The Darker Side of Mummy Misfit #2

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Book: The Darker Side of Mummy Misfit #2 by Amanda Egan Read Free Book Online
Authors: Amanda Egan
Tags: Humor, Humorous, Literature & Fiction, Humor & Entertainment, General Humor, Humor & Satire
    We had a fantastic lunch and I was a really big and brave girl and asked them to show me the nursery and all the bits and pieces they’d bought for the baby.
    Rick’s done the most amazing job on the room and painted a stunning mural on one wall depicting a forest of magical creatures.
    I’ve known him all these years and never knew he had such a talent.
    It was just as I was admiring a teeny-tiny toadstool sprinkled with what looked like fairy dust, that I had my brainwave.
    Nic plans to carry on acting when they have Mikhail but Rick’s said he’d like to be a stay-at-home dad.  They’ve been having major worries about money though as Nic’s theatrical income can be very sporadic.
    My idea shot out of my mouth before I’d had the chance to let it fully form.
    “This sort of thing would go a bomb at Manor House and the other local prep schools.  Why don’t you take on commissions?”
    Ned agreed that it was a great idea.  Rick said he had considered it but it would mean leaving Mikhail with a nanny and they didn’t want to do that.
    That’s when I opened my big mouth again.
    “Well I’m not working now Fenella and I have sold the party business (for a nice little profit, I might add - enough for us to have a pool installed at the villa.   So posh!), so I could have him on the odd days you work.”
    Two poofs and a husband looked at me in shocked silence.
    “ What ?” I asked.  “What’s so wrong with that?  It makes perfect sense.  I’ve got the time and the experience, you know you can trust me and I don’t charge.”
    By the time we set off home, it was all agreed.  Rick would take a stall at the Christmas fair, displaying samples of his work on boards and with photos, and he’d donate 10% of any commissions booked on the day.
    Ned broke the silence in the car with a sleeping Max, Dog and Dot in the back.
    “Have you gone quite mad, Lib?  What if we have another baby?  What happens then?  I don’t think you’ve thought this through, you know.”
    He still hasn’t cottoned on to the fact that we won’t be having another baby and, anyway, don’t you have to be doing something to make one?
    Monday 3 rd November
    Finally bit the bullet and called sister, Elle.  Did my dutiful aunt bit and asked how Baby Gracie was.
    “She’s great Lib.  And I’m really sorry I’ve not asked you to babysit recently.  Just thought you might need a bit of space and not have babies thrust at you.”
    Told her not to worry and filled her in on the imminent arrival of Baby Mikhail.
    “Yeah, Mum told me Nic and Rick had “bought” a baby.  Very disapproving she was but, of course, she’ll be all over him when she next sees them - that’s just Mum though, a prize bitch!”
    Calling Elle had cheered me up a bit - glad to know I’m not the only one who has issues with Mum, despite what she’d have me believe.
    Nipped in to Mrs S before heading off to meet Fenella and Patience for lunch.  She was sitting in her fireside chair watching a Manilow DVD, dressed in her best sari and cardie and more or less back to her old self.
    “Oh, Libbybeta.  I am waiting for Skunk and his witch doctor to come and take me out to lunch.  We are hitting the town and going to a new veggie place in Camden.  I am very lucky to be having such a kind friend.”
    Skunk really is so good to Mrs S.  Ned had told me that, after she’d had her fall and was unable to continue with ‘Ba’s Kitchen’, not only did Skunk insist on paying her a retainer, he’d also slipped a sneaky few grand into her bank account.
    When I look back to my first meeting with him last year when she brought him home from computer class, I feel quite guilty about my suspicious reaction to him.
    Mind you, the green hair and piercings didn’t help but it certainly reinforces the old adage “don’t judge a book by its cover”. 

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