glass display case before the event started.
Next, I had to contend with Erin, who was having a major meltdown and could not focus on the tasks at hand. Apparently, she went home last night to find that her boyfriend John had just upped and hightailed it back to Omaha, taking the cat and most of her furniture along with him.
Erin wasnât the only one having problems at home, either. Demetrius, our in-house florist, had been on the phone arguing with his life partner, Burt, for half the day, but at least he was getting his work done, which was more than I could say for Erin.
âItâs exactly like that old Gladys Knight songâ¦â Erin sobbed, to no one in particular.
âWhich one?â Steve, the lighting guy asked from across the room.
âThe one where the guy couldnât make it in the big city and he had to go back to his old life with his tail tucked between his legs,â Erin said, just standing around, not even pretending to be working.
âOh, you mean âMidnight Train to Georgia?â asked Inez, a member of the design team.
âYeah, thatâs it. I mean, there is absolutely nothing in Omaha, which is why we moved to Kansas City in the first place,â Erin said. âWhat kind of life is he going to have now?â
Finally, I had to pull Erinâs ditzy ass aside and remind her that this was not the time or place for her personal issues. âErin, do you remember that conversation we had a while back, about emotions in the workplace, and whatâs appropriate and whatâs not?â I asked.
âYesâ¦â she said, wiping her tears with the back of her hand.
âSo letâs concentrate on kicking ass with this event,â I said. âAnd afterwards we can go out for drinks and talk about John, okay?â
Erin sniveled, nodded, and got to work.
Jeezâ¦
My specialty is behind-the-scenes chaos management.
Although I do know a few design tricks, Martha Stewart and B. Smith have nothing to worry about as far as I am concerned, because decorating is not my forte.
For years, I have worked hard on enhancing
âSo yâall going out again?â Yvette asked.
âWhat? Girlâ¦bye!â I said, and hung up the phone in her face.
Â
Nothing is at last sacred but the integrity of your own mind.
âRalph Waldo Emerson
FRIDAY
And the lessons for today are:
Â
1) Internet dating be damned! No matter how good their profile sounds
2) Yvetteâs taste in men absolutely cannot be trusted
What was I thinking, allowing Yvette to choose a man for me when she canât even find a decent man for herself?
After all, this is a woman who is so desperately seeking a husband that sheâs giving multiple dates to guys who should never have even gotten her phone number in the first place.
Damn it!
If things had worked out as planned, I would just be returning from my honeymoon in Aruba; tan, well-rested, and possibly pregnant. Instead, Iâm here dealing with an alligator-in-ninety-degree-heat wearing, schizophrenic bozo that canât even piss straight.
Well, starting off this badly means things can only get better from here. They damn sure canât get any worse.
At least I hope not.
6
My team arrived at the Max Mara boutique at six oâclock this morning to get things ready for the grand opening scheduled for later this afternoon.
Event days are the culmination of months, and sometimes a year or more, of hard work and preparation. These days are what I live for, because it is so rewarding to see the clientâs fantasies come to life.
The headaches started right away.
The first mishap of the day came when two low-level members of the design team, broke one of the glass display cases while moving it during the setup.
âIâll take care of it,â I sighed.
Three hours and many phone calls later, I was finally able to locate a glass company who could rush right over and replace the broken glass display case before the event started.
Next, I had to contend with Erin, who was having a major meltdown and could not focus on the tasks at hand. Apparently, she went home last night to find that her boyfriend John had just upped and hightailed it back to Omaha, taking the cat and most of her furniture along with him.
Erin wasnât the only one having problems at home, either. Demetrius, our in-house florist, had been on the phone arguing with his life partner, Burt, for half the day, but at least he was getting his work done, which was more than I could say for Erin.
âItâs exactly like that old Gladys Knight songâ¦â Erin sobbed, to no one in particular.
âWhich one?â Steve, the lighting guy asked from across the room.
âThe one where the guy couldnât make it in the big city and he had to go back to his old life with his tail tucked between his legs,â Erin said, just standing around, not even pretending to be working.
âOh, you mean âMidnight Train to Georgia?â asked Inez, a member of the design team.
âYeah, thatâs it. I mean, there is absolutely nothing in Omaha, which is why we moved to Kansas City in the first place,â Erin said. âWhat kind of life is he going to have now?â
Finally, I had to pull Erinâs ditzy ass aside and remind her that this was not the time or place for her personal issues. âErin, do you remember that conversation we had a while back, about emotions in the workplace, and whatâs appropriate and whatâs not?â I asked.
âYesâ¦â she said, wiping her tears with the back of her hand.
âSo letâs concentrate on kicking ass with this event,â I said. âAnd afterwards we can go out for drinks and talk about John, okay?â
Erin sniveled, nodded, and got to work.
Jeezâ¦
My specialty is behind-the-scenes chaos management.
Although I do know a few design tricks, Martha Stewart and B. Smith have nothing to worry about as far as I am concerned, because decorating is not my forte.
For years, I have worked hard on enhancing
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