lodgings, for these are too mean to be known in; wherefore my steward shall go take a large house, and furnish it nobly, and I will make you a finecoach, and take more servants, and women to wait upon you; for since you have a good estate, you shall live and take pleasure; but I will have no men visitors but what are brought by myself: wherefore entertain no masculine acquaintance, nor give them the least encouragement.
Sir, said she, my duty shall observe all your commands.
When her uncle was gone, Lord, said she, what doth my uncle mean to set me out to show? Sure he means to traffic for a husband; but Heaven forbid those intentions, for I have no mind to marry: but my uncle is wise, and kind, and studies for my good, wherefore I submit, and could now chide myself for these questioning thoughts. Now, said she, I am to consider how I shall be dressed; my uncle saith, I am handsome, I will now try whether others think so as well as he, for I fear my uncle is partial on my side; wherefore I will dress me all in black, and have no colours about me; for if I be gay, I may be taken notice of for my clothes, and so be deceived, thinking it was for my person; and I would gladly know the truth, whether I am handsome or no, for I have no skill in physiognomy; so that I must judge of myself by the approbation of others’ eyes, and not by my own. But if I be, said she, thought handsome, what then? Why then, answered she herself, I shall be cried up to be a beauty; and what then? Then I shall have all eyes stare upon me; and what am I the better, unless their eyes could infuse in my brain, wit and understanding? Their eyes cannot enrich me with knowledge, nor give me the light of truth; for I cannot see with their eyes, nor hear with their ears, no more than their meat can nourish me which they do eat, or rest when they do sleep. Besides, I neither desire to make nor catch lovers, for I have an enmity against mankind, and hold them as my enemies; which if it be a sin, Heaven forgive, that I should for one man’s neglect and perjury, condemn all that sex.
But I find I have a little emulation, 3 which breeds a desire to appear more beautiful than the Duke’s wife, who is reported to be very handsome; for I would not have the world say, he had an advantage by the change: thus I do not envy her, nor covet what she enjoys, for I wish her all happiness, yet I would nothave her happiness raised by my misfortunes; for charity should begin at home; for those that are unjust, or cruel to themselves, will never be merciful and just to others. But, O my contemplations, whither do you run? I fear, not in an even path; for though emulation is not envy, yet the bias leans to that side.
But, said she, to this masque I must go, my uncle hath pressed me to the wars of vanity, where Cupid is general, and leads up the train: but I doubt I shall hang down my head, through shamefastness, 4 like a young soldier, when he hears the bullets fly about his ears: but, O Confidence, thou god of good behaviour, assist me. Well, said she, I will practice against the day, and be in a ready posture. So after two or three days, was the masque; and when she was ready to go, her uncle comes to her, and sees her dressed all in black.
Said he, why have you put yourself all in black?
Sir, said she, I mourn like a young widow, for I have lost my husband.
Now by my troth, said he, and it becomes thee, for you appear like the sun when he breaks through a dark cloud. Says he, I would have you go veiled, for I would have you appear to sight only when you come into the masquing room; and after the masque is done, all the company will rise as it were together, and join into a crowd: then throw your hood over your face, and pass through them as soon as you can, and as obscure, for I will not have you known until we are in a more courtly equipage. So away they went, only he and she, without any attendance; and when they came to enter through the door to the masquing room,
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