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Authors: Leah Fleming
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vast dining room where people were sitting around looking lost.
‘It’s in Ohio, close to a city called Cleveland. It’s not exactly pretty or ancient, like Lichfield, but I suppose I call it home. America is huge; you’ll get used to it.’
‘Oh, no, I’m going back to England. I can’t stay here, not now,’ May replied.
‘Don’t make any decisions yet. See how things turn out.’
‘But I want to go back. There’s nothing for us here. This was Joe’s dream, never mine.’ Her lip trembled. She’d never felt so alone, so far away from all she knew. ‘They’ll give us a return ticket, won’t they?’
‘I’m sure they will.’ Celeste could see the panic on her face and wanted to comfort her. ‘Don’t look so worried. I’ll help you. The White Star Line must compensate you for your loss. Now I must go in search of news of Mrs Grant . . . I do hope she survived.’
‘Thank you, you’ve been so kind.’ May started to shake again and Celeste found her a corner to sit down. ‘Joe had such plans. I can’t believe this is happening. What did we do to deserve this, Celestine?’
‘We did nothing but trust ourselves to the good offices of the White Star Line. They will have to account in a court of law for all this. Now you must rest. You’ll feel more yourself with fresh clothes and a warm bath. I’ll go with Ella and see if my old lady was rescued. Your baby’s safe with me and may possibly tug some heartstrings for information.’
‘No!’ May shouted. ‘I mean, please, the baby stays with me. I don’t want to let her out of my sight.’ May clutched the bundle of blankets for dear life. ‘Thank you kindly, ma’am, but we’ll stay put.’
The poor girl couldn’t let Ella out of her sight. It must be the shock, Celeste thought as she went back on deck. Looking up, she saw that the ship’s flag flew at half mast. Soon they would all be gathering down below for the remembrance service. She didn’t envy the person having to lead such a sorrowful gathering but the dead must be honoured.
19
May was glad to be alone, away from prying questions, however kindly meant. Celeste’s offer to take Ella had rattled her resolve. Should she disappear, take Ella to the purser’s office and confess her mistake? Should she give up the baby and hide away from the world with just her grief for company? She could claim her dreadful error was brought about by shock. There would be no harm done and she needn’t face the lady again. Celestine. What a name to have to cart around.
She kept bouncing the baby on her knee, barely hoping someone would recognize her but no one did, walking past with dazed looks on their faces. She has no one and you have no one, where’s the harm in passing her off as your own? The battle for and against keeping Ella raged in May’s mind like a fever. They had to salvage something out of this terrible event. If Ella was orphaned, she might be adopted by rich Americans and given every luxury far beyond May’s means. What did she have? She had nothing to offer her but love.
But what if the baby was dumped in an orphanage? They would do their best for her but house mothers were busy and surrounded by needy children. There was never enough attention to go around. May could all too easily recall the pushing and shoving, the second-hand toys, the same grey uniform and regimented routines. Even hair was bobbed and cropped to save time. No one was going to cut off these beautiful black curls.
May took a deep breath. What was done was done. There was no going back now.
20
After the remembrance service, the survivors crowded together in the First Class saloon. May and Celeste stood in silence with the other shocked passengers and crew. It was whispered that some survivors had died on the ship and would be buried later in the afternoon. Celeste, who’d had no information so far, made for the purser’s office to check once again if anyone had heard of Mrs Grant. The news was good.
‘It’s in Ohio, close to a city called Cleveland. It’s not exactly pretty or ancient, like Lichfield, but I suppose I call it home. America is huge; you’ll get used to it.’
‘Oh, no, I’m going back to England. I can’t stay here, not now,’ May replied.
‘Don’t make any decisions yet. See how things turn out.’
‘But I want to go back. There’s nothing for us here. This was Joe’s dream, never mine.’ Her lip trembled. She’d never felt so alone, so far away from all she knew. ‘They’ll give us a return ticket, won’t they?’
‘I’m sure they will.’ Celeste could see the panic on her face and wanted to comfort her. ‘Don’t look so worried. I’ll help you. The White Star Line must compensate you for your loss. Now I must go in search of news of Mrs Grant . . . I do hope she survived.’
‘Thank you, you’ve been so kind.’ May started to shake again and Celeste found her a corner to sit down. ‘Joe had such plans. I can’t believe this is happening. What did we do to deserve this, Celestine?’
‘We did nothing but trust ourselves to the good offices of the White Star Line. They will have to account in a court of law for all this. Now you must rest. You’ll feel more yourself with fresh clothes and a warm bath. I’ll go with Ella and see if my old lady was rescued. Your baby’s safe with me and may possibly tug some heartstrings for information.’
‘No!’ May shouted. ‘I mean, please, the baby stays with me. I don’t want to let her out of my sight.’ May clutched the bundle of blankets for dear life. ‘Thank you kindly, ma’am, but we’ll stay put.’
The poor girl couldn’t let Ella out of her sight. It must be the shock, Celeste thought as she went back on deck. Looking up, she saw that the ship’s flag flew at half mast. Soon they would all be gathering down below for the remembrance service. She didn’t envy the person having to lead such a sorrowful gathering but the dead must be honoured.
19
May was glad to be alone, away from prying questions, however kindly meant. Celeste’s offer to take Ella had rattled her resolve. Should she disappear, take Ella to the purser’s office and confess her mistake? Should she give up the baby and hide away from the world with just her grief for company? She could claim her dreadful error was brought about by shock. There would be no harm done and she needn’t face the lady again. Celestine. What a name to have to cart around.
She kept bouncing the baby on her knee, barely hoping someone would recognize her but no one did, walking past with dazed looks on their faces. She has no one and you have no one, where’s the harm in passing her off as your own? The battle for and against keeping Ella raged in May’s mind like a fever. They had to salvage something out of this terrible event. If Ella was orphaned, she might be adopted by rich Americans and given every luxury far beyond May’s means. What did she have? She had nothing to offer her but love.
But what if the baby was dumped in an orphanage? They would do their best for her but house mothers were busy and surrounded by needy children. There was never enough attention to go around. May could all too easily recall the pushing and shoving, the second-hand toys, the same grey uniform and regimented routines. Even hair was bobbed and cropped to save time. No one was going to cut off these beautiful black curls.
May took a deep breath. What was done was done. There was no going back now.
20
After the remembrance service, the survivors crowded together in the First Class saloon. May and Celeste stood in silence with the other shocked passengers and crew. It was whispered that some survivors had died on the ship and would be buried later in the afternoon. Celeste, who’d had no information so far, made for the purser’s office to check once again if anyone had heard of Mrs Grant. The news was good.
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