Read Online The Broken Girl (Lonely Girl Book 2) by Gracie Wilson - Free Book Online
Authors: Gracie Wilson
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really don’t know how I feel anymore. But even if he never remembers me, this new guy he seems to be grabbed a bit of my heart too.
I wait twenty minutes before I go back to Jake’s room, hoping he will not be able to tell I’ve been crying. “Becca, I thought you left.” I shake my head, unsure if I trust myself to talk. “Becca, what happened? You were with Keegan, weren’t you? Drake said he’s getting to go home today?”
Home? That’s not his home. “What I’m about to say… Jake, you have to respond to this as my friend and if you can’t, it just proves that we can’t just be friends.” I feel him tense but he says nothing. “Keegan kissed me.” I hear him gasp but don’t look at him. Instead, I’m staring at the floral picture that is hanging from the wall in Jake’s hospital room.
“Becca… look at me, okay?” I reluctantly pull my eyes from the picture to Jake’s eyes. I expect to see anger or sadness but I’m met with his understanding eyes.
“I know this is hard, not just for you, but for Keegan. This whole thing is fucked up and there’s no way around it. We just have to be honest so that we all make it through this in one piece. I know that none of what you are feeling means that you don’t love me, Becca.” I nod because I don’t think I could open my mouth without sobs escaping. Jake knows me so well. How will I ever make this unbelievable choice? “We haven’t really talked about this, but… I heard you, Becca. That night you said you loved me and that you were in love with me. That you didn’t want me to leave you alone, and that you needed me. Dammit, Becca, don’t you see? I loved you before you even said one word to me. I saw this lonely girl sitting there at the lake, lost and alone, but I saw something in her. Hope, a new beginning, one that I wanted to be a part of. I was just scared once we had this amazing friendship that I’d ruin it if you didn’t feel the same way. I could never leave you alone, Becca; you’re my ending, and no one else. I need you more than you will ever need me.”
I want to pull away because my heart can’t take anymore now that it’s torn in three. The love I have for my Keegan, Jake, and the new Keegan that has crept up on me. Jake just looks at me, waiting for an answer, I can’t give him one I don’t know myself. “Becca, I know you love him, but you love me too. Right now isn’t our time, but it will be soon. Keegan will either remember or he won’t but he will still need his friends. He’s going home today and he’s going to need all the help he can get.” I was feeling warm and fuzzy until that moment. Something in me snapped and I couldn’t hold back my anger.
“Ugh! Why does everyone keep saying that? It’s not his home, it’s a new place that he is all alone in when he should have been with my brother… or better yet, he shouldn’t have even met me. I never should have come to Lakehead.” I immediately regretted lashing out at Jake but I couldn’t help it. I look back to Jake and I see he’s struggling to hold back tears. “Jake, I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have yelled at you.” He shakes his head and I look away from this raw emotion I’m seeing from him. “Becca, it’s not because you got upset. I understand your anger. Just… never say that again. Don’t ever say you shouldn’t have come here because that’s what hurts. Thinking that I won’t have you in my life. That’s a life I’m not interested in being a part of. I will always choose you, Becca.”
The emotions that I feel from his words cause my heart to go into a frenzy. I can barely catch my breath and I feel like I’m being suffocated. It’s too much, too fast. I barely feel like me anymore and to hear him say all this just makes that more apparent. “Jacob, I love you, but my life is just so thoroughly screwed up right now. I just… I need some air. I will be back in a few hours, okay? I promise. I’m not trying to run out on
I wait twenty minutes before I go back to Jake’s room, hoping he will not be able to tell I’ve been crying. “Becca, I thought you left.” I shake my head, unsure if I trust myself to talk. “Becca, what happened? You were with Keegan, weren’t you? Drake said he’s getting to go home today?”
Home? That’s not his home. “What I’m about to say… Jake, you have to respond to this as my friend and if you can’t, it just proves that we can’t just be friends.” I feel him tense but he says nothing. “Keegan kissed me.” I hear him gasp but don’t look at him. Instead, I’m staring at the floral picture that is hanging from the wall in Jake’s hospital room.
“Becca… look at me, okay?” I reluctantly pull my eyes from the picture to Jake’s eyes. I expect to see anger or sadness but I’m met with his understanding eyes.
“I know this is hard, not just for you, but for Keegan. This whole thing is fucked up and there’s no way around it. We just have to be honest so that we all make it through this in one piece. I know that none of what you are feeling means that you don’t love me, Becca.” I nod because I don’t think I could open my mouth without sobs escaping. Jake knows me so well. How will I ever make this unbelievable choice? “We haven’t really talked about this, but… I heard you, Becca. That night you said you loved me and that you were in love with me. That you didn’t want me to leave you alone, and that you needed me. Dammit, Becca, don’t you see? I loved you before you even said one word to me. I saw this lonely girl sitting there at the lake, lost and alone, but I saw something in her. Hope, a new beginning, one that I wanted to be a part of. I was just scared once we had this amazing friendship that I’d ruin it if you didn’t feel the same way. I could never leave you alone, Becca; you’re my ending, and no one else. I need you more than you will ever need me.”
I want to pull away because my heart can’t take anymore now that it’s torn in three. The love I have for my Keegan, Jake, and the new Keegan that has crept up on me. Jake just looks at me, waiting for an answer, I can’t give him one I don’t know myself. “Becca, I know you love him, but you love me too. Right now isn’t our time, but it will be soon. Keegan will either remember or he won’t but he will still need his friends. He’s going home today and he’s going to need all the help he can get.” I was feeling warm and fuzzy until that moment. Something in me snapped and I couldn’t hold back my anger.
“Ugh! Why does everyone keep saying that? It’s not his home, it’s a new place that he is all alone in when he should have been with my brother… or better yet, he shouldn’t have even met me. I never should have come to Lakehead.” I immediately regretted lashing out at Jake but I couldn’t help it. I look back to Jake and I see he’s struggling to hold back tears. “Jake, I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have yelled at you.” He shakes his head and I look away from this raw emotion I’m seeing from him. “Becca, it’s not because you got upset. I understand your anger. Just… never say that again. Don’t ever say you shouldn’t have come here because that’s what hurts. Thinking that I won’t have you in my life. That’s a life I’m not interested in being a part of. I will always choose you, Becca.”
The emotions that I feel from his words cause my heart to go into a frenzy. I can barely catch my breath and I feel like I’m being suffocated. It’s too much, too fast. I barely feel like me anymore and to hear him say all this just makes that more apparent. “Jacob, I love you, but my life is just so thoroughly screwed up right now. I just… I need some air. I will be back in a few hours, okay? I promise. I’m not trying to run out on
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